Burt Hummel's Guide to Raising a Teenage Son
by AnisaLee
Summary: At the insistence of his son-in-law - aka: Blaine, Burt writes a book based on his experiences raising Kurt and handling the everyday of having a teenage son who just happens to be gay.  Spoilers through season 3.  COMPLETE
1. Chapter 1

I guess I should start by saying that this wasn't my idea. My son-in-law, Blaine, came to me suggesting I write this. He thought it would be healing or comforting or help other parents. Anyways, I should start out by saying that I never claimed to be the model parent. In fact, most of the time I was at a loss when it came to my son, Kurt. I always tried to do right by him.

When I agreed to write this book, I made sure it was okay with Kurt because in order to tell my story, I have to tell his too. Now, you may be wondering why I had to ask his permission, and the answer is that my son is gay. Blaine is his husband. But, before I get into that, I should start at the beginning.

I met my Kurt's mom when I was in junior college. She was a teachers assistant. Now, I must admit that I'm not the smartest guy. Kurt and his mom are book smart. They can read something and just get it. I don't. The only reason I even went to junior college was cause they gave me a scholarship to play football. When I busted my knee out during my third semester, I left the school to study mechanics.

Anyways, back to Kurt's mom. She was beautiful, but she was strong. She had a smile that would light up the entire room, but piss her off and you'd be in for it. I loved that about her. When the class finally ended, I got up the balls to ask her out. I'll never understand why she said yes to a bum like me.

I took her to Breadstix on our first date. The same one that's next to the mall in Lima. I even put on a fancy shirt and tie, trying to impress her. I guess I did something right, cause she agreed to go on more dates with me. I fell hard for her. She was everything I wasn't. When I asked her to marry me three months after we had started our relationship, she just looked at me and said yes and that I had been the one she was waiting for her whole life.

It was about a year later when she found out she was pregnant with a baby and when the doctors told us it was a boy, I was as proud as any father would be. I was going to have a son. Her pregnancy hadn't been easy, that's why we didn't give Kurt a sibling, but when he was born it was the proudest moment of my life. Kurt came out screaming. He had a pair of lungs on him, that kid. When the doctors put him in my arms, I made a promise to always protect and love him.

Around his fifth birthday, Kurt's mom started to notice things about him. I admit that I didn't want to see it. I told myself that all boys his age were asking for dolls for their birthdays. That it was normal for a boy to want a pair of sensible heels. I didn't want to see it. I'm ashamed to admit that at first the thought of having a son who could be like that terrified me to the point where I was almost physically ill. So I kept convincing myself that Kurt was just sensitive and later on in life that would come in handy when he was started to date girls.

One day, Kurt's mother sat me down and told me that she thought Kurt was gay. I didn't believe her. How could she know at such an early age? All kids went through phases. But she insisted that I get used to the idea that Kurt might very well grow up and fall in love with a boy one day. She point blank told me that he was our son and we would love him no matter what.

I was just starting to come to terms with the reality that Kurt might come to his mom and I some day and tell us that he was gay, when she was taken from us. It had happened so suddenly that I couldn't really process it well at the time. A drunk driver. A stupid, teenage drunk driver who wasn't even old enough to buy alcohol had smashed into her car. The doctors said the force of the impact killed her instantly. They all promised she hadn't been in pain. Within that day, everything I had ever come to know was gone. My first thought had been Kurt would never get to hug his mom ever again. I remember trying to think if she had said I love you to Kurt before she left the house and if he had said it to her. They allowed me a few minutes to see her and identify her body. Just like that, she was gone out of my life and I was left a widower and a single father. The worst part is that kid, that damn kid who stole my world from me walked away with a scratch.

The most difficult thing was feeling like I didn't know how to connect to my son. I had to learn to speak his language. To keep things normal for him. I had to learn to raise him without his mother.

So, I guess, the point of this is not to tell you how to raise your kids, cause frankly I'm no one's expert. But more about loving your children no matter what.

(****)****(****)****(****)

**How's that Blaine?**

_I knew this was a good idea. This is going to mean something to a lot of people. You might want to change "cause" to "because" and not start a sentence with "but."_

_I enjoyed reading about your wife. She sounds like an incredible woman. Looking forward to reading your next chapter._

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**Sorry...just take out the parenthesis. FF won't let you post links either D:**

**Also, reviews are always nice! :D**


	2. Chapter 2

Now I'm the first to admit that I'm not the most sensitive guy in the world. I think I've only cried three times in my adult life. The first being when Kurt was born, the second was when my wife died and the third when I got Kurt to tell me about a punk kid who was bullying him at school. I was a man and men didn't cry. At least that's what I'd been taught.

And yet, here I was left to raise the very embodiment of everything I had been conditioned to fear. Do you know what it's like to be afraid of your child? To not know how to even have a simple conversation with him? It's like having this foreigner living in your house that you don't know how to talk to. Kurt's mom always handled him. She quit her job to be at home with him, so I didn't know everything about him. His mom was always there. She held my hand through it. When it was just him and me going out to do something, I knew that when we got home she would be there.

Kurt was his mom's baby. She once bitched out a woman at the toy store for criticizing the bike Kurt picked out. He was obsessed with this green one with pink and white streamers in the handle bars and colored spokes. This woman had the nerve to come up to my wife when Kurt was picking out his helmet and pads and tell her that buying a bike like that for a boy would make him _gay_. I wanted to step in when Kurt's mom turned around and told the woman that she hadn't been aware an object like a bike had a sexuality attached to it and asked her what bikes were the gay bikes, which one's were the straight bike's and which ones were bisexual bikes. She was a pit bull, that one. I loved it. She knew how to protect her child. All Kurt knew was that his mom loved him and wanted him to have whatever toys he wanted.

Of course, Kurt didn't know how to handle his mom's death. He was only 8 when it happened. She was his mom. She was there one morning and then she wasn't. The one thing I'll always remember was he slid his small hand into mine and held on tight. All I knew was I wanted to make it better for him. To give him something, you know? Something to hold on to. Something to make him feel better, but I couldn't.

Every night I'd hear him sniffling through his bedroom door. I could tell he tried to hide it from me. He didn't want his old man to see him cry. That was like a kick in the gut. I tried to comfort him the best I could, but I know it wasn't enough. I hadn't been enough for him then. Even though I tried. The only time I'd ever had to comfort him, besides when he was a baby, was when he fell off his bike and skinned his knee. All I did at the time was pick him back up, bandage his cut and pat him on the cheek, making sure he was okay before sending him back to his bike to try again. But this wasn't like that. I couldn't just put a bandage on it to make the loss of his mom okay.

I think that's when things started to change for me. I couldn't be this macho dude that I had tried to be my entire life. I let that go. I needed to be Kurt's father and step up to the plate like a real man.

Sometimes, well most times I took him to the garage with me instead of getting a sitter. I figured it might be a good to do something together. I could teach him about cars and he could tell me about whatever it was that he liked. Anyone with eyes could see that my kid was different and when I walked him into the garage, I saw some of the new guys eyeing him up. It didn't get past me the jokes they said about him. The way they looked at him and me. I don't put up with that shit. My son was my first priority and anyone who was a threat to him was gone. Those guys didn't have a job the next day.

I guess, things started to even out for us after a while. I learned to be his sole parental provider and he learned to deal with the fact that me and him were it. This was our family now. I know it wasn't fair, that he shouldn't have to learn that lesson. But that's what had happened. Like my junior college ball coach said, "Hummel, you gotta suck it up and just fucking go with it." And that's what we did. I taught him how to rebuild a 1973 Chevy Camaro and he invited me to backyard tea parties. Let me tell you, sitting on that pink plastic chair, pulled up to a pink plastic table with a green porcelain tea cup in my hand and fake finger desserts spread out in front of me, I couldn't help but watch my son. He was the bravest kid I knew. He wasn't afraid to be himself and have fun the way he wanted to. He sure as hell didn't get that from me.

For a few years things were good. Well, not good, but okay. We were fine. Kurt was fine. The kid went to school, got good grades. Like I said, my kid's book smart. He even started to make a few friends. It was like finally he was getting back to normal. After all he'd been through, he needed friends. It was good until it wasn't.

Kids can be cruel little assholes. Now, I'm not saying that I wasn't any different. I was an asshole kid until I met Kurt's mom. I said things and did things and didn't give a shit about the consequences. But I thought these kids were brought up differently. Had been more accepting or whatever. I'll never forget the day Kurt came to me asking what a _fag_ was. Some kid had called him that at gym class because he wanted to play soccer with the girls instead of football with the boys. The teacher didn't even address it. I knew that his mom would've known how to handle this situation. She would be able to make it better. She would've had the answers. For the first time in a while, I wished that my kid was like the other boys. It wasn't because I was ashamed of him. It was because he wouldn't have to see how mean kids can be.

I didn't know how to explain that word to him. So I didn't. Not really. I told him it was a mean name that boy called him. I probably should have said something better, but what do you tell an 11 year old? Maybe it was stupid not to just come out and tell him. Explain it to him, but I was terrified. Scared if I explained the word fag, I'd also have to tell him about gay and maybe he would say he was that. I couldn't handle it at the time. I suppose that maybe I should have been like him and his mom and been braver. Oh well, it was the only thing I knew to do at the time and maybe it was a good thing I didn't tell him. I don't know.

See, I guess parenting can be a game of pretending you know what you're doing when you don't.

****(****)****(****)****

Thanks Blaine.  
Carole wanted me to remind you guys about next weekend. I would have called Kurt, but I know he's busy. Since I was sending this to you, I figured I'd remind you guys.

_Forget what I said about editing. I'm blown away Burt. I hope your realize how much I admire you for doing this. I know it isn't easy. _  
_By the way, Kurt said next weekend is great for you and Carole to come out. _  
_-Blaine_

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	3. Chapter 3

_**A/N: I'm slightly nervous about this chapter and I hope it's taken the way it's written. Burt is trying to be as honest as possible.**_

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Before I go on, I should probably tell you about myself. My name's Burt Hummel and I own a tire shop in Lima, Ohio. I grew up in Lima and didn't see much reason to leave the place. All the kids I knew wanted to get out and not be a Lima loser. I didn't care. I didn't need a big city or a fancy college, not like I could get into one anyways. My brother, Andy did. He went away to Ohio State and moved to Columbus right after he got his degree. He once asked me if I regretted staying in Lima and I never did. I wouldn't have met Kurt's mom or had Kurt if I would've left. I'm a simple guy, I don't need a big city to be happy.

Lima was a different town back then. It's not like it is now, built up with coffee shops and shopping malls. Back then, people really did feel like Lima was a place for losers cause there was nothing really there to do. I knew I was average. Had known that since I was five. My dad worked on an assembly line until he retired and my mom was a nurse. They both worked a lot, my dad pulling four on, one off shifts and my mom working the third shift most times at the hospital. Andy and I barely saw them both at the same time, and I guess I was raised by part-time parents and the guys on the football team.

Being influenced on how to be a _man_ by 22 teenage guys is probably not the best idea. Got my first condom at 13, first sexual encounter with a girl at 14 and lost my virginity at 15 to a blonde, senior cheerleader. I was stupid and all I remember was fumbling around in the backseat of her car until it was over. It wasn't at all like I had expected. Yeah, it had felt good, but not like what the other guys were talking about. It wasn't til Kurt's mom that I understood what them guys meant.

Anyways, when my parents left Lima and moved to Kentucky to retire, I stayed. Lima was home to me. Plain and simple. I'm not a man who likes change. I'll stay in Lima until they put me in a box six feet under. Everything I know is here. It's where I belonged and frankly, I knew I wasn't ever going to make it anywhere else. When I bought stock in the tire store and then took it over, this was it for me. I guess you could say that I made my mark. I know Lima's just a town to get out of for some people. Like Kurt. He had big dreams and he was smart. He didn't belong in Lima. He wasn't like his old man.

There were times when I felt like living in Lima limited Kurt. He was talented and I bet he could've had better chances if we lived in Los Angeles or New York City, but I couldn't give that to him. He was just as good as any kid out there, you know?

I admit that there were times when it was hard to get by. Kurt never knew that and he didn't need to. I was the dad. It was my job to provide for him. We got by. I worked over time at the tire shop, I even kept it open a few extra hours on Saturdays. For all the time I spent working, I think I missed part of Kurt's life. He somehow turned from my little boy into this teenager. He was different and all of a sudden I had to learn how to communicate with him all over again.

But there was something different about him and when I looked at him, I had his mom's voice in my head. "You _will_ love him and treat him the same no matter who he ends up loving." I promised her I would, and I could never stop loving my son. He was my _son_. But the treating different, I had to get used to that. As horrible as it sounds now, it's true. I had to get used to a lot of things. I had to get used to the fact that he could be _gay_. That was terrifying. All I'd ever know about gay dudes was they were prissy and liked to flail around their hands with limp wrists. These _men _liked to do pussy stuff like get their hair done and wear skimpy outfits. Those _men_ weren't **men**.

I was an ignorant guy back then. I thought that gay men were like the dudes you see on TV with those tiny shorts with the ass cheeks cut out. The men who dressed up like women. These were what I thought every gay man was. I didn't want my son to be like that. I didn't want my son to parade around the streets in rhinestone tank tops saying things like "fabulous" and crying whenever he broke a nail. I wanted a manly son. A son who I could relate to. I guess that's what it came down to. I wanted a son who was like me.

Did I have a bit of internalized homophobia? You beat your ass I did. I loved my son, don't get me wrong. I would have laid down in front of a train for him, but I had prayed that he would grow out of this phase or whatever it was. And I'm not a religious man. Yes, I was proud of him for not being afraid to be himself, but a part of me wanted a son who liked girls. It wasn't fair to Kurt, but it was what I thought. I could tell him about girls and pregnancy and all that stuff. At the time, the worst my mind could imagine was him and some dude kissing and it did make me ill.

It was never Kurt's problem. It was mine. I needed to look at myself and see why the hell I had such a problem with it. I needed to just fucking suck it up and accept that homosexuality may very well be a part of my life from then until, well until life was over. That's the key I think. Your child can't change who they are, you have to change for them.

******(****)****(****)******

From: **Blaine Anderson**  
Subject: Hey Burt  
To:

Hey Burt,

I'm sorry I didn't have time to mail your chapter back to you yet. I had to go meet a client out near Fire Island of all places, but I wanted to get back with you. Your honesty is just so compelling. I would have never guessed that you were even the least bit homophobic and it really took me aback when I read that. I know you weren't too keen on the idea of writing this in the first place, but I have to say again that I'm so very glad you are.

Tell Carole thanks for e-mailing me the recipe for that chicken dish she made when you guys were here. It was great to have you guys over. I know it was a nice break for Kurt to hang out with you. We're hoping to get back to Lima soon and see you guys and Finn once things settle down here.

Take care!

Blaine

Blaine Anderson  
NCTA Law Firm

_This message is sent from the personal e-mail address of Blaine Anderson. Its message is confidential and intended only for the addressee._

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	4. Chapter 4

I always felt bad that Kurt had to learn to grow up so fast. Not just when his mom died, but cause of all the bullshit he had to face at school. Starting high school is tough for most kids, but for a kid like Kurt it was probably hell. He didn't tell me much about his first year at McKinley. I figured if it was important, he would've told me. I probably should have talked to him more that year, but the kid had been through so much already, you know? I wanted him to have a life. I wanted him to have privacy. I wanted him to feel like he could keep his own life to himself without me interfering.

Looking back, I probably should've talked to him more. Found out what was going on. He never told me about the bullying that year. At the time, I probably would've told him everyone gets bullied. It's like a rite of passage or something. It was part of high school. I know I said the word _fag_ struck me, but I guess it didn't _affect_ me because I continued to believe that my son was straight. Just because he didn't like sports and he dressed nice for a kid his age, didn't mean he was like _them_. I figured some dudes just liked to wear bowties.

Besides, Kurt had started coming into the garage a couple days after school to help out. The kid mainly worked in the office, filling away old purchase orders, answering phones and taking payments. I would slip him $50 or $100 a week depending on how much he worked. I figured he'd save it up and hopefully use it to take some girl out on a date.

I think the guys at the tire store liked having him around too. They used to call the kid Kurt Cobain cause he was creative and I think they couldn't come up with something better for Kurt. Some guys still call him that. Kurt's mom used to call him Kurtie around the house, but anyone else, I swear that kid had his mom's ability to just give you a look that would bring you to your knees.

Kurt was and is still so much like his mother. I wish she could have been there for him. I wish she could have seen him grow up. She's the one who carried him for 9 months. She deserved to see him grow up. She had a right to. And not only that, but I wish she could've been there with me. Half the time I felt like I was walking around with my head up my ass, trying to figure out what Kurt needed me to be. To do for him.

Anyways, it wasn't until Kurt started the 10th grade that I _knew_ he was _gay_. Kurt's mom always talked about paternal instincts and how sometimes you just knew. I thought it was some new age crap she read in a book. I mean I had hunches about things. Like when I knew he was lying to me or he did something he shouldn't of. But instinctively knowing my kid was _gay_? That never was something that I just _knew_. I had suspected, but I guess part of me just didn't want to face it. _I _didn't want to see it.

Like I said, I had a bit of homophobia. You know, I was one of those dad's who was okay with it until it was their kid. My kid. Did my kid even know he was gay? Did he know what that meant? Kurt wasn't stupid, he probably could go on the internet and find out. I don't know. I never asked him. All I knew was when I had been in 10th grade I knew all about girls and was hitting 2nd and 3rd base with them. And I wondered if he had done _stuff_ with a guy yet.

Then there was the time when I walked into his room to see him in a dance tard thing. And there it was. That was the moment I _knew_, I mean I _really_ knew that Kurt was gay. Of course he made up some bullshit answer trying to appease me. He even told me he was on the football team. My kid. I don't know why I played along, but I did. I knew the truth, but I let him play it out. I went to his game and watched him score the winning point and all the while I _knew_. That night when he told me he was gay, call it _divine intervention_ or _an awakening_ or whatever the hell, but I had been so proud of my kid. All the shit, all the homophobia, all the feelings I had disappeared and all I saw was my son. My little boy. Kurt Hummel. The child I helped make. I don't go to church, haven't stepped foot in one since my wife died, but I do believe that there's a God and maybe it's just me rambling, but I think Kurt's mom was with me then. She'll always be a part of me. Sometimes I think that she is there whispering in my ear to stop thinking like that dumb high school kid I was and start thinking like a dad - to man up.

So, Kurt was gay. I was his dad and I didn't know what the heck that meant for his future. Gay dudes got AIDs, gay dudes have lots of sex, gay dudes get the shit beat out of them. That's what I had always seen. The one gay guy in my high school got the crap kicked out of him and I think he died of AIDS later. I didn't want that to happen to my son. I was alive in the 80s, I saw the news reports. My mom used to talk about the _gay cancer_. I knew that when Kurt was in high school, there had been a lot of changes from the 1980s til 2010. But it still scared the hell out of me. All I could think about was my mom talking about a gay guy who came into the hospital and died a week later from this new disease. He told my mom that he only slept with one dude.

That couldn't happen to Kurt. _I _couldn't handle it if anything happened to him. He's the best thing I ever did in my life. But I had to just trust him. I tried. He had joined that glee club at school, had friends. I figured that despite everything else, he was doing okay. I guessed that he was finally fitting in somewhere. He seemed happy. I think he was happy. I wish I could say that his time at McKinley had been fine. But I can't. Kurt went through a lot of shit. Shit that he tried to protect me from.

But it wasn't his job to protect me. It was my job to protect him. Parents should protect their kids. Plain and simple.

****(****)****(****)****

**Blaine - **

**Carole wanted me to thank you for the photos you sent her. And any time you and Kurt want to come to Lima, just give us a buzz. I talked to Finn the other day and he's thinking about taking a job near Pittsburgh. Tell Kurt to give him a call.**

**Thanks for the e-mail and don't worry about trying to rush through these, kids. **

**- Burt**

_Hey Burt,_

_I've got some vacation time coming in a month. I just have to clear the rest of my cases off my desk. It'll be nice to be back in Lima for a week or two. Just got to pull Kurt away from his job. You know how he gets! _

_Kurt gave Finn a call a few days ago. He's coming up to see us with the wife and kids. I'll send you guys pictures._

_You continue to blow me away with your honesty. I hope you realize how profound I find your writing._

_-Blaine_

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	5. Chapter 5

I've noticed that through the years people tend to think I'm dumb or ignorant cause I run a tire store and I don't have a college degree. They think I'm just some backwoods dude who can't hack it. It's true that I made it out of high school with a C average, but I did get an education. I knew that I was never going to be a doctor or lawyer or something that takes high test scores. But I'm proud of my life. I worked really hard at it.

I always worried that Kurt would see me like that. I wanted him to be proud of our lives. I wanted him to be proud of the Hummel name. You know, I always told him no one pushed the Hummel's around. I think he tried to live up to that. Maybe it backfired on me. He kept the bullying, the shoving, the _threats _he got from a punk ass kid at school from me. He told me that things were okay, until he was forced to tell me the truth.

I guess it probably really started to get bad when Kurt joined that glee club. That club was probably the best and worst thing that ever happened to him. He was a talented kid. I always knew that. Before Kurt's mom passed away, Kurt used to put on these little shows with her in the living room and invite me to be their audience. I swear the kid could sing better than half the people on the radio even when was only 4. I always felt terrible that he stopped doing that after she was gone. I never told him, but I missed those moments with him. I loved to watch him and his mom have fun together.

There were times when I wanted to ask Kurt what he remembered about his mom. If he remembered what she smelled like - she liked this lilac perfume that she bought at the department store, if he remembered her voice or the color of her eyes. Now I'm not much of a romantic or sentimental guy, but those are the things I remember about her. To this day I still remember everything about her.

Kurt never really talked about his mom when he was growing up. He still doesn't. And he's so much like her, you know?

Anyways, he never told me about the _slushie facials _or the dumpster tosses or the piss balloons until he was already graduated from McKinley. I did know about the lawn furniture and that's only because it was nailed to the damn roof. If I would've known about all the other crap when he was going through it, then maybe things would've been different.

But Kurt was good at hiding things. He told me that the lawn furniture was a joke. All the jocks were doing it to everyone's houses. I don't know why I believed that crap. But I did.

I always wondered if the reason he didn't tell me was cause of the time I found a box of those tiara's in his room. I admit it probably wasn't the best move on my part, but I didn't know how else to react. I found a fucking box of _girl_ tiara's in his room. Not crowns, but actual tiaras with jewels and junk on them. At the time he hadn't come out to me. Didn't tell me he was gay. So finding those _things_ in his room was more than I could handle. All I could think at the time was my son wanted to be a freakin' girl. He wanted to prance around in tiaras and dresses and be a _girl_. So I took them and put them in the attic and waited for him. And when I confronted him about it, he didn't say anything. He just sat there. Then I took away his car. The car I bought him for his 16th birthday. This car was way too expensive then I could afford, but I got it for him anyways cause it was a _manly_ car. It was a _dude_ car. At the time, I guess I was probably stupid in thinking that a car could make him straight. So here was my son with a car made for a _man_ with a damn box of tiaras under his bed.

Did he wear those god-damned things? Did he pretend that he was some beauty queen? Did he freakin' parade around in one in his bedroom? Why the hell did a 16 year old boy need a box of tiaras?

And yeah, I reacted. I was embarrassed.

But I got over it. It wasn't over night, but I thought of my wife. Thought of the incident in the toy store and that bike. She would've probably kicked me in the balls if she saw what I had done.

Like I said, that all happened before he came out to me. Not that him having tiaras didn't bother me a bit after I found out. There was so much about kids and sex and shit that I didn't know about. When I was growing up all I knew was there was gay dudes and there were straight dudes. After he told me he was gay, I did a little Googling and stopped. There were all these sites about transsexuals, transvestites, bisexual, asexual, polysexual, pomosexual, pansexual. metrosexual and so many other terms. I kept thinking that I had no flipping idea what my world had just opened up to.

But what scared me the most were videos of those idiots picketing gay kid's funerals and carrying signs and banners. The assholes who thought they had a right to be on this Earth over my kid. Now at the time I wasn't ready to go out in the streets and wave a rainbow flag around, but I did know that no one had a right to say that my kid didn't have as much right to a happy life as they did. Those people who use the Bible and God and religion to outcast my son. All I could think of at the time was a verse the minister read at my wife's funeral:

"Therefore, accept one another, just as Christ also accepted us to the glory of God."

I ain't a religious man, but I do know that Kurt was a gift to his mom and me.

******(****)****(****)******

**Blaine -**

**Kurt e-mailed me your flight info. Do you need me to come pick you guys up at the airport? **

**You know, I'm not used to talking about my feelings. So I hope this isn't shit.**

**Burt**

_Burt,_

_I think Kurt and I are going to rent a car while we're out there. My mom wants us to stay with her and my dad while we're out there. So we'll see how that goes._

_Kurt and I have talked about his mom a couple of times and I do know he is proud of her and you. I don't know if it's worth anything, but I'm proud of you for admitting everything you have._

_Take Care,_

_Blaine_

* * *

A/N: The above quote is from Romans 15:7. Also thank you so much for all the comments! I am SO blown away by you guys' response :D

Images can be found here: anisalee(.)livejournal(.)com(/)15823(.)html#cutid1

Reviews are great! :D


	6. Chapter 6

Okay, so I had a gay kid. That I could handle. _Sort of_. Kurt liked boys. That I understood. He was attracted to boys.

He wanted boys _sexually._ That was going to take some time to get used to.

Two dudes. Together. Not something I wanted to think about at the time. Or ever. But then, what parent wants to think of their child doing it?

I guess it was just coming to gripes with everything. That my boy was _different_. But we were doing okay. I had come to the conclusion long before that Kurt and me were it. Kurt was my only priority. One time Andy asked me why I never went out with anyone. He thought I was lonely and needed a woman around for Kurt. Even my parents thought I needed a woman in my life. Like we weren't doing good on our own. But we sure as hell were. I provided for my son. I got him everything he wanted, including those Marc and Jacobs stuff. No one was going to tell me that I couldn't hack it for my kid.

Then Kurt introduced me to Carole. She was great and yeah I had a good time talking to her, but I also wondered why Kurt introduced me to her in the first place. Was this his way of telling me that he needed more than me? You know, I tried to be there for all his needs. And yeah, there wasn't a woman around for him, but we were doing good.

So, at Kurt's insistence, I gave Carole a call and took her out. If Kurt felt that we needed a woman in our lives, then I was going to try for him. If he felt like _I _wasn't enough, then I sure as hell was going to try.

After my wife died, I never thought I'd love any woman again. Kurt's mom was just special, you know? She made me want to be better. She was the mother of my kid. If that asshole driver hadn't killed her, I know we would've been together. Maybe she could've helped me handle Kurt. Maybe she would've bought him a tiara to put in that box with the rest of them.

But then there was Carole. She was beautiful and kind and I started to fall for her. And she was great with Kurt. She didn't judge him, didn't want to change him. She just accepted him. You know, I started to feel bad cause Andy and my mom had told me that's what Kurt needed. Maybe I was just being _pigheaded_ (as Kurt's mom used to say), but maybe this was good for Kurt. He was kind of _effeminate_, not that my kid isn't a man cause he is. He's a Hummel and he's more man then I'll ever be. Maybe he just needed that in his life.

Then I met Finn, Carole's son. And there was a dude I could understand. He reminded me of myself at 16. He was on the football team and dating the head cheerleader. I got that. That was territory I was used to. Finn was like me - average grades, liked sports and liked _girls_. Like I keep saying, I love my son more than anything and am proud that he is my son, but Finn _is_ the son I imagined I'd have.

I know he thought I was the dude trying to replace his dad, but it wasn't like that. I even told him that. I could never be his dad, just like Carole could never be Kurt's mom. But I wanted a chance to be something to Finn. And yeah, he started to come around. I took him to ball games and watched football on TV. It was fun. I could hang out with Finn and know that he wasn't going to talk about something I didn't know. He wasn't going to talk about which white color paint I liked better when they all looked the damn same. He wasn't going to expect me to know who Patti LuPone, Mimi Marquez, or Alexander Mick Queen something or other. It was nice. I admit, it wasn't the best thing to do, but I took Finn places more than Kurt. I wanted to hang out with a kid who was _easy _to be around. And Finn was.

We'd go to a ball game and eat hotdogs with mustard and relish, gulp soda and chug down buckets of popcorn and peanuts. Kurt was so into healthy food crap, that even the mention of the word _hotdog_, made the kid cringe. But Finn didn't care. We'd get a couple Coney's and load up. We did _guy stuff _that I always thought Kurt and I would do when he was a baby.

I guess I just got carried away with Finn. He didn't grow up with a dad and I was there. Sometimes I wondered how the world worked. Carole raised a straight guy on her own, while I raised a gay son. I guess what they say about nurture making a kid gay is wrong, you know?

But, I didn't realize that me hanging out with Finn would suck so much for Kurt. I thought Kurt was fine. His grades were good, there were no more lawn furniture incidents and he seemed to really like Carole. So yeah, I thought things were okay. Then he asked me about Mellencamp and I caught him in his room with that dim blonde cheerleader. I know what I walked in on and for a split second I was relieved. I read online that some kids are just confused and they _experiment_. Maybe being gay was a phase or a way to deal with his mom's death.

Then he went and sang that "Rose's Turn" song. And he was amazing to watch. The kid was really talented. He was so great up on that stage. But there was something else. I may not know a lot about musicals or stuff like that, but I _knew_ that my kid was not okay. When he told me that _I_ broke his heart ad he would work to make it okay for _me_, it stopped me cold. It was _not_ his job to make it okay. It was mine. As I held him in my arms, my heart broke. My child was in pain and it was my fault.

Like I told him that day, it was his job to be himself. It was my job to love him. It was my job to make it okay.

So, I spent all my time trying to make it alright for him. I made it my mission to make sure he never felt that way again. And I worked on myself. I was going to make this okay. I was going to make it better then okay. We were Hummel's.

****(****)****(****)****

**Blaine -**

**Carole and me had a good time with you guys last week. Maybe next time you can stay longer. Carole has pictures that I think she said she was e-mailing you. And she's already talking about taking you guys up on your suggestion to go on a cruise next summer. **

**How did things go at your folks? Kurt didn't really tell me much. He just said it went as expected.**

**Hang in there kid.**

**Burt**

_Burt,_

_We had a blast being back in Lima. I never thought I'd say this, but I actually missed Breadstix and the Lima Bean. Tell Carole I got the photos. Also, tell her to start packing her sunscreen, and don't worry about the cost or anything. It's going to be our treat to you guys! _

_Things with my parents went as expected (like Kurt said). My dad refuses to acknowledge that Kurt and I are partners. It's okay, though. I'm used to it. I know he loves me as his son, he just refuses to accept that I'm gay. He thinks one day I'll mee the "right girl." It's not ideal, but that's how it is at my house. It doesn't matter. _

_I just landed a bigger client, so it may take me a while to get this back to you._

_Take care,_  
_Blaine_

**From: Burt Hummel**  
**Subject:**  
**To: Blaine Anderson**

**Blaine -**

**It matters. YOU matter. I hope you realize that kid.**

**Burt**

* * *

IMAGES: anisalee(.)livejournal(.)com(/)15941(.)html#cutid1

I cannot say thank you thank you thank you enough! I so appreciate all your comments and words of support! It means so much!

I would love to see more reviews tomorrow :D :D :D


	7. Chapter 7

I'm a laid back guy. I usually don't really care what Kurt does as long as it's not a threat to his health or his well being. I didn't care if he had "sleepover's with the girls," or drove out to Columbus for that "Sound of Music" sing-along with Mercedes. I trusted the kid. He had his mom's common sense and morals. And when I surprised myself and asked Carole to move in with us, I figured I'd treat Finn the same way.

Carole had told me about Finn's situation. The guy had thought he'd gotten his girlfriend pregnant and her parents kicked her out. I'd had buddies in that same situation. They just got themselves in too deep and had to man up. But apparently Finn's girlfriend had lied to him or something. It sounded like one of them soap opera shows that Kurt's mom used to watch. All I know is that I'd probably never have to go through that with Kurt.

So, we moved Finn into Kurt's bedroom. I had a long conversation with the kid beforehand. I didn't want Kurt thinking that I didn't care what he thought. But he agreed. He was almost too happy about it. I found out the real reason later on, but at that time I just thought that my kid was moving on with his life. And that was healthy, right?

Things with Carole were going great and I thought that Kurt and Finn were getting along okay. I mean, Finn was one of those new type of dudes. His mom raised him right. Carole was so accepting of Kurt and I figured she raised her son to be like that too. Finn didn't seem like he cared. I mean, yeah, the guy was kind of just thrown into this house, but he didn't say anything. And I was proud of Kurt too. He cleared out half his room for Finn without complaining to me once. This is a kid who got upset if something was put in the wrong place. But he just sucked it up and went along with it voluntarily.

For the first time in a long time, the house felt complete. I'd always felt bad that Kurt took over a lot of the house duties. I was shit at cooking. I'd never had to do that before. The most experience I had in the kitchen was heating up a hotdog in the microwave, making already prepared meals or popping open a can of pasta. I tried to make a chicken one time, but it turned out to be completely frozen. Of course Kurt wanted to eat something more than food out of a freaking can or box. So, he took over the kitchen duties. That should've been my job, but I was lost and the kid seemed to have a knack for it.

But when Carole moved in, Kurt didn't have to do that anymore. He could be a teenager. Sure, it was awkward. Carole liked to make things like cheeseburgers, fries, tater-tots, and steak. Kurt was used to making stuff like roast chicken and green asparagus or something like that. The kid was a trooper and made attempts to eat what she put out for him.

And I never realized that I missed having someone to sleep next to, missed having someone to love. It felt like we were finally okay, but we weren't.

There are certain things I won't tolerate in my house. Lying, disrespect and hate. My house is a safe place and needs to be one for my son. When Andy's family came to visit when Kurt was 9, my little punk nephew called my kid a sissy after Kurt had fallen off the slide in the backyard and started to cry. I looked at Andy and told him to take his kid and leave. Andy's my brother and I love him, but Kurt's _my _son. And yeah, things between me and Andy were shaky for a while, but I needed to protect Kurt from that sort of crap.

My house was Kurt's home. It's the one place where he had a right to feel comfortable, protected, _safe_. Later on, when I found out all the shit Kurt went through, I think one of the best things I ever did for him was making sure that the house was the one place he could go without being judged or bullied. Or at least I hoped it was. Maybe one day I'll ask him.

Out of everyone, I understood that it could be hard to just accept that my kid was gay. I struggled with it for years. You ask yourself questions like is it my fault and did I do something wrong. I know I asked myself those questions. But it's not anyone's fault and it's not something that could ever be wrong. It just is. Kurt was born that way. Plain and simple. It was already decided before he came out of his mom. But yeah, I get how it's scary to _just_ accept something you don't understand.

But that's never an excuse for hatred. Ignorance is not an excuse to hate. Yeah, there are things I don't understand about being gay. And I asked questions, tried to get information and sometimes it wasn't always taken the right way. Kurt got defensive and didn't understand that I was asking him a simple question. He took it that I was trying to argue with him or whatever.

Kurt once told me that people should _just_ get it. Get him. But sometimes the world doesn't work that way. Sometimes you got to be there and educate people, even if it's just lead by example or being honest about yourself. Even if it's not your job. Sometimes, in order for people to understand, you need to help educate them by not being afraid to just be yourself. By not being afraid to be who you were born to be. You know? By living your life the best you can. We all end up teaching lessons whether we want to or not. I told him that you just be yourself and you are teaching people that you are just as valuable as them. That you deserve to live just as much as them. I don't know. Maybe I'm completely wrong, but that's how I see it. You keep trying and you keep living and maybe one day the world will be different.

Like with Finn. The dude I thought was this _new dude_ who just got it. The damn kid screamed the word _fag _in my house. At my son. I don't tolerate that. When I looked at Kurt, tears in his eyes, I knew I had to do something. They both tried to fucking back-track. Making up some excuse for it. But there isn't an excuse for saying that word in my house. And yeah, I told Finn that I used the word the same way he did. I was punk ass kid who spouted that word off like it was nothing. I never realized how hateful it was until I got into junior college and a guy on the football team came out and explained to me why that word was more than just another word for stupid or dumb or sissy. And I was fucking furious. I couldn't believe that a guy like Finn could say that. That a dude like Finn could come into _my_ house and eat _my_ food and live in _my _son's bedroom and spit that sort of hate.

I kicked Finn out. As much as I was starting to love Carole, if she didn't understand, than we'd never work. Kurt didn't need to be surrounded with that. He needed to live in a place that wasn't vile or hateful. He needed to know that _**our**_ house wasn't going to be full of that.

Kurt wasn't home when Carole and Finn moved out. Maybe it had happened too fast and we moved too quickly. When I asked Kurt about it, he shrugged and told me that I didn't have to make them move out. But I did.

Then that damn glee club and Schuester did something I couldn't. They taught Finn that it wasn't okay to pick on Kurt and say _that_ word to him just because he was gay. Kurt never told me about anything. He didn't tell me how those damn football punks cornered him when he they were doing some Baby Gaga or Lady Jiggy – that woman who called people animals – songs and it was Finn who stepped in. I guess he was wearing a red rubber dress when he did it. It was Finn who told me years later.

Maybe I'm wrong and just blowing smoke out of my ass. I don't know.

******(****)****(****)******

**Blaine –**

**Hope you are doing good!**

**Thanks –**

**Blaine**

From: "Blaine Anderson"

Subject: Hey

To: "Burt Hummel"

Hi Burt,

One of my cases just went to court, so I'm working almost all the time. Which is good, but it seems like I'm working 20 hour days (it's more like 12). By the time I get home at night, Kurt's already sound asleep. I don't think we've seen each other more than a few hours in the last couple of weeks, but we're doing good. I'm glad we had those weeks in Lima because we really needed it. Also, our lease is up next week and we're thinking about moving closer to my office. I'll keep you updated on that.

I appreciated the e-mail you sent me. I'm sorry that I haven't gotten around to responding, but honestly it doesn't matter. I'm okay. Even if my father doesn't understand, I have Kurt and that's all I need.

Kurt "accidentally" saw part of this chapter. I know he's dying to read this. He told me to tell you that he knows what you did for him and he said that your house was probably one of the only places he felt safe at that time. I've forwarded part of the e-mail he sent to me. (I was at a meeting in the Berkshires when he saw it).

I'll get this back to you as soon as I can.

Take care,  
Blaine

Blaine Anderson  
NCTA Law Firm

_This message is sent from the personal e-mail address of Blaine Anderson. It's message is confidential and intended only for the addressee. For professional correspondence, please respond to _

- Forwarded message -

**Kurt Hummel-Anderson** wrote:

From: "Kurt Hummel-Anderson"

Subject: MISS YOU!

To: "Blaine Anderson"

Hey babe,

I hope things are going good at your meeting! I'm going out of my mind with work, but I think we're almost ready! (So cross your fingers for me).

You got another package from my dad today and it might have been opened when I pulled it out of the mailbox, and the envelope just might have ripped open and the contents just might have fell out onto the kitchen table. I can't believe how much he's putting into this. He did make the house safe for me and I know he tried. I'm going to give him a call later on, because I know that he did everything he could to make the house feel like a home for me.

* * *

Images: anisalee(.)livejournal(.)com(/)16230(.)html#cutid1

As always, THANK YOU SO SO SO SO much for all your support! :) This chapter was the toughest to write so far, so I hope you enjoy it.

Alerts are great, but I love reviews ;)


	8. Chapter 8

I'm lucky. I'm real lucky. My kid wasn't one of those kids that tried to kill themselves. I never got one of those phone calls saying that Kurt was in the hospital because he had tried to commit suicide. He could have been one of those kids, and that's what scares me. I could have come home from the tire shop and found Kurt and just thinking about that terrifies me. You know, watching the news and seeing those stories of gay kids who killed themselves because of asshole kids and their god-damn bullying. Losing my wife was hell, but there's no way I could imagine what it'd be like if I'd lost Kurt.

For a while that was my biggest freaking fear. I'll always remember that time when Kurt wanted to try out for that song in glee club. My kid wanted a shot and Schuester wasn't going to give him one. I'll tell you, Kurt could sing just as good as any girl. I went into that school the next day. I mean, I pay taxes to these schools and they were going to discriminate against my kid? And yeah I went in there and raised hell and got my kid his try out. Then I got one of _those_ calls. The one's where they say, "Your son's a fag," and hang up. Those calls always terrified me. I usually tried to hide it around Kurt cause I didn't want him to know that some fucking stupid anonymous voice on the phone could shake me up. But it did. It was fuckers like that who forced them gay kids to take their own lives. But Kurt, smart kid, knew. And he blew the try out because of me. The kid was so excited about singing that high c or some letter note and he blew it for me. Do you know how that makes me feel as a dad? As the person who's supposed to protect my boy?

Bullies like that punk on the phone forced my kid to give up something he wanted. And then the shit with Finn. I was fucking terrified that Kurt would take a bunch of pills or pick up a razor blade or even fucking use a rope and end it. He didn't talk much about what happened, even though I asked him. The kid didn't want to talk about anything. He just clammed up and shut himself down in his room. I wanted it to be just because he was teenager. You know? Just some part of the teenage asshole stage.

After a while, Kurt seemed to be doing okay. He was hanging out with his friends, he had those girls from the glee club over and I'd heard them singing in his room. I guess I was just being dumb in thinking that things were getting better. The tire shop was doing good, me and Carole were still dating and Kurt had mentioned that him and Finn had gotten over the shit that went down in his room. So yeah, I thought the Hummel's were doing good.

Then Kurt's junior year at McKinley started. I thought the kid would be alright cause he had been at the high school for a few years already. Some kids may not like the fact that Kurt was gay, but he had that glee club. No one seemed to really care that my kid was as queer as a three dollar bill in that club. So, yeah, I thought my kid was safe at McKinley.

But I was wrong. Kurt didn't tell me about that damn kid Karofsky or all the crap that he was dealing with. I'd ask him how school went and he would just say _fine_. So I thought he was fine. My kid said he was fine. You know those "talk to your kid" commercials they used to run in the 90s? Well, I probably should have listened to them instead of taking _fine_ for an answer. But at the time, I wasn't thinking about that.

Then my body gave out on me and I had a fucking heart attack. I don't remember much about that time, but I do remember it felt like I was being tackled by some huge ass quarterback. It was like I wasn't in my body. Like I was watching myself fall down and the last thing that popped in my mind was Kurt. I don't really have any idea what it was like for Kurt when I was in the hospital. He didn't talk about it much. Well at least he never talked about it to me. Kid is strong, like his mom. He likes to hide things from me to make it better for me. He thinks he's protecting me. But he was just a kid, you know? He didn't need to worry about me.

Anyways, what I do remember from that time is waking up to see my boy sitting next to me. Kurt was freaked out, but then I guess who wouldn't be in that situation? I knew that. Like I've always said, I may be dumb but I'm not stupid. He wanted me to believe that he was okay and everything was under control and I just went along with that. I guess I was just too tired and _sick_ (as the doctors kept calling it). And Kurt was like a "mother hen," making sure I ate healthy, was doing everything the doctor said. He even learned how to give me my IV treatment. I hated that. My kid's job was not to take care of me. He was supposed to be 16. But here he was giving me medicine, helping me to bed and fucking helping me to the bathroom. You know how embarrassing it is for your kid to have to help you walk to the freaking toilet?

But I guess there were some good things that came out of my heart attack. I realized two things when I was a damn invalid in my own house. The first was that I realized I needed to be healthy for Kurt, I wanted to watch my kid grow and maybe have his own family one day. And the second was I had come to accept that I was in love with Carole Hudson. And not only that, but I wanted to marry her. Anyone that knows me can tell you that I don't do things on impulse. I'm not an impulsive guy. But there was just something about Carole. She walked into my life and for some reason she decided to love a guy like me. A simple man with half a junior college education. So, I did one of the most romantic things I'd ever done and asked her to marry me where Kurt first introduced us. I even got down on one knee.

When we told Finn and Kurt, Kurt smiled more than I'd seen in a while. It was nice. And when he got home that night we had a long talk about his mom. Something I probably should have done sooner, but I wasn't ready to, I guess. I'll always remember that conversation. He asked me if I was ready to get married again and I had to make sure he was okay with me bringing another woman into his life. Like I've said before, if it wasn't okay with him, then my relationship with Carole wouldn't work. I probably should have asked him before I asked her.

As happy as I was about getting hitched again, I also found out about that Karofsky kid. Not at first. No, apparently Karofsky had been bullying Kurt for months and no one told me or bothered to help Kurt. Even Schuester knew what was going on, but his ass never once got me on the phone to tell me what was going on with Kurt, _my own kid_. No one thought to tell me shit. You know when I found out anything? It's when that Karofsky kid made that _gesture_ when Kurt was showing me and Finn how to dance for the wedding. Kurt finally told me that punk kid had threatened to kill him. Not just bullied him, but _threatened_ to _kill_ him. How the hell am I supposed to comprehend that? Some stupid high school jock wanted to kill my kid because he was gay. Years later Kurt finally told me everything about that, but at the time it scared me. I lived my life like that punk kid. I thought _fags_ weren't men and that they didn't deserve to call themselves dudes. But we never took it that far. I never thought it would go that far with Kurt. Where the hell did that kid get off? And I acted. What parent wouldn't, right?

Karofsky ended up expelled, and Kurt was more relaxed then I'd seen him. At the wedding, he seemed happy. And me and Carole couldn't believe how much he had done for us. It was a great wedding and it was like we had become a family. I wanted to think that everything was going to be okay. And then the damn school board made the choice to send that Karofsky kid back to McKinley. They didn't even bother to tell me or Kurt. They just decided it.

I knew that I couldn't send my boy back to that. I couldn't receive that phone call saying that my kid was in the hospital. And I knew about that school, Dalton Academy. Kurt had mentioned it a couple times and I knew it was one of those hot-shot schools that cost a ton to send your kid to. But if that's what'd keep him safe, then I'd send him.

So, Carole and me decided that our honeymoon to Hawaii could wait. I'd have to put off seeing the hotel where the cast from "Lost" stayed, but nothing was more important than Kurt. And, we took the money and paid the tuition for Kurt. The start of the new week, Kurt was at Dalton. Yeah, I was scared to send my boy to a place where the kids' fathers made probably double what I did in a year and they all came from families who were rich. I hoped that Kurt would fit in, you know? But I guess it was good to know that he had at least one friend there. Some dude named Blaine.

*******(****)****(****)******

_Hey Burt,_

_My birthday was great. Kurt and I celebrated it last Saturday. We spent the day being tourists and then he took me to dinner and a movie. We've been seeing so little of each other lately, that it was nice to just spend the day with him._

_I also saw my dad. He was up here for a business meeting and wanted to take me out to lunch. It went okay. I know he loves me and that I'm still his son. It could always be worse though. At least he's still part of my life. _

_Thank you for the gifts! I can't believe you guys bought me 10 lbs of Lima Bean coffee beans, a coffee grinder and a coffee maker that actually makes a decent cup of medium drip. I've been playing with it since I opened the box. I think it drove Kurt crazy that I bought coffee at the shop around the corner from our apartment, rather then use his Tassimo machine. He's been warning me all evening that I'm going to break the machine if I keep messing with it so much. _

_Speaking of which, we've decided to resign our lease on the apartment. It was a lot easier than trying to find some place in the span of a few weeks. I really don't even know what we were thinking when we came up with the idea to possibly move. _

_Last week, Kurt took me to see the progress at his job. It's coming along really well. I'm so proud of him. I know he can't wait for you and Carole to come and see. It probably won't be for at least another month, if not longer. I'd send you pictures, but he doesn't want you to see anything but the finished product. _

_I got to admit, I'm a little nervous to see what you first thought about me. I hope it's not too bad! _

_Take care,_

_Blaine_

* * *

Images: anisalee(.)livejournal(.)com(/)16756(.)html#cutid1

A/N: There is an image before Blaine's letter, so if you want to see it please visit the above link :)

Again, can't thank you guys enough for all your support and reviews. I wish FF would let me respond individually! :) But I do read every single one of them and just know it means so much!


	9. Chapter 9

You would think handing over a check of that much money would've been hard, but it was one of the easiest things I'd ever done. Kurt's safety was worth more than my bank account. So, yeah I drove to that fancy school, _The Dalton Academy for Boys_, with Kurt and Carole. We were offered "lattes" and I remember thinking that a cup of coffee from the gas station tasted better to me. The principal explained to me how Kurt would be receiving the finest education and about networking and stuff. He even took us on a tour of the place. The kids seemed nice enough and it seemed like it was probably more Kurt's style. My kid liked nice things and this school seemed like it would be good for him. But all I cared about was if my kid was going to be safe at that place. The guy promised me that Dalton had a policy against bullying.

His first day at that place, I got to admit that I was nervous. We may not have a lot of money, but we were middle class and I'm proud of that. I didn't want no one to mess with my kid just cause his dad was a mechanic. The kid had been given a raw deal in life and it sucks, you know?

But it went okay. He told me that it was a lot better than McKinley. And the kid joined the glee club there, which was a good thing. At least the kids were accepting him.

Then there was that _Blaine_ kid. Kurt mentioned him a few times to me, and I thought it'd pass. Just like that Sam kid. I didn't think much of it. Kurt was always mentioning kids from glee club and stuff. I just thought he was another one. But then Kurt came home with a kid in tow who I'd never seen. He stuck out his hand and told me his name was Blaine. Just _Blaine_. This kid was confident. I could tell. And my first thought was this _Blaine_ was cocky. He was all slick hair and cool acting and I knew his type. They were used to getting what they wanted when they wanted and didn't have to care about the freaking consequences. They didn't know what it meant to _work_ for something. Not like me and Kurt. He probably never had to deal with the shit that Kurt went through. This kid had it easy. He drove a BMW for God sake. But Kurt liked him and I trusted Kurt. I just didn't want this kid judging Kurt cause he didn't come from a family of money or whatever.

After a while, I got used to this Blaine being around a lot. Kurt was always "going to get coffee," or "going to a play," or "hanging out" with Blaine. At first, I didn't see it. Kurt told me Blaine was a friend and that was that. And this Blaine dude was gay. So maybe Kurt needed a gay guy around, who could understand him. I love my son, but I wasn't ready to have the conversation with him about boys and boyfriends. Maybe Blaine could, you know, give him a gay dude to talk to. Talk to him about guys.

Then one weekend, Kurt had even invited Blaine to the McKinley Homecoming game with Carole and me. The kid was polite and nice enough on the drive to the school. He told us about a summer when he spent a month in Greece. Freaking Greece. The kid was so rich that his family spent a month in Greece. The furthest Kurt had been was with his grandma to see a musical in Frankfort. Kurt's mom and me always planned on taking him to Disney World and staying in one of those swanky resorts where the characters had breakfast with the kids. We were going to do that for Kurt's 10th birthday. You know, we had been saving so Kurt could get whatever the heck he wanted when we were there. We were going to get him the best that Disney had. I know the kid would've probably loved it. We ended up using the money on my wife's funeral. I always meant to take him on that trip when I could get enough money. But then he just grew up and it was too late. So, maybe I couldn't freaking give him Disney World, but I did the best damn job I could giving him everything else.

So yeah, I thought Blaine was cocky and arrogant. One of those Ivy League kids. I didn't want Kurt to get hurt. He spent most of his time with Blaine and I didn't want the guy to get bored with my son cause he didn't belong to a country club or exclusive members only thing. It's not that I didn't think Kurt could take care of himself. It's just, he's a passionate guy. He gets hung up on things real quick and doesn't let them go. Like that thing with Finn. Carole told me that Kurt had some sort of crush on Finn last year and wouldn't let it go. Kept pushing the dude for what? I don't know. It made Finn real uncomfortable, like Kurt was trying to pressure him into something. And I was angry when I found out. That's something Kurt should've told me. Kurt was so hung up on people not accepting him that maybe he forgot to accept that guys like Finn weren't interested in anything but being his friend. Maybe my kid needed to learn that no really meant no.

He's like his mom in that way. She was passionate to a point where sometimes she didn't understand that other people didn't feel that way. The woman wasn't perfect, but she was the most amazing woman I'd ever met.

Anyways, there was something about this _Blaine_ that just didn't sit well with me. He was too polite, too confident, acted a little too perfect. Carole told me I was being "silly." Looking back, I guess I was. But I didn't know that then. And if you walked into your son's bedroom with a boy sleeping in his bed, you'd feel the same too. But that's another story for later.

******(****)****(****)******

From: Burt Hummel  
Subject: Away  
To: Blaine Anderson, Kurt Hummel-Anderson

Guys –

Carole and me are going to be in Chicago for the week. Carole has a work thing (some nurses gathering or workshop) and we thought we'd make a weekend out of it. So if you need to get a hold of us, that's where we'll be. I think Carole's going to e-mail you the hotel stuff later.

Blaine – I'm sending you another e-mail.

******(****)****(****)******

From: Kurt Hummel-Anderson  
Subject: Re: Away  
To: Dad, Carole  
CC: Blaine Anderson

Dad and Carole,

Have fun!

Let me know how your appointment at the cardiologist went, Dad – and don't try to pretend that you didn't get this e-mail. I have witnesses and I WILL call Carole.

Love you guys,

Kurt

******(****)****(****)******

From: Dad  
Subject: Re: Away  
To: Hummel-Anderson

Kurt,

The doctor said everything looked healthy. I promise that I'm taking care of myself.

Love you kiddo!

Dad

******(****)****(****)******

From: Burt Hummel  
Subject: Chapter  
To: Blaine Anderson  
Attachment: 1 file (Chapter)

Blaine –

Here's the next part. Take your time. I know you're busy. Also, thanks for the call last week. It's nice to hear from one of you, since Kurt has somehow forgotten how to use his phone.

I know you've got all your clients and cases, but try to take it easy. If that's one thing have a heart problem taught me, it's to not stress out over shit. Also, the cardiologist said the ticker still looks good.

Take care kid. I'll talk to you when Carole and me get back.

Burt

******(****)****(****)******

From: Blaine Anderson  
Subject: Re: Chapter  
To: Burt Hummel

Hey Burt,

Have fun in Chicago!

I'll take a look at this sometime this weekend. I'm just swamped in prepping for court. So I don't have very much time at the moment. I'm sorry this e-mail is so short, but I have a meeting in a few minutes.

Take care,  
Blaine

Blaine Anderson  
NCTA Law Firm

_This message is sent from the personal e-mail address of Blaine Anderson. It's message is confidential and intended only for the addressee.  
_

* * *

A/N: THANK SO MUCH! Your support and feedback means so so so much to me! I read every review I get and I'm just blown away. :D :D Would love to wake up to reviews - it would just make my entire week! :D


	10. Blaine's Interlude

From: Blaine Anderson  
Subject: Re: Chapter  
To: Burt Hummel

Hey Burt,

I read through your chapter and I think I understand better why you treated me the way you did. You never treated me bad, but I always got a feeling that you didn't like me. I remember Kurt telling me that you were fine with me and not to worry. I spent a lot of my time trying to impress you and Carole to like me. It was really important to me that you guys liked me. Even though Kurt and I weren't together at the time, I think I always knew in a way that the Hummel's were going to be a part of my life for a while.

You weren't wrong in saying that I was an Ivy League kid. I never told Kurt, but after we graduated from high school, my dad had Princeton legacy me in. He sat me down and told me that he "strongly urged" me to go to his alma mater instead of going to Ohio State. I think it disappointed him that I choose a public, state university over an Ivy League. Granted, he's never come out and said that, but it was one of his goals for me.

Honestly, I never looked down at you or Kurt – not even for a second. Sometimes I wished that I had more of a normal upbringing. Yes, I know that I did live a privileged childhood and got to do a lot of stuff that kids don't, but sometimes I just wish my parents would have given up going to Greece or Paris or wherever for our summer vacation and taken me to Disney World. To me, going to Disney World would have meant more to me than any of the trips I went on. I don't know if you ever told Kurt that you had planned to take him there, but I think you should. I think just knowing you wanted to give him that magical part of childhood will mean a lot to him.

I know you thought I was just this rich kid coming into Kurt's life and that I didn't belong in his world. In the summers, my parents and I were members of the country club and I did spend a lot of my summers at the pool or in the Hamptons with "friends" (more or less other rich kids who were all stuck together). However, I would have chosen to hang out with Kurt and your family any day. You guys were normal for me and your relationship with Kurt was something I admired, I still do. As much as my dad gave me materialistic wise, sometimes I just wanted to be able to talk to him, but our relationship was never like that. I don't know if it will ever be like that.

Anyways, I hope you and Carole had a good time in Chicago. It's nice that you two were able to get away.

Take care,

Blaine

Blaine Anderson  
NCTA Law Firm

_This message is sent from the personal e-mail address of Blaine Anderson. Its message is confidential and intended only for the addressee. _

******(****)****(****)******

_A/N: Yeah for not posting at 11PM (which seems to be a trend with me!) :D I just want to say thank you so much to everyone for commenting. Regular chapters should resume sometime this weekend._

___Like it? Comment, rec, link :) _  



	11. Chapter 10

There were times when I had no clue what I was doing. Raising Kurt was no easy ride and half the time I felt like I was just barely hanging on. He was a kid who was just so far off from what I'd known my entire life. You know, raising a gay son wasn't something I thought I'd have to do. But I learned and accepted. I wasn't ready to talk about boys or whatever, but I was okay with it. Better than okay. He was my son and I loved him. I never thought I'd ever love him as much as I do.

So yeah, I wasn't ready to even talk about the possibility of boys. I wanted him to be happy, but I still needed to work on that part. And then I found_ that_ Blaine in my son's bed. I had no idea how the hell to handle that. All I knew was there was a boy in my son's bed. Another gay boy in my gay son's bed. And then there was Kurt acting like nothing was wrong. Of all the things I could have walked in on, I opened the door to see a boy in my son's bed. A boy who had obviously slept in my son's bed over night with _him_. I'd let Kurt have Mercedes and Rachel over in his room and I knew that him and Mercedes shared his bed sometimes. But that was okay with me. I knew that Kurt didn't play for that team. Even when he was in the basement with that daffy cheerleader, I think in the back of my head I knew that he wouldn't do anything with her.

It was different with Blaine. I could see it in his eyes when he talked about the guy. Then he was in Kurt's bed. What the hell am I supposed to think? You know them deer in the headlights sayings? That was me. All I could think of was to get out of that room. I remember a little while later, Blaine trying to slip out unnoticed. Like I hadn't seen him in the bed. He didn't say anything to me. Just turned his head down and left. Kid didn't even have the decency to look me in the eyes.

And then Kurt told me about the drinking party that they all went to. I thought my boy was smarter than that. After the shit that went down last year at McKinley when he puked on that guidance counselor. I couldn't believe it. I remember Principal Figgins calling me at the tire shop and telling me they had taken Kurt to the ER because he had been blasted. And when I walked into the hospital and saw him looking wrecked, I lost it. My kid was smarter than that. I don't know what would've happened if no one at that damn school had noticed. My kid probably would've gotten into his car and drove, and who the hell knows what would've happened then.

But then I found out it was Blaine who had been drunk. So fucking drunk that he had to be brought to my house cause he got so hammered that he couldn't even stand on his own. This was the kid my son wanted to get involved with - a guy who didn't give a shit about getting so wasted his friends had to drag his ass home with them.

After that, I didn't see much of that Blaine. I mean, the kid had practically become a fixture in my house and then he just wasn't there. I was glad. My kid didn't need that kind of influence around him, you know? The kind that went to parties and thought it was cool to drink at 17. I'm not saying I never did that, but I was stupid. This Blaine put on an act that he was this better kind of dude. Some guy who was a gentleman and was better because he came from money.

Then Kurt told me that Blaine might not play for his team after all. I don't know a lot about that stuff, but I thought once someone came out of the closet that was kind of it, you know? Kurt had explained to me that coming out was like a process and I guess I didn't understand and from the looks of it, my boy didn't quite get it too. And I thought that maybe this Blaine was just some sort of jackass who was using my kid as an experiment. You know, my kid wasn't some sort of gay try out. He was a person. A talented, amazing, fucking incredible kid.

But my kid was also a teenager who I caught with a maybe gay dude in his bed and I couldn't let that go. So I told Kurt that he wasn't allowed to have any inappropriate sleepovers in the house. What else was I supposed to do? Me and Carole wouldn't let Finn have a girl in his bed with him, and we sure as hell weren't going to treat Kurt different just cause he was gay. But between all this crap, Kurt said something that I didn't want to think about. He asked me to learn about _gay_ sex. And God-damn, I didn't want to have that conversation with him. I mean sex with a girl is one thing. I knew the mechanics and where stuff went. But dudes? Kurt dragged me to that _Brokeback Mountain_ movie and I know that something went down in that tent. I mean there was spit, and hands and grunting. I'm pretty sure I know_ what_ happened, but it just seemed weird. A couple buddies of mine talked about doing it _that_ way with their girls, but the great thing about being with a woman is _being_ with a woman. Or at least that's what I think.

I guess that gay dudes don't have many options in that department. I just didn't want to think about my son doing _that_. Or having any sort of sex at all. I mean the kid looked like he was 10 at 17.

But, I'd do anything for Kurt. So, I drove to the free clinic on the other side of Lima. I didn't know what I was doing there. I couldn't think. I remember I told the nurse that my son was gay and I needed information when he wanted to become _intimate_ with another boy. I think she thought I wanted the info for myself cause she started asking me all these questions about me. I guess they don't get many dad's in there asking about this stuff for their son's. She gave me four pamphlets on everything. And I do mean everything. I started reading one and I couldn't keep going. So, I stashed them in the glove box of my truck. I didn't want to deal with the mechanics and explaining to my son what the hell to do. But I was going to force myself to in time. I was a man. I was a Hummel. I could do that.

Then Blaine started coming around again. I never knew what went down. Kurt just told me something about Rachel Berry's kiss proving that Blaine was gay. I didn't like it, but Kurt must've seen something in Blaine that I didn't. So, for the time being I dropped the whole "sex talk" thing. Kurt didn't mention it again and I was happy to not have to try and figure out how to tell my kid about gay sex.

******(****)****(****)******

From: Burt Hummel  
Subject: Next Part  
To: Blaine Anderson  
Attachment: (Chapt10)

Blaine –

I talked to Kurt earlier today and he said you went to White Plains or something having to do with a client and that you wouldn't be back for a few days to a week. I thought this would probably be the best way to get this to you.

You know kid, sometimes it just takes a while for a guys to come around to the idea that their son is gay. I guess it was easy for me cause Kurt was all I had. But your dad might just need some more time. I don't think there's a time limit to these things. He needs to work through his stuff. It's not you. You know that I even had issues with stuff related to Kurt being gay that I needed to work through – like your wedding.

So, just hang in there, kid.

Burt

**From: Blaine Anderson**  
**Subject: Re: Next Part**  
**To: Burt Hummel**

**Hey Burt,**

**Thank you. I had a really crappy day and it was nice to read your e-mail. I don't know if my dad will come around, but it's nice to think that one day he might.**

**Reading over your chapter, I remember that party. I really didn't mean to get that drunk. I was going through something and I was 17 and stupid. You know how you told me about Kurt trying to pretend to be straight to impress you? Well, I think that's what I was doing with Rachel. I got drunk because for once I just wanted to let loose and stop being Blaine Anderson, the son of a CEO. I just wanted to be Blaine. I can tell you that it never happened again. I learned from that night and I didn't want to be that drunken mess ever again.**

**Anyways, I probably should go. I have to still give Kurt a call and then I'm going to go to bed.**

**Take Care,**  
**Blaine**

**_Sent from my Blackberry_**

* * *

Sorry for not being able to update :( FF wouldn't let me log on until now.

Thanks for all the feedback. You guys don't know how much it means to me :)

Alerts are great, but comments are great too! :D


	12. Chapter 11

The other day a guy came into the shop needing his tire fixed. I get that sort of customer every day. But this kid was different. He had on one of those blue blazers with a D on it like Kurt used to wear. I knew this kid went to Dalton. I asked him what happened to the car in order to know what the heck I was dealing with. The kid didn't want to tell me. He just clamed up and got this look on his face. Now I'm not a real intuitive guy, but I knew that something happened to this kid. I told him that my son and my son-in-law went to Dalton when they were teenagers. I don't know what I said or if that was what he needed to hear. But he told me that some kids from his old school slashed his tires cause they thought he was gay. They tracked him down to Dalton and screwed with his car. The kid made it real clear he wasn't gay. He just didn't care if someone was. He told me that his best friend was gay and he didn't care if a dude was or wasn't. He even joined this gay/straight club at his old school. And I thought this kid really was a new type of dude. Maybe kids were changing. Or at least kids like this. But there were still punks out there who made this kid leave his school and go to Dalton. And you know, I asked the kid if he ever wished he didn't join that club or was so open about his beliefs. He looked me straight in the eyes and said no. I gave the kid his tire on the house and even changed his oil for free. Kids like him deserve a break. Kids like him are who's going to change the world.

That Dalton is a real good place now that I think about it. They do a good job at that school. Kids there just seem to get it. I didn't really know Kurt's friends from there. I met a couple of the guys in that glee club, the Warblers. But he never really talked about anyone but Blaine. The kid who was loaded with money and booze.

And then one day Blaine showed up at the tire shop. Just looking at him, I figured this kid had it easy. He looked straight. No one would ever just look at him and know. Not like Kurt. And he waltzed into the garage with his slick hair, expensive coat and scarf. I don't know. When I looked at him all I saw was hair gel and a scarf. Money walking. Then he opened his mouth and told me about building a '59 Chevy with his dad. I admit that surprised me. The kid didn't seem like the type who would do something like that. He seemed like the dude who'd have some foreign top of the line car. But I had to know what team he played for. I know that I was probably committing a _faux pas_ or whatever Kurt calls it. And maybe it wasn't the best thing to ask that way. The thing that impressed me was the kid looked me straight in the eyes and said "I am definitely gay." There wasn't any hesitation. And you know what? I started to listen to the kid. He became more than just a helmet of hair running its mouth. I don't know. There was something about this kid. Something I hadn't seen before. As much as I wanted to throw the kid out of the garage for butting in to something that wasn't his business, a part of me agreed with him. And that's what scared me. This 17 year old kid was telling me to man up and talk to my kid about sex.

And he was right.

But I had no idea what I was doing. I knew what Kurt would be doing and what parts went where, but I just had no fucking clue how to actually _say_ it. As much as I love Carole, this wasn't something she could help with. This was something his mom would know what words to say. She would probably take his hand and tell him that he was worth it. How much he mattered. Sex with Kurt's mom wasn't _just_ sex. It was a connection we shared. Afterwards, I think I loved her more than I did. Buddies I knew used to tell me that all they needed was a _good fuck_ to have fun. Sex wasn't something that meant something to them.

That's what I told him. I didn't need those pamphlets to tell him how to actually _do_ it. He just needed to know that he mattered. That he was worth it. I don't know if that was the right thing to do. Maybe I should've given him some condoms or talked about protection. But I wasn't ready to give him that stuff. This is going to sound real shitty, but when he was the only gay kid he knew and I was aware of, I was kind of glad. It meant I didn't have to worry about all that stuff. I thought this would come later. Like when he was away at college.

So that was that. My little boy who used to be so tiny he could fit in just one of my arms was now a man. And I didn't know how I felt about that. One minute I'm playing tea party with him in the backyard and the next he's grown up.

I told that to Carole one night. One second Kurt's 7 and the next he's 17. She just laughed a little and kissed me. "That's what kids do," I remember her whispering.

Kurt was a man and I'd have to get used to that idea. Then almost right after _the talk_, Blaine was coming over to the house a lot more. Kurt and him would sit on the couch in the living room for hours watching movies or hanging out in Kurt's room or somewhere in the house. And Blaine wasn't as bad as I thought. I guess I talk a lot of shit about people judging my boy before they know him, and I was doing the same fucking thing to this kid. So, I tried to be more _okay_ with him being around. I let him stay for dinners and made an effort to talk to him.

And just as I was starting to get used to the idea that one day my son might have a_ sexual life_. My life was once again thrown into some sort of world I didn't know. I felt like them characters on _Lost _when they first got on the island.

I found Blaine and Kurt kissing in Kurt's room. Not just kissing, but making out. I wasn't prepared for anything like that. I wasn't prepared for talks of _boyfriends_ and first loves. I wasn't prepared to give my boy _the talk_ at the insistence of his friend only to have that friend put the damn moves on my kid. But that's where we were.

I guess as a parent, it's not about what you're prepared for or not. It's how you accept and adapt.

******(****)****(****)******

**TEXT: **

**From Burt Hummel:**

**Kurt just called and said you were in the hospital last night. Are you okay? Do you need Carole and me to come out there?**

From: Blaine Anderson  
Subject: I'M FINE  
To: Burt Hummel

Burt,

I'm fine. Kurt was just being overly protective of me. I had some chest pains and Kurt freaked out (although I understand it). We went to the ER and Kurt practically ordered that they give me every test in the book. Turns out it was just some really bad acid reflux from some Mexican take-out I had. They gave me some pills to help avoid that and recommended I eat blander foods for the next couple days. Kurt is making sure that I do! He actually threatened to drag me to a specialist to make sure that the ER doctors weren't missing something. We didn't get out of the hospital until 4AM. Luckily I didn't have court today.

You and Carole shouldn't worry about me. I'm fine.

Take Care,  
Blaine

Blaine Anderson  
NCTA Law Firm

_This message is sent from the personal e-mail address of Blaine Anderson. Its message is confidential and intended only for the addressee._

**From: Burt Hummel **  
** Subject: Re: I'M FINE**  
** To: Blaine Anderson **  
** Attachment: ()**

**Blaine –**

**I'm really glad to hear that. All we got last night was Kurt saying you were in the hospital and something with your chest and heart. Carole tried to call him back, but it kept going to voice mail. Don't scare us like that again, kid. Okay? **

**You listen to your husband. I don't want to get another call like that ever. Carole was just about to get us a flight out to you guys. Take it easy, you hear? And give us a buzz when you're up to it. **

**I also attached the next chapter whenever you get a chance.**

**Burt**

From: Blaine Anderson  
Subject: Re: I'M FINE  
To: Burt Hummel

Hey Burt,

Don't worry about me. I got a junior associate to meet with some of my clients and took the last two days off to appease Kurt. He pretty much forces me to either stay in bed or on the couch. So, I got a chance to just relax and read through your chapter.

I remember going to the tire shop to see you and I was freaking out on the inside. You have to know that I cared about Kurt so much and I just wanted to help him. I know I've told you this before, but at the time I didn't even have romantic feelings for him. He was just purely a friend for me at that point.

You're right that Dalton is a good place. It was the only place I'd ever been to that had a policy on bullying. I know it was a place where Kurt and I both felt safe. That kid you talk about sounds like a great kid.

I don't know if I've ever told this to you, but you're a good man, Burt.

Take Care,  
Blaine

Blaine Anderson  
NCTA Law Firm

_This message is sent from the personal e-mail address of Blaine Anderson. Its message is confidential and intended only for the addressee. _

* * *

_A/N: Sorry again for not being able to update last night. FF was being wonky again! Thank you guys all so so so so (x million) much! I so appreciate all your comments and feedback! _

_Also, I come from the Klaine fandom, so it was just a natural thing for me to put this story in that category. However, for a short time I'm going to put Burt in there as a character so more people outside of the fandom can read it. So in case there's some confusion as to where the story went. I'm always excited to see what new people think of this and I think it'll be interesting to see what those outside of Klaine think too :D - _**Okay scratch that. :/ FF won't change the characters on the published version, only on my version... hmmm... **_  
_

_Also this one does include an image which can be found here: anisalee(.)livejournal(.)com(/)17801(.)html _

_As always comments/recs/PM's/links/alerts/etc are always appreciated!  
_


	13. Chapter 12

When me, Carole, Finn and Kurt moved into the new house, I wanted Kurt to have a real bedroom. The kid had been living in the basement of the old house since he was 13. That's probably why I didn't know what the heck was going on with him at McKinley. He would just sit down in that basement for hours. I didn't know what he was doing down there half the time. But this time was different. I wanted him upstairs where I could keep an eye on him.

He wasn't too happy with it. But you know, it was tough and he'd just have to suck it up. So, we gave him a real nice room with a window that you could see the backyard. And he had the room with a bathroom attached. Finn had to go down the hall to use his.

I know it was hard for the boys at first. Being so different and all. But they learned to deal with it. If you saw them today, you'd swear they were blood-related brothers. They just look out for each other. There was one time when Finn wasn't doing well with money and was facing having his house taken away. Carole and me gave him what we could. But Kurt just called up the mortgage company and forked over everything he owed. There was also that time when Kurt got mugged coming home at night. My biggest fear when Kurt moved to _that_ city so far away from me. Blaine was away on business and Carole and me were taking the next flight out the next morning. But Finn just got in his car and drove all night. By the time Carole and me got to New York, Finn was watching _Moulin Rouge_ with Kurt on the couch.

But they had to learn to be like that. It took years. They needed to, I guess, get used to the other. Just like I needed to get used to that Blaine kid being more than Kurt's friend.

You know, walking in on your boy kissing another boy is weird. Not cause it was Blaine, but cause I wasn't ready for Kurt to be kissing boys. That's a really crap ass thing to say. I know. Like they say, baby steps, you know? It's one thing to know that Kurt's going to be doing that stuff. It's another to see it. And then there it was. They were in Kurt's room, on the _bed_. I didn't know what to do.

Kurt blushed. Blaine mumbled something. I didn't really care what. Then Blaine was banned from Kurt's bedroom. We had this rule for Finn – no girls in the bedroom. And then after the Blaine incident Kurt had the same rule – no boys in the bedroom. Kurt flipped out and started yelling things about equality and stuff about being gay.

You know, I'm a patient guy. But my kid needed to stop throwing that in my face every fucking time he didn't agree with me. I never gave him a reason to think that I didn't accept that he was gay. I always told him he was my son and I loved him. But him being gay was like a defense. And I was tired of it. So, I told him we were treating him equally and he needed to start seeing that I was doing the best damn job I could. I make mistakes, but if there's one thing I know it's my kid has just as much of a right to be on this Earth as anyone else. I will fucking fight to the death for his right to love and be with whoever he chooses. But I was not going to let him do that _stuff_ in his bedroom when we didn't let Finn. That was the end of it.

Then one day when I was trying to make that soufflé thing Kurt had taught me. I wanted to impress Carole. He came into the kitchen and sat down. "You didn't whisk the eggs enough," he coughed. From there he helped me finish it, perfectly made I might add, and told me about Blaine.

"He's my boyfriend, dad."

So I had to accept that my son was dating a guy. It worried me. Kids in high school are all about sex and doing what feels good. I was one of them. Sex was just something to do. But for Kurt, I didn't want that. I didn't want him to rush into things. This Blaine kid seemed pretty freaking eager to _do_ what teenage guys do. Or that's what I thought. Blaine was probably _experienced_ in ways that Kurt just wasn't.

Yeah, my kid's a man and can handle himself. But could he really say no to Blaine when they were in the middle of _things_? I didn't want my kid to regret doing anything. And I know that Finn gave him condoms. Every night, Kurt brought Finn warm milk like his mom used to do with him. I don't know who ended up drinking the stuff. One night I walked past Finn's room and heard Finn say something about giving him protection and Blaine.

I know that I shouldn't have been like that. I mean, hell, I lost my virginity long before Kurt's age. But Kurt gets so passionate about things to a point where he's almost obsessed. I didn't want him to get fucked over by some guy – in both senses. Cause he deserved better. My kid deserved better.

There were times when Kurt would go out with Blaine that I thought he'd come back _different_. You know? I didn't know how kids liked to _do it_ in those days. But my buddies and I would pretty much go anywhere at that age and just go for it. We'd hope in the backseat of a car with a girl and do it. And Kurt deserved more than to go in some freaking backseat of a car or some half rate hotel and lose it.

I can say now that never happened. Luckily. Cause like I told Kurt, he was worth so much more than that.

But I guess it helped that he also left that expensive academy to go back to McKinley. At the time I didn't agree with it. But it was his choice. He hadn't even been at Dalton for a semester. At first I thought it was cause the McKinley glee club won that regional award and were going to New York. But he told me that needed to go back and fight. He'd never forgive himself if he didn't. And I was proud. Probably one of the most proud moments of my life. The kid was going back to that fucking place where that asshole jock threatened his life. I don't know if I could be that strong at his age. Actually, I know for damn sure I wouldn't have been.

He told me he needed to stand up for himself in this _cow-town_. That I was the one who taught him to fight. And sometimes I wish I didn't say those damn words. I wanted my kid to be at a safe place. Not going back to McKinley just cause I said a few words that he remembered.

I guess, at least back at McKinley, he actually hung out with kids other than Blaine. His friends from glee club started coming over and he had sleep-overs with Mercedes, Rachel and Tina again. Something I hadn't seen him do in a while.

People say raising teenagers is hard. They should try raising a gay boy and straight boy at the same time. Finn bitched that it wasn't fair Kurt got to have girls sleep in his room in bed and Kurt bitched that it wasn't fair that Finn's guy friends could stay overnight.

I don't know how Carole and me got through it.

But maybe that's a key to raising kids. You just keep going cause frankly you don't have a choice.

******(****)****(****)******

**Blaine -**

**Thanks for doing that Skype phone video chat site with Carole and me. I know she was relieved to see you and not just hear your voice. We've both been pretty worried about you. she's real anxious to get out to see you in person. **

**You keep taking that medicine the doctors gave you, okay? I know it's a pain in the ass. But you keep taking it. And don't overwork yourself. Kurt told me that you stay at the office til 2AM sometimes. You need to take care of yourself and rest. Kurt loves you kid. He needs you around. And we do too.**

**Thanks.**

**Burt **

_Hi Burt,_

_Trust me. I'm taking care of myself. I'm eating better. Kurt hasn't allowed me to eat Mexican since._

_It was nice to see you and Carole too. Tell her that Kurt's almost ready for you guys to come out here and see what he's been working on. It should be soon._

_I read what you sent me and I remember that day. I bet it was probably weird to see Kurt and I in that position._

_I swear, I never knew about the condoms though! I'll have to ask Kurt about that sometime!_

_Take care,_  
_Blaine _

* * *

_A/N: Sorry for the delay AGAIN. FF updating really caused a hiccup in updating. Anyways, thanks for being patient :D _

_IMAGE: anisalee(.)livejournal(.)com(/)18104(.)html  
_

_As always comments/recs/links/reviews/alerts/etc. are always appreciated! You guys blow me away. THANK YOU!  
_


	14. Chapter 13

I went to visit Kurt's mom the other day. Brought her some pictures of Kurt and Blaine. I know that she would've loved Blaine. I try to see her once a month. I don't want to forget her, you know? I used to bring Kurt with me when he was a kid. He stopped going when he got into high school. I guess it was just too hard for the kid to go. We used to get these phone calls from those telemarketers and they'd think Kurt was her. I know it shook him up every damn time. After a while it let up, but still he just stopped wanting to visit her. I think that's when he stopped believing in God. Maybe it was just too hard for him to accept his mom died when he was 8. Maybe he just decided that there wasn't a God. Sometimes, I felt that way too, you know? How could a God take away a little boy's mom? It didn't make sense. It took me a long time to just accept that bad shit just happened for no reason sometimes.

After she died, the cops and DA's wanted me to testify at that fucking kid's sentencing. Someone even told me to bring Kurt. You know, parade the kid around with the grieving husband. So, I went. Left Kurt was his mom's mom. He didn't see his grandma again til he was 18. She freaking missed almost 9 years of his life. Both her and his mom's dad. Pissed me off that they wouldn't be in his life just cause his mom was dead. But I guess I'm getting a head of myself.

The point is that Kurt just shut down when it came to his mom. That hurt, you know. She loved him so much. She used to call him her _baby Kurtie_. Only person he's allowed to call him Kurtie. Now if you call him that, the kid may just give you a look that turns you to freaking stone.

I heard that Blaine call him that once. A big mistake. I think that name is probably the one thing Kurt holds to be sacred to his mom. But other than that, they seemed to get along pretty good. I never knew how a relationship between two dudes would be. And I still didn't like Blaine all that much, but they seemed okay. I mean, not much different than two guys just hanging out. After the incident in Kurt's bedroom, they didn't kiss much where I could see. Which was okay with me. I know that I needed more time to get used to it. To this situation. I kind of thought that when Kurt got a boyfriend, it'd be some dude who was like Finn. I knew about that crush he had and my kid isn't a girl but he is pretty effeminate. And I thought he'd go for some dude who was opposite of him. This Blaine wasn't really. The kid was even a bit shorter than my kid.

And just when I thought I was starting to have a handle on all this. You know, Blaine the boyfriend and Kurt actually having a relationship with a guy. They threw the Prom at me. Kurt told me he asked Blaine to McKinley's Prom – I gotta admit I was kind of surprised. My boy who liked tiara's, tea parties, and princess movies when he was a kid manned up and asked a boy to Prom. I was proud. My kid wasn't afraid to go to that Prom and bring whoever the hell he wanted. But that Principal Figgins and the damn school board wasn't going to let my kid bring the person he wanted. I may not have liked that Blaine at the time, but my kid had a fucking right to go that Prom with his date.

You know what their excuse was? They didn't want to upset the other parents. They had to respect everyone going. Respect? My kid was a part of that school. He deserved respect. After the shit they put me through with that Karofsky asshole. And I went down to that school and told them they couldn't do that to my kid. My kid was going to go to that damn Prom and if he wanted to wear a fucking pink tutu and tiara while doing it, they were just going to have to fucking suck it up. You know? I'm a tax paying guy. My money goes into their damn pockets every payday. So who the hell were they to tell me it wasn't okay for my kid to go to their dance.

It was times like that I got how different my kid was treated. Equal protection under the law my ass. So I went to that stupid school board meeting. Told them who I was. Now I'm not much of a public speaker. But I told them that my kid had a right to bring his boyfriend to that Prom. And yeah maybe it might piss off some people. But what the hell were two 17 year old boys going to a school dance hurting? Why the heck did they care that two dudes were going to spend 3 hours in McKinley's gym together?

And I guess something I said worked cause they were _allowed_ to go. Like they needed freaking permission. I'll always remember that a couple days before the dance, that Blaine came to the tire shop again. And he talked, I listened. He told me about the bullying shit he went through. How his life wasn't perfect or anything. The kid was bold. He straight out told me he had money and that's how he grew up. But he liked Kurt. He respected Kurt. He accepted Kurt. And you know, I admit the kid had balls. He came to me as a man. I guess that's when I started to see him as more than a dollar sign with legs.

So they went to that Prom. Kurt spent days getting ready for something that was only a few hours. But that's my kid. And I got to admit that when that Blaine showed up, they did look good together. I never thought I'd say that. But there's a first for everything, right? I did the obligatory parent thing with Carole and took pictures of Finn and his date, Quinn and Kurt and Blaine. But I knew what kids did on Prom night. And I was nervous. I fought for my kid to go to that dance. But it was the after stuff I was worried about. I didn't go to my Prom, but I did the after parties and got hammered with my buddies. I didn't sleep with any girl that night, but a lot of my buddies did. And some with the same girl.

But Kurt was 17 and I needed to accept that sex was just part of growing up. And if he and that Blaine _did it_ then hopefully those damn pamphlets would come to help the process. Carole didn't have to worry about that stuff. Finn had already lost his virginity. She didn't have to worry that Finn would regret doing it for the first time. Not like Kurt.

God-damn Prom caused too much of a headache for me. I hoped it would be worth it for the kid. And that Blaine really meant what he said to me. That he respected Kurt enough to be able to stop if Kurt said no. I think Prom is the one thing that parents probably dread cause it's all about partying, sex and booze.

That's why it shocked the hell out of me when Kurt snuck into the house at 2AM. Me and Carole heard the door. Kurt smiled at me in the hall and told me he had a great time with Blaine. The kid told me he had half a drink and Blaine a sip of whatever Kurt was drinking. And then they decided to call it a night.

I was impressed. Blaine might not be my favorite person at the time. But the kid had done good that night. They both had done good that night. Finn on the other hand came home hung-over and still half drunk. Carole made him get up and help me in the tire shop instead of sleeping it off. She plays dirty like that. I love her for it.

******(****)****(****)******

From: Kurt Hummel-Anderson  
Subject: Invites  
To: Dad  
CC: Blaine , Carole , Finn , Mercedes , Rachel , Tina-Mike Chang …more

Hey everyone,

Your invites went out in the mail today! Hopefully you all can make it. I've been working hard and can't wait for everyone to see what I've been doing.

Also, if anyone needs a place to stay, Blaine and I can host a couple of people. Let us know.

Hope to see you!

Kurt

******(****)****(****)******

From: Blaine Anderson  
Subject: Re: Invites  
To: Kurt Hummel-Anderson

I don't get a mailed invitation? :( I'm hurt!

******(****)****(****)******

From: Kurt Hummel-Anderson  
Subject: Re: Invites  
To: Blaine

Big baby! Fine, I'll mail one to you tomorrow to OUR apartment if it'll make you happy

******(****)****(****)******

From: Blaine Anderson  
Subject: Re: Invites  
To: Kurt Hummel-Anderson

:)

******(****)****(****)******

From: Burt Hummel  
Subject: Next One  
To: Blaine Anderson  
Attachment: ()

Blaine –

I hope that everything is going good. We got Kurt's invitation the other day and Carole is real excited. She's starting to pick out what she's going to wear.

Here's the next part.

Burt

******(****)****(****)******

From: Blaine Anderson  
Subject: Re: Next One  
To: Burt Hummel

Hi Burt,

I'm glad you two got the invitation. Kurt's really excited too. He's been waiting for this day for what seems like forever. Let me or Kurt know if you and Carole need our guest room.

I want you to know that Prom night was never going to be for "that." Kurt and I talked about it and I knew he wasn't ready. Honestly, I wasn't ready either. We were only together for a few months and I know that neither of us was ready for anything more. I know we respected each other enough to know that we needed to wait.

Also, I always appreciated what you did for Kurt (and me in relation) in fighting for our right to go the prom. It was one of my favorite memories of Kurt and my relationship. We got to dance with each other and be ourselves. It meant a lot to me.

Take care,  
Blaine

******(****)****(****)******

From: Burt Hummel  
Subject: Re: Invites  
To: Kurt Hummel-Anderson

Kurt –

Got your invitation in the mail today. I'm proud of you. And I'm blown away and honored. You're really something special kid.

Do you need me and Carole to bring anything? Carole and me are going to stay at a hotel a few blocks from you guys' apartment.

Love you kid.

Dad

******(****)****(****)******

From: Kurt Hummel-Anderson  
Subject: Re: Invites  
To: Dad

Hey dad,

Just bring yourselves. If you change your mind, Blaine and I are happy to have you guys. Finn and his wife are staying at a hotel too. I think Mercedes might be staying with us, but the guest bedroom is yours if you want it.

Love you,

Kurt

******(****)****(****)******

Invitation:

The Brummel House

You are cordially invited to attend The Brummel House open house and benefit gala.

Join us for a night of performance, music and art!

About the Brummel House

The Brummel House is located in the heart of New York City. It will offer children and teens with a safe haven to be themselves and offer classes and workshops in drama, music and art. The Brummel House will provide these services to all children and teens of any race and sexuality free of charge. The Brummel House will also work with the local schools to implement anti-bullying programs, including counseling services to students who have been victims of bullying and services to help those who bully understand why they take part in this behavior.

One of the first tasks that The Brummel House will take part in is passing a bill that would give the New York school district additional funding to bring art programs and anti-bullying programs into the schools that the Brummel House cannot service.

This project is a creative endeavor of up-and-coming fashion designer, Kurt Hummel and is named after his father, Burt Hummel. Mr. Hummel is an openly gay man and was, himself, a victim of bullying when he was a teenager.

* * *

_**A/N: Thank you guys so much for all the feedback and reviews! I'm blown away by how this story is being received. I'm just shocked that I even got over 100 reviews on it! You all are amazing! :D**_

_**Images: anisalee(.)livejournal(.)com(/)18387(.)html**_

_**As always reviews/links/recs/alerts/etc are always appreciated!**_

_**Also I received some comments (PM's and such) asking if I worked in PR because the Brummel House sounded very professional and if I was a professional PR person. The answer is yes, I've worked in PR and done press releases and media alerts for various clients (some higher profile). I'm not a "professional" in the sense that it's my career. Just something I worked in while going to university. So that may be why it reads that way. I modeled it after a client I had for a non-profit organization. :) Thanks for asking and complimenting!**_

**_Second, I realize that sometimes Burt's wording is not grammatically correct. It's done purposefully. :)  
_**


	15. Chapter 14

I remember the first time I took Kurt to New York. It was at the end of his junior year. He wanted to go see that Parson's Fashion School. I always thought my boy would go to a school in Ohio. Somewhere close to me. So when he came to me with info on that fashion school, I was surprised. I knew the kid liked New York. Heck, they had that glee club competition there and he came back so excited. Even though his team lost. But Kurt didn't care. He told me about all the buildings and the musicals he saw. That Blaine was there too. Kid didn't go to McKinley, but went there for Kurt. I was worried. Kurt and that Blaine in a city together with a hotel. But Finn told me that Blaine came with a few dudes from Dalton and stayed with one of their aunts or something.

So, Kurt dragged me all around that place. He took me to this rock musical and I thought it was pretty cool. I know my kid likes them musicals like the one he wanted to sing that song from. The one that Schuester wasn't going to let him try out for. But this rock one wasn't bad.

And we met with the people from Parson's. They told Kurt a bunch of stuff he needed to do to get in. Then they took us around that place and let him and me sit in on a class. I didn't understand what they were talking about. Something having to do with patterns and weaving and fabrics. I didn't get it. But I could tell my kid loved it. Afterwards, he couldn't stop talking about that place. I didn't like the idea of Kurt going to this place where I couldn't keep an eye on him.

But when I got home, I started to set some more money aside to send him there. I didn't need to wait for Kurt to apply. That school would be stupid not to take my kid. If you just look at him you can see that he likes fashion. I don't get what he wears sometimes. But the way he talks about his clothes I knew it was important to him.

My kid had a future. He was going to have a life outside of Lima. And I was scared. I didn't want that shit that happened with that Karofsky to happen where I couldn't see. Like I said, Kurt is good at hiding things. If something happened in New York, he wouldn't tell me. The one thing Kurt got from me was being stubborn. My kid wanted to take care of things on his own. He didn't know when to ask for help. Or at least from me. I guess he was just like me in that way. I don't want people to think they need to help me. I can take care of myself. Kurt's just like that.

That whole summer Kurt got his application together. I wanted the kid to have as many opportunities as he could. And if Lima couldn't do it for him, then I knew he needed to go to a place that could. But damn-it I was still scared. My kid looked like he was freaking 10. You know of those sick ass child molesters out there? I was afraid they'd look at Kurt and want to do _stuff_ to him. You know?

But I wanted the best for him. And Lima wasn't the best. I had buddies and a few guys at the tire shop ask if Kurt was going to take over the shop for me. If there's one thing I knew, it was that I didn't want my boy to be stuck at that tire store. It was good for me. I'm an average dude and there was nothing wrong with being a mechanic. I worked hard every day of my life to put food on the table and provide for my family. But Kurt was different. Kurt had talent that I never did. Kurt wasn't average, you know? I know it should be every dad's dream for their son to follow in their footsteps. Kurt was better than that. He was better than me.

I just remember thinking that my kid was really grown up. He was really a man now. He and that Blaine kid were still together. I kind of thought it wouldn't last. I mean what high school relationship lasts? I had my share of girls in high school, but none that I can even remember their names. That's probably a mean thing to say. But it's true. Plus, my kid was with another dude and high school guys get bored easy. Or at least me and my buddies did.

But I guess they seemed different. I don't know, Kurt and Blaine seemed to have something. It reminded me of me and Kurt's mom. I saw a look on Kurt's face when Blaine and him were together. And I could tell that Kurt loved this boy. It took Kurt a lot to love someone. I knew that. Sure, the kid had crushes and called it _love _before. I heard him talk to his friends and there was stuff that Finn told me. But I knew my kid. I'm his dad. And like I said my kid liked to hid things. He also liked to close himself off. And I hated that. Before his mom died, he wasn't like that. But I knew that this thing with Blaine was real love. Blaine was my sons' first love. This guy did something right with my kid.

You know, I was torn. I knew my kid was lonely. It didn't take much to know that. So, I was glad he'd found someone. But with first love you get first heart break. And I didn't want to see my kid get hurt. High school relationships don't last, you know. High school's a time to experiment. God knows I did my share of that at McKinley. So, I guess I figured it was only a matter of time before Kurt and Blaine broke up.

But it was part of life and growing up. As a parent, I knew that you couldn't protect your kids forever. They needed to fall on their ass sometimes.

******(****)****(****)******

TEXT MESSAGES:

**From Burt Hummel: **

**We just got to JFK. Heading to the hotel and then to your place. Didn't want to bug Kurt. I know he's busy getting ready for tomorrow.**

_From: Blaine Anderson_

_Sounds good. Just call/txt when you get here. We gave the front desk your names so everything should be okay. I must warn you - things are absolute chaos here._

**From: Burt Hummel**

**Carole and me will help with whatever. Finn just called and he's on his way over to. He's dropping his family off at the hotel first.**

_From: Blaine Anderson_

_Good. You all can help me get Kurt out of the apartment and get some food into him. He's stressing out b/c Mercedes flight was delayed._

**From: Burt Hummel**

**About to get into the elevator. Finn's with us. See you in a minute. **

**********(****)****(****)******

******Blaine -**

******We had a great time. Here's the next chapter.**

******Burt**

******************(****)****(****)******

From: Blaine Anderson  
Subject: Hey  
To: Burt Hummel

Hey Burt,

It was so great to see you guys! I'm so glad that the benefit and the open house went good. Kurt was able to relax properly for the first time yesterday. Now that The Brummel House is officially open, Kurt's trying to get me to do a music workshop for the kids. I forgot how much I missed singing after singing with Kurt.

I'm pretty sure we're going to be going up to the Hamptons for a long weekend. Kurt really wants to see where I spent some of my summers growing up. So, I think we're going to rent house for a couple days and just spend some time together.

Also, thanks for leaving your chapter with the door man. Kurt's anxious to get his hands on these. I read through it and for a time I did think you were right about high school love; especially with all the stuff that happened in our first two years in college.

I agree with you. Kurt is so talented and deserves everything. I'm constantly amazed that he's still with me after all these years.

Anyways, I've attached a scan of the New York Times article about The Brummel House.

Take Care,  
Blaine**  
**

**************(****)****(****)******

**Opening The Door On Anti-Bullying**  
_New York Times, Arts_

Last Friday, local fashion designer Kurt Hummel, held an exclusive benefit gala for The Brummel House. Tickets for the event ranged from $500 - $5,000.

This organization is set up to help the New York public school systems combat bullying in the classrooms. It will provide youth with counseling services for both those who bully and are victims of bullying. Additionally, The Brummel House will offer free classes in music, drama, and art to local teens.

Kurt Hummel, an openly gay man who married his partner (Manhattan attorney Blaine Anderson) in 2018, was a victim of bullying himself.

"I went through Hell in high school. If it wasn't for my family and Blaine, I don't know if I would have made it," said Hummel.

The benefit showcased talents of several teens in the area that ranged from music to drama. Anderson joined his husband on stage for a duet.

After Anderson's performance, he told NYT, "I'm so proud of Kurt. This has been something he's been working on for a long time. I'm glad to see it finally in fruition."

Rising Broadway star, Rachel Berry, was also in attendance.

"I've known Kurt for a long time and I couldn't be prouder of him," Berry said.

Also in attendance was Mercedes, who sang her debut single "Hell to the No," from the upcoming album Mercedes, and celebrity choreographer, Mike Chang.

Following the festivities, Hummel was joined on stage by his father, Burt Hummel, in which the organization was named after.

Saturday morning, Hummel held an open house for the public. On auction were Rachel Berry autographed playbills, a private dance session with Mike Chang, and a personal make-over by Hummel. A VIP, all inclusive trip with backstage passes to see Mercedes in concert was the highest bid item.

The Brummel House raised over $100,000.

For more information, please visit BrummelHouse(.)org or e-mail info(A)brummelhouse(.)org

* * *

A/N: This is VERY IMAGE HEAVY. To see the images please go to: anisalee(.)livejournal(.)com(/)18527(.)html

Thank you guys for all the lovely PM's and reviews. People have asked, and yes I do have a background/experience in PR and journalism. :D lol. I hope you guys enjoy this. :D Thanks for reading!

As always reviews/recs/links/alerts/etc. always appreciated!


	16. Chapter 15

Carole and me went to Breadstix the other night. She called it a "date night." I don't really get why people like this place. The breadsticks taste like cardboard and the spaghetti doesn't have enough meat in it. But it does good. They're even building a new one a few stores down from my tire shop.

Anyways, we're sitting there and they seat these two dudes at the table next to us. Carole and me knew that these guys were _together_. Years of watching Kurt and Blaine, I picked up on a few things. And then I looked at the guy and it was David Karofsky. I'll remember that name for the rest of my life. The punk that made my kid's life hell for God knows how long before Kurt told me the truth.

And yeah, it was weird. This guy bullied the shit out of my kid cause he was gay when he was gay himself. Kurt told me it was cause he was scared. I got that. But that's not an excuse to do what he did to my kid. I even found out that the guy kissed Kurt. It was Blaine who told me about it. He didn't mean to tell me I guess. But it came out and when I asked Kurt about it, he told me it was no big deal. He hides shit all the time, like I said. Makes me wonder what other stuff he hid from me or even Blaine. You know?

That's why Karofsky threatened my kid. He fucking kissed Kurt and then threatened to kill him. And Kurt protected him. All because this guy was freaking scared of a kid half his weight. I mean, what the hell could Kurt do to that guy? Not a whole damn lot. I know my kid. He's got morals. Would never use someone's sexuality as a way to get back at them. But this jackass decided that Kurt was a threat. As if a flipping 130 lb dude soaking wet was a threat to him.

My kid had been freaking sexually assaulted and no one thought that I might want to know this. The only person who knew was Blaine and he sure as hell didn't say a word to me. He came to me asking to for me to give Kurt the talk and fed me lines about respecting Kurt. Told me what I wanted to hear. But the guy never once mentioned that Kurt had been sexually assaulted. And when I did find out, it was in passing. Like they were talking about a movie or whatever. This damn kid thought it was important for Kurt to know about sex. But not that some asshole jock had attacked him. That part was just left out. I'm the kid's dad. I'm supposed to know about that stuff.

You know, I wanted to march down to that school board and make them expel that Karofsky permanently before the school year started. But Kurt begged me not to. He sat me down and told me that Karofsky deserved the right to come out when he was ready. My kid. This was my kid. He was protecting this guy who bullied him day after day and forced him to leave McKinley. It's frustrating, you know? I was so proud of my kid for giving respect to another person. But this punk didn't deserve that from Kurt. He deserved to be called out for his bullshit. I wanted to get that Karofsky kicked out. But cause of Kurt, I didn't say a damn word to anyone. I would've been a jackass for outing some 17 year old kid, even if that kid was a bigger jackass.

Kurt and me had a long talk that summer. And I told him that he needed to stop hiding stuff from me. That's when I found out he did it cause he was afraid for my heart. I guess I never realized how much my heart attack fucked up his life. After I got out of the hospital, things happened so fast. The next thing I knew I was asking Carole to marry me. But I guess I should've stopped and checked to see how my kid was doing. I was the reason why he didn't tell me stuff. And if my damn heart hadn't screwed up, maybe my kid could've stayed at McKinley. You know?

I told him I wasn't going nowhere for a long time. I was there to stay. I was Hummel made. But I knew he didn't believe me. Why would he? The kid lost his mom when he was 8. I don't think he ever got over it. He didn't even really get to say goodbye to her. She was gone before either of us could. I was a grown man and didn't know how to deal with it. How could a kid?

I thought I was doing the right thing not pushing him and all. That might've been the problem. I didn't grow up talking about my feelings or what my day was like. Yeah, Andy and I talked, but not like that. I know that's not an excuse. Maybe Kurt just didn't want to come to me. I mean I don't have the best track record. I flipped out over a box of tiaras under my kid's bed, you know. Maybe he just didn't want to talk to _me_. Or maybe if I would've just asked Kurt what was going on, he would've told me.

My heart. My god-damn heart was the cause of all this. Finn told me about Kurt singing that Beatles song in that glee club to me. And how he found my boy crying in the school's library. You know how I said I only cried three times in my adult life? Well, this was the third time. I found Kurt and pulled him to me and held my kid. My little boy. My son. And I promised that I wasn't going anywhere. I was there to stay. And I was going to do every fucking thing in my power to live up to that promise. He was going to outlive me. Kids should outlive their parents. Plain and simple. And I apologized to Kurt that some drunk driver asshole killed his mom. I hoped it was enough.

Anyways, back to my story. So, Carole and me saw that Karofsky guy. He didn't say anything to me. But I watched him. He seemed happy. Was even holding that other guys' hand. And I thought that here's a dude who was so fucking afraid to be gay in high school. Here he was out and open with another dude. When the waiter brought our bill, he handed me an envelope. Inside was a check from that Karofsky made out to The Brummel House. So, maybe that guy was a jackass and I still can't get over what he did to _my_ kid. But maybe it's a start, you know.

Maybe everyone deserved a second chance. Maybe some people really do change, even that Karofsky punk.

****(****)****(****)****

From: Burt Hummel  
Subject: Here you go  
To: Blaine Anderson  
Attachment: (Part15)

Blaine –

We just put Kurt on a plane back to you. Carole and me were hoping you could come for the weekend with him. But he told us you had plans to meet up with some of your law school buddies.

I meant to thank you for the New York Times article you sent me a while back. Kurt brought me and Carole a bunch of newspaper articles about The Brummel House.

You take care of yourself kid.

Burt

******(****)****(****)******

From: Blaine Anderson  
Subject: Re: Here you go  
To: Burt Hummel

Hi Burt,

I wish I could have gone with Kurt for the weekend too, but my law school friends and I had planned this for months. We went camping in the Adirondacks in upstate New York. It was kind of nice to just be away from it all without technology. It was also nice to just hang out with friends. I've always wanted to take Kurt camping, but you know him. He's a city boy, and the idea of going a few days without running water or bathrooms might just give him a nervous breakdown!

Speaking of which, I know I should have told you about David Karofsky's kiss. However, I was young and Kurt didn't want anyone to know. I know it's not an excuse, but I wanted to be loyal to Kurt.

I don't know if anyone ever told you, but David and I got into a bit of a fight before junior Prom. I think that's the only time I've ever started a fight with anyone in my life. All I remember is he kept taunting Kurt and I couldn't take it anymore, so I shoved him. Kurt was the one who broke it up. He told me, and this is something that's stuck with me, that by getting into a shoving match with Karofsky, it didn't change anything – it just made me as much of a bully as him. He was right, violence doesn't change anything.

Anyways, we'll be back in Lima for Thanksgiving, if not sooner.

Take Care,  
Blaine

* * *

_A/N: I seriously am on a role! I can't believe I just got another chapter out! I hope it's good what I'm producing LOL. Very talkative Burt! I can't get him to shut up! hehe :D Thanks so much guys!_

_As always, **reviews/links/recs/alerts/etc. are always appreciated!** And I do read every single review I get! You guys are just so amazing! I appreciate every comment I get! It truly means a lot :D_


	17. Chapter 16

When Kurt was a baby, I was scared to hold him. He was so small. I didn't think that something could be that small. I was afraid I'd break him or something. I mean, here was this little baby who I helped make. I looked at him and I didn't know I could love something so much. He was my boy.

You know, when me and Kurt's mom took him home, I just wanted to look at him. I was a freaking dad. I was responsible for another life. I just didn't want to fuck it up. And I remember Kurt's mom put him in my arms and he grabbed my finger and squeezed. My kid was strong. He was something special.

And I would just watch Kurt and his mom and think that I was a lucky guy. I was just some dude who didn't have a lot going on for him. But she looked at me and she loved me. And then we had this family. I had a kid. And God-damn if that wasn't terrifying. He was this helpless baby and I was supposed to raise him. All I knew about kids is I had been one. I didn't know what the hell I was doing. But Kurt's mom held my hand. You know. She got me through it.

There was stuff I needed to learn how to do with Kurt. Like diapers. Those damn things should've been labeled front and back. And when I asked Kurt's mom about it, she just told me to look at it and I'd know. When I thought I got it on him, I picked him up and the whole thing fell off. Kurt's mom laughed at me, kissed my cheek and showed me. You know how they say babies bring couples together? That's what happened with us. It stopped being just me and her. We became me, her and a baby.

Kurt became our priority. And I started thinking about stuff I hadn't before. Like about taking him to ball games and teaching him about cars. Taking him out for hoagies and stuffing our faces watching a Reds game.

Me and his mom took him to his first game when he was four. Put him in a Buckeyes t-shirt and baseball cap and took him to Ohio Stadium to see the game. I thought the kid would love it. I mean big crowd, food, football. But he fell asleep ten minutes into the game on his mom's lap.

On the way home, his mom asked if he liked the game and he said he liked the _costumes_ the girls wore and their shiny pom-poms. I took my kid to a football game and the only thing he liked were the freaking cheerleaders uniforms. I guess we didn't think that much of it. I mean I just figured my kid liked the dance moves and jumps. And hey, I thought it was kind of cool my kid was looking at cheerleaders at 4, you know.

That same year, Kurt started kindergarten. And it was hard to see him go. Yeah, I worked all day. But he was growing up, you know. I took the morning off at the tire shop and me and his mom took him to school. The kid was small, but he looked tiny carrying his backpack and lunch box. He made us buy him a lunch box with lots of colors and glitter on it. He even wanted to wear a bow tie. I don't know where my kid got this obsession with bow ties. It for sure wasn't from me. And I just remember thinking my kid was too little to start school. We walked him to the classroom and he waved to us and that was it.

His mom cried the whole way home. He was her baby. Me and her had talked about having more kids, but that didn't happen. Being pregnant with Kurt had been a lot on her. And Kurt had been born a few weeks early. His mom always told me that Kurt was just impatient to see the world. I'm not that much of a sentimental dude, but I thought it was cause he wanted to see his mom. I mean, who wouldn't want to know her. She was amazing. She wasn't perfect. But she was his mom.

I loved her. I still do and I know I always will love her. As much as I love Carole, Kurt's mom is my first love, you know. And I know that I'll never replace Finn's dad for Carole. I guess that's probably why we work together.

I remember when I told Carole that my kid was gay. She laughed and said that it wasn't a big secret. You know, I saw the way some people looked at my kid. After my heart attack, he took me to the damn doctors check up months later in a black kilt. No one said anything. But I saw the way the people looked at him. And I hated it. I knew they were judging my kid. Kurt noticed too. When we got back to the car, I told him that if he wanted to wear a skirt thing, that was cool. He gave me this look and I thought hell, my kid was going to cry or something. But instead he told me that it was a kilt and he didn't care what people in this _cow-town _thought. When we got back Carole told him she loved the kilt look.

Carole treated Kurt just like he was her own kid. She just loved him. And that's what I wanted for our family. I wanted Kurt to be loved for just being himself, you know. I guess that's the thing that's real important. That my boy could be himself. And that no one, not even me, could change him. And I didn't want him to change, you know. If there's one thing I've learned about being a dad, it's that kids should be free to be who they are.

****(****)****(****)****

From: Burt Hummel  
Subject: Here you go  
To: Blaine Anderson  
Attachment: (Chapter16)

Blaine –

Kurt called me and told us that you guys ended up going to the Hamptons last month. I hope you guys had a good time. Both of you needed a break. Hopefully you got to relax for a while.

Anyways, here's the next part. Take your time, kid.

Burt

****(****)****(****)****

From: Blaine Anderson  
Subject: Re: Kurt  
To: Burt Hummel

Hey Burt,

The Hamptons was a great trip. I took Kurt to the beach I spent my summers at and showed him the country club I practically lived at when I was there. The manager even remembered me and Kurt got her to tell him some stories when I was a kid.

I can imagine Kurt falling asleep at a Buckeyes game! Whenever he tries to appease me and watch football with me, he always ends up falling asleep. I don't know how he stayed awake during the game he actually played in at McKinley.

I can just picture Kurt heading off to kindergarten. Tell me you have photos you can send me!

Take Care,  
Blaine

****(****)****(****)****

**A/N: This will probably be the last update until next week. I cannot believe I updated every single day this week! :D**

**As always reviews/links/recs/alerts/etc are always appreciated! You guys continue to amaze me with your wonderful support!**


	18. Chapter 17

There were times I'd look at Kurt and wonder where the heck my little boy went. It was like one day he was a kid and then he was this 18 year old guy. He was becoming a man. Heck, he was a man. I'm ashamed to admit, but my kid had been taking care of the house stuff for years. He had been a man for years.

He learned to cook when he was 12. I tried to learn to, but it hard. I'd never had to do that stuff before. When my parents didn't leave me and Andy dinner, we'd just go get something from the gas station or a TV dinner or something. We didn't cook. When Kurt's mom died, I tried to keep things normal for him. Kids needed stability, right? So, I got one of the recipes his mom had – some chicken and rice thing – and tried to do it. Damn thing was raw and still half frozen on the inside. I remember Kurt trying to hide his laugh and I just laughed right along with him. And then he stopped and I looked at him. Kid was about to cry. And I kept thinking it was too soon, you know. Too soon to laugh. His mom had been dead for less than a week. So I pulled my boy into my arms. It was all I could do. I was barely getting through. I wasn't good with that _kind_ of stuff. His mom always did that.

So we got through, you know. And then Kurt found that Blaine guy. The dude who acted polite enough and reeked of money. But he was alright, I guess. I mean he made my kid happy. So that was okay. And Carole and Finn liked him enough. Finn even took Blaine with him and some of those dudes from McKinley to games and stuff. And Carole used to tell me how great she thought he was. But as much as she loved Kurt, she wasn't his parent. I was. And I still wasn't sure about this guy. I mean, no kid his age was like that. Who would go to their boyfriend's dad and tell him their kid needed a sex talk? But cause of Kurt, I tried.

And then Kurt told me that Blaine was going to McKinley. He was leaving that fancy Dalton place. Apparently the kid wanted to stand up for himself or something. Now, I'm all for kids like him and Kurt standing up for their right to love whoever the hell they want. But this didn't sit right with me. Why would a kid like this Blaine give up a fancy school like Dalton? I wasn't too happy that this Blaine would be spending even more time with Kurt. When my boy was at Dalton, it was always him and that Blaine. I didn't want my kid to just spend all his time with just one person, you know. When Kurt went to McKinley he stated hanging out with those glee club kids and that was good.

The next time Blaine was over waiting for Kurt, I asked him about it. I don't care if it was rude or if I was overstepping. But I asked the kid flat out why he was transferring to McKinley. I thought he was going to give me some bullshit lines, but he seemed pretty damn sincere. Told me about the shit he went through before he went to Dalton. Admitted that it wasn't nearly what my boy had gone through, but he was bullied. Damn punk asshole bullies exist everywhere. A kid like this had been bullied? This rich, straight looking dude. I told him I hoped McKinley would be better for him. There really wasn't anything for me to say, you know. Kids can be real assholes.

So, things started to change for my boy. He'd always been independent. Thought he had to take care of me. Which sucked, you know. I'm the parent, not him. But like I said before, kid had to grow up fast. I can't imagine how hard it was for him. One morning his mom's there and a couple hours later, she's dead. And to have to understand that this woman he loved and took care of him just wasn't going to be there anymore. I tried to do all the stuff she used to do for him. I packed his lunch and got him to school. She used to put him to bed with a warm glass of milk every night. I tried to keep that up. But the milk was always cold or too hot for him. He just told me he didn't want it any more. Later, when he started bringing Finn a glass, I knew it wasn't the truth. My kid just didn't want me making his milk for him cause I wasn't his mom.

Anyways, watching my kid turn 18 was hard. It was like that first day of kindergarten all over again, you know. He was this man now. His mom had been dead for more than half his life. And I'm telling you, me and Kurt got by before Carole and Finn. We worked hard and fucking got through it. But it wasn't til I saw Kurt with Carole that I knew he had been missing something. And it was my damn fault. I guess I thought I'd been enough for my kid. But I was wrong. He needed a mom, you know? And I didn't give him that. I tried to give him every damn thing he wanted. But I waited til he was almost a man to give him that one thing. Carole did things with him that I didn't get. She took him shopping and to plays or whatever they did. They would cook in the kitchen together. And you know, I guess it just all felt right.

Kurt was this kid who always tried to make things good for us. But my kid was a _kid_. And he freaking needed to be able to act like one. I mean, he just needed to go and hang out with his friends from that glee club. I wished he could have had a better childhood, you know. He was screwed out of that. The world sucked sometimes.

But hey, I guess for all the shit he had to go through, there was that Blaine kid. My kid deserved a first love like that. Some dude who seemed to really respect him. And my kid had something like every other freaking teenager out there. Is normal the right word? I guess he was just like all the other normal kids out there. He had friends and he was dating. And yeah I thought that Kurt was just going for the first gay dude he saw. But he was happy. He even started bringing me Slim Jims and Coke to the shop a couple mornings a month. And he seemed relaxed. It was really opposite from the last year and the shit he went through. He was smiling a lot more and it was nice to see.

Then I found out he had lost his virginity to that Blaine. Not that he came out and told me. I heard him on the phone with Mercedes. Not that I was trying to listen to what he was saying. I respect my kid's privacy. It was just hard to miss him saying the words _Blaine and I made love._ I stood outside his bedroom door for a good five minutes before I could actually move. Something a dad doesn't need to hear. And of course my kid would call sex _making love_. He was romantic like his mom. But it was the one thing I didn't need to know.

And I sucked it up and asked him about it when it was just him and me in the house. Asked him if he and Blaine had been _together_ and did _it_. Kurt turned red. Redder then I had seen and nodded his head. I asked him if he had been ready. I meant what I said to him about him being worth it. I didn't want my son just throwing himself at Blaine cause he felt he had to. Kurt said yeah and told me he was in love with Blaine. I think it's the most we'd talked about his life in a while. Not that we didn't talk or anything. But this was different. Looking at him, I hoped that it had been worth it, you know. That he wouldn't live to regret it. I know I always wished my first time had been different. Not something I did just to do it. But something that meant something.

I told Carole about it. After years of doing this on my own, I guess I never knew how much I missed having someone else there. I was worried about Kurt. I remembered reading those pamphlets on gay sex and I was worried about, you know, the physical stuff. Caroled told me it was natural. And that Kurt and Blaine were fine. She actually laughed and said she'd be more worried about Finn and some girl. I hoped she was right.

Before, when I gave Kurt _the talk_, I told him that sex was a great 30th birthday present for himself. I was joking, but I kind of meant it too. But at least my kid had waited until he was ready. I guess that's all part of it. You know, knowing that your kid is going to grow up and becoming an adult.

****(****)****(****)****

**Blaine -**

**Here's the next part. No hurry kid.**

**Anyways, I was cleaning out some stuff at the shop and found this picture. The lady who used to live next door took it and gave it to me. Carole said to call her about Thanksgiving plans. **

**Burt**

From: Blaine Anderson  
Subject: Thanks  
To: Burt Hummel

Hi Burt,

Thank you so much for the photo of Kurt and you. I love it.

I'm going to definitely give Carole a call about Thanksgiving. I don't think we're going to be coming in until late the night before, but I'll let you know.

I figured eventually you'd mention when you found out that Kurt and I were intimate. We talked about it a lot, just so you know. It wasn't like we just jumped into bed. I wouldn't do anything to hurt Kurt. Also, I really did transfer to McKinley to prove a point. I don't know if it was to me or to the guys who taunted me, but I never regretted that decision. It taught me to stand up for myself.

Take Care,  
Blaine

* * *

IMAGES - There is one I couldn't even describe, so if you want to see it, go here: anisalee(.)livejournal(.)com(/)19561(.)html

THANK YOU SO MUCH FOR YOUR SUPPORT!

As always recs/links/alerts/reviews/etc are always apprecicated! :)


	19. Chapter 18

I spent a lot of my time resenting Kurt's mom's family. After she died, they just stopped coming by to see him. That was shit of them. Kurt lost his mom and then his grandma stopped seeing him. Yeah, she told me it was cause it was too hard to look at Kurt. Like my kid was fucking diseased. She still sent him birthday cards and Christmas presents, but even that stopped. I don't know if he understood what was going on. I used to tell him that grandma was real sad that his mom died. I made up damn excuses and lies to try and protect my kid. And I never got why she did it. Kurt was part of her family too, you know. But she didn't care. Kurt was just the kid of her dead daughter.

So it almost gave me a second heart attack to see Kurt's grandma, my ex-mother-in-law, at my front door during Kurt's senior year. She just smiled like it was nothing. Told me she got my address from my parents. And I could only stare at the woman. I mean she had freaking missed out on 10 years of Kurt's life and here she was. Pissed me off and I admit I wanted to slam the damn door in her face. But this woman was still Kurt's grandma, so I let her in.

She told me I looked good, made the damn small talk. Then she asked to see Kurt. I wanted to tell her I was surprised that she even remembered who Kurt was. But she was there and maybe it was a start, you know. So I showed her where Kurt was with Blaine in the living room. Kurt gave me a look. And I didn't know if I'd done right by him by letting this woman into our house. But I hoped that maybe it was something.

The woman didn't stay very long. But before she left, she told me thank you. I never knew what she meant by that.

But things just went on after that. Neither me nor Kurt brought it up. I knew that she never thought I was good enough for her daughter. I was a JC drop-out. And she seemed to always remind me of it. When Kurt's mom got pregnant with him, that woman didn't like it. Told us that we weren't ready for a kid. I mean hell I had barely been in my 20s when Kurt was born. But I knew that this kid was the most important thing in my life. I think after a while, she came around to the fact that me and her daughter weren't changing. But you know, I may be a junior college drop-out but I manned up. I raised my kid the best I could and I was proud of the man he was.

So things went on fine. Kurt's grandma wasn't really mentioned again. I had asked Kurt about it afterwards, but the kid just shrugged. Said it was fine. So I believed him. And we moved on.

And it was let go. Me and Carole started figuring out how the heck we were going to send Finn and Kurt to college. Kurt got accepted into that Parsons school. I knew my kid would. He was good and he was going to get out of Lima. He had a shot.

But Finn was different. He told me he didn't want to go off to a big university. He wanted to go to junior college first. And I got that. Some kids weren't ready for that. I think he felt bad that he wasn't going to some big college like his friends. Hell, even that Noah Puckerman kid was going to some 4 year place. He told me he didn't want to be a _Lima Loser_. And I felt for him, you know. Here was a guy who had been the top dude in high school. Now he was going off to JC trying to figure out what the hell he was doing. He was jealous of Kurt, I think. My kid had this new life, I guess, waiting for him. But Finn was still staying here in Lima with his mom and step-dad. I told him it was okay. That just because he wasn't leaving Lima didn't make him a loser. It made him smart. Finn was getting his priorities straight. And that just made him a better man. I hoped he got what I was saying.

I watched him and he really tried his senior year. He did his homework and studied. A couple times I walked into Kurt and Blaine trying to help him with his math homework. Blaine was talking about football and basketball and shapes and stuff. And it seemed like Finn was getting it. And that Blaine seemed to be enjoying it. All three of them sat at the kitchen table for a few hours just helping each other. And I remember thinking that it was cool of that Blaine to help Kurt's step-brother out like that.

But, sometimes it was tough with Finn. I mean I wasn't his dad or anything. And really who was I except the dude who married his mom, right? I had expected Finn to tell me I wasn't his dad or something like that when he got pissed, but he never did. I think it might have been easier for him to accept me, you know? The guy never knew his dad. So Carole was all he knew. Not like Kurt. Kurt knew his mom. He loved her. She was there. And Carole once told me that she never expected Kurt to call her mom or love her like a mom. She knew that _mom_ was a name only for Kurt's mom. And I know Kurt could never look at her like a mom no matter what she did. And I think that was okay for both of them.

But, we got on. And Finn had really changed since he called my kid a _fag_ in the basement. And I was proud of him. He really tried with Kurt, you know. And Kurt really tried with Finn. Watching them made me wish that Kurt's mom and me had given him a brother or sister because I think that would've helped him. But there's nothing I could do about it. At least Kurt got his brother now.

Something I learned is that we were a family. We made this family. You know, I never expected to marry anyone else or have this step-son in my life. I thought it was going to be me and Kurt until he went to college. And then it'd be me and my shop. But family happened. And it was more than just freaking blood ties. I mean look at Kurt's grandma. As much as I loved my wife, that woman – Kurt's grandma – wasn't family after she died. And family is people who love each other.

And I guess we were one of those "new" families I keep hearing about.

****(****)****(****)****

**Blaine -**

**I hope you get this before you take off for the Thanksgiving.**

**Anyways, we'll see you next week. Are you guys going to see your parents?**

**Take care kid. Have a good trip. Sorry for the smudges. My mail guy came and I had to hurry to get this out.**

**Burt**

****(****)****(****)****

From the Office of Blaine Anderson, Esquire

Mr. Burt Hummel,

Blaine Anderson, Esquire, is out of the office for the holiday. This letter is to inform you that your correspondance has been received and will be processed and handled in a timely manner. If you have any further questions, please contact .

Regards,

The Office of Nelson, Cartland, Thomas and Anderson

****(****)****(****)****

From: Blaine Anderson  
Subject: Chapter  
To: Burt Hummel

Hi Burt,

I got your chapter today. I apologize if they sent you a form letter. Good thing I went to check in at the office one last time before we left. My intern got confused and thought you were a client of mine.

Anyways, Kurt and I will probably go to see my parents – or I may just go by myself. It's not that I'm ashamed of Kurt, but it's just so much easier to deal with my dad on my own. I'm not ashamed of who I am or my marriage, but it's hard to sit there at a table with my father. Kurt and I have talked about this and he might just hang out with you guys, while I go make an appearance. I feel like I owe it to my mom to at least try. So, I think that's what's going to happen.

Moving on, I read over your work. I remember that day when Kurt's grandma came over. I know it was shocking for everyone. I honestly don't really know what happened because I excused myself from the room. Kurt didn't really tell me what happened and I didn't feel it my place to pry.

I can't speak for Finn, but for me, I'm proud to call you my father-in-law.

Take Care,  
Blaine

* * *

A/N:

Images: anisalee(.)livejournal(.)com(/)19714(.)html

Thank you so so so so so much for all your support! You guys don't know how much it means to me. I never expected to even reach over 100 reviews. So this is awesome. **YOU ALL ARE AWESOME!**

As always reviews/links/recs/alerts/etc are always appreciated!


	20. Chapter 19

I'll never forget the first time I saw Kurt in his mom's stomach. He looked like this alien blob and I couldn't tell which part was the head or a foot. But his mom thought he was the most beautiful thing she'd ever saw and I did too. I mean that was my boy on that screen. And when the doctors told us he was a him, it was like winning the Superbowl. It was freaking incredible, you know.

So when Kurt was actually getting ready to graduate McKinley, it was hard for me. I'll admit that. I remember sitting down with him and telling him how proud of him I was and how proud his mom would've been. Because he needed to know that. If there's one thing I wanted for him, it was that he knew his mom was still part of his life. Even if he didn't talk about her. He needed to know that. No matter what the hell was going on in my life, I never forgot about his mom.

When my kid walked across that stage, I couldn't have been prouder. Kurt had been through hell and he made it. He was strong and he proved to those asshole punks that he was just as good as them. It wasn't easy for him. And that Figgins didn't really do shit to protect him after he transferred back to McKinley. But my kid was a fighter. He didn't let anyone push him around. And damn if he wasn't more man than I could ever want to be. Kurt was strong. I know I've said it. But it's true.

Like when those punks decided it'd be funny to make my kid the senior prom queen. Finn called me from the dance and told me. And I wanted to go down to McKinley and fucking lay into someone. How the hell could they even allow that to be announced, you know? But Kurt didn't let it get him. He handled it the way his mom would've. He proudly wore the damn tiara the entire night and passed it off to his friends. Finn showed me a picture of him and a few kids from that glee club with Blaine wearing the tiara and another one where Finn had it on. They put them on their Face Space Book page thing and didn't let it get to them. That's why I say that glee club was one of the best things to happen to my kid. I don't know how many dudes would be willing to put on a tiara just to show a solid towards my son. I mean, even that Noah Puckerman put on the tiara and smiled for pictures. And you know, I knew my kid had found a good group of friends. I hoped when Kurt went off to New York, he'd stay friends with them.

At the end of the year, Kurt and Finn asked me and Carole if they could have some kind of glee goodbye party at the house. And we let them. They were good kids. Hell, even that Schuester showed up for a little while. These were good people. Even that Blaine kid. I mean, he was there for my kid. And he seemed to really love my kid. And even after they had done _it_, and I knew that they had _done it_ more than once – which I still didn't want to think about – Blaine stuck around. So, yeah the kid was okay.

But at that party, Blaine and Kurt seemed weird. You know, I watched them together before and they were kind of always on top of each other. Even Carole would tell me that it was like they were attached at the hip. And, yeah I worried that they were getting too close and I just didn't want my kid to get hurt when their relationship ended. So at that party, something was off between them. Almost like they were avoiding each other. But I figured it was cause all their friends were over.

But this went on even after the party. Blaine practically lived at my house on weekends and after school, but he just stopped being there. And I asked Kurt about it, but my kid just shrugged. Said they were both busy. And I believed him. They had spent so much time together that maybe they just need a freaking break.

I found out that they broke up one night. Kurt was sitting at the kitchen table and just told me. He said, "Blaine and I broke up," and went up to his room. And it shocked the hell out of me. But I knew that_ punk _Blaine would do something like that. The kid probably got accepted into one of those fancy ass universities and decided my kid wasn't good enough for him anymore. I mean, all the shit about Kurt being worth it and that he respected him was just utter bullshit.

My kid was worth so much more than that asshole Blaine Anderson. But you know, it was part of growing up. And you know, it was good for him to get that first heart break out of the way. Kurt had to go through a lot of shit in his life, but this relationship had been his first.

I remember I went up to his room and asked if he was okay. It was still kind of awkward for me to talk to him about guys. I mean, as much as I saw him and that Blaine together, I didn't know how the hell a gay relationship actually _worked_. I told him that there were other guys out there. I didn't know what else to say. I didn't know what the hell he needed me to say to him. I thought the kid might cry or something. Did he want me to hug him? I had no clue how to handle it. But then he told me that _he_ ended it with Blaine.

Kurt told me it was cause they were going to be too far from each other. Blaine was going to Ohio State and they'd never see each other. He thought they needed a break or something. And I didn't get it. I told Kurt that love was hard to come by. Heck, I had been alone for almost 10 years before I found Carole. But he just thought that it was better. I didn't get it. But you, know, maybe my kid was right.

Blaine had been the only dude Kurt had dated. And in the back of my head I still kind of thought it was cause Blaine was the first gay guy Kurt had known. So I let it go. My kid was old enough to make his own decisions.

And so, we sent him off to New York. And I'll tell you it was real difficult to watch Kurt get on that plane. I knew the kid would be going off to a dorm out there. They promised it was safe for him. It kind of hit me that my kid wasn't going to be in my house anymore. And it was shitty feeling know I couldn't see my son everyday or protect him from the punk asses out there. But he needed this, you know. He deserved to live his dream.

So Kurt was gone and all them kids from that glee club stopped coming by the house. They all went off to wherever and Finn was the only one left. I felt bad for the dude. I know he wanted to go off like all his friends, but like I said, he was being smart staying at home.

Anyways, so I was surprised when Blaine walked into my tire shop. He made up some bullshit excuse about needed parts. He asked how Kurt was doing. I told him good. I wasn't going to lie. Kurt loved it in that big city. I remember Blaine nodded and bought $150 worth of stuff from me. He asked if he could e-mail me if he needed help with the parts. I gave him my card. I told the kid I didn't check it often. I never really got into the whole internet computer thing. Kurt set it up in the shop for me to do inventory, but I'm a pen and paper kind of dude. I prefer to write out things. But most things have to be done online.

And I didn't think I'd hear from that guy again. But he sent me an e-mail asking about carburetors and tires. Then he starting asking about Kurt and telling me about his life and his dad. I mean, it wasn't like it happened over night. And you know, I thought he'd stop. But he didn't. And I learned a lot about the kid. And you know, he was a good kid. And I started to even like the guy. I think the kid just wanted to someone to talk to, you know. Someone who wouldn't judge him.

And I remember telling him that it sucks what happened between him and Kurt. And he told me Kurt had been his first love, and really first anything. So maybe I was wrong that this kid was this smooth talking, experienced punk. The kid was just as clueless as Kurt. I hoped the kid would be okay.

****(****)****(****)****

From: Burt Hummel  
Subject: Hey  
To: Blaine Anderson  
Attachment: ()

Blaine –

I hope everything is going good at your parent's house. Kurt told me you're going to stay there for a couple days and then come back here.

I'm e-mailing this to you so you have it.

See you in a few days for Thanksgiving.

-Burt

****(****)****(****)****

From: Blaine Anderson  
Subject: Re: Hey  
To: Burt Hummel

Things at my parents' are okay. I know what to expect, so it's okay. My mom tries. My dad refuses to discuss anything that has to do with my "lifestyle." It just really fucking sucks. I can't even bring Kurt over because he's just so damn stubborn. I just can't believe he's like this even after all this fucking time.

From: Blaine Anderson  
Subject: Re: Hey  
To: Burt Hummel

Hey Burt,

I'm sorry about my e-mail earlier. I got into an argument with my dad and read your chapter – I just hate thinking about that time in college without Kurt. My emotions got the better of me and I took it out on your e-mail. I didn't mean to do that.

Anyways, thanks for sending your chapter to me. Kurt's really curious when it comes to this. I've caught him trying to look at the one's you sent me in hard copy.

I'm sorry for not sending you a better response. I'm just really tired from dealing with this all day.

Take Care,  
Blaine

****(****)****(****)****

From: Burt Hummel  
Subject: Re: Hey  
To: Blaine Anderson

Blaine –

It's okay. I understand. We're here for you kid.

-Burt

****(****)****(****)****

Text:

To: Blaine Anderson

My dad just told me about your dad. Why didn't you call me? I'm worried. Can you talk? If I don't hear from you in two minutes, I'm calling you.

To: Kurt Hummel-Anderson

It's just the same shit with my dad. Missing you. Wish I could just be with you right now.

To: Blaine Anderson

I'm calling you...have your phone on.

****(****)****(****)****

From: Blaine Anderson  
Subject: Re: Hey  
To: Burt Hummel

Hey Burt,

Thanks! I'm doing better. Talking to Kurt always makes me feel better. Just hearing his voice is enough. I'm probably going to come back to your house early. It all depends on my dad.

Take Care,  
Blaine

* * *

Images: anisalee(.)livejournal(.)com(/)20032(.)html

A/N: I cannot say thank you enough for all your support! Just you guys are AMAZING!

As always: reviews/recs/links/alerts/etc. are always appreciated!


	21. Chapter 20

I drove by the old house this morning. It's still the same. The people who own it didn't change the paint. It just looks like they put a fresh coat of paint on it. The mailbox is different. But other than that it was the same place where my kid grew up. And you know, I missed that house. I worked real hard to get the down payment and I fixed up all the plumbing and electricity, the right way, if I do say so myself. That place was the first thing I was really proud to give my family. Kurt's mom loved it there. She had all these plans of putting in a pool and a garden in the backyard. We never got around to it. But I do remember she wanted yellow tulips and tomato plants.

When we moved to the new, bigger house that Carole helped pay the down payment for – which sucked for me – it was a big deal. I hated that she had to pay for any of it. I wanted to take care of her. But she said we were in it together. Kurt and Finn didn't know how much Carole and me scraped together to get them that house. And when Kurt went to that Dalton, me and her mortgaged the house. We even got this small loan from the bank. But you know, Kurt's safety was more important than freaking money. Even when Kurt went back to McKinley, money was still tight. But I knew my kid was smart and he got himself a big scholarship. One that paid for the tuition and part of his dorm room. And the Kurt was doing good out there, you know. He called me every Friday night after the family dinner tradition that his mom started.

I know Kurt loved it out there. He talked about that city like he had grew up there. Talked about going down to that Mick Queen place on 14th Street or going to Mark and Jacobs place on 4th Street. I didn't really get it. But it meant something to him. And as long as the kid was doing good. I was okay. I wasn't real happy to have my son that far from me, but it was okay.

At the time, I didn't tell him about Blaine coming to the shop or e-mailing me. I mean, hell, Blaine deserved someone he could trust too, right? And as much as I didn't like him at the beginning, kid was proving to be more, you know. I thought he was just some punk ass who'd drop Kurt the moment something else came along. But he didn't. Like I told him before, as long as he kept e-mailing me, I'd reply. Like they say, as long as there's sand in the desert, it'll be dry.

I guess what kind of changed my opinion on the kid was when he asked me to go with him to the doctors. He was having some minor surgery to have a large mole removed from his back. They did it right in the office, but the guy couldn't drive himself home. So, yeah, I went and sat there waiting for him. Took him back to my house after and let him sleep for a couple hours in Kurt's old room. I remember he came downstairs and we watched a game. I felt bad for the kid. I wanted to ask why his parents weren't there for him. Or why he asked me. The kid seemed like he'd be popular, I'm guessing he had a lot of friends.

He went back to his dorm that same night. But you know, he told me some stuff before he went under the knife at the doctors. Like how much he loved my kid. And I knew my boy was doing what he thought was right. But maybe, I don't know, he wasn't right here. I don't know. Blaine seemed to be genuine.

Anyways, you know I always try to just do what's right. I live my life. I'm a simple dude. I don't like to get into complicated crap. Aside from the shit that happened to Kurt at McKinley and having to go in and defend my kid's right to feel safe at school, I don't really make waves, you know. I just do my job and love my family. And so, when Blaine started to become a bigger part of my life, I didn't really know what to do. I mean, I was talking to my son's ex-boyfriend. Which was weird, cause like I said, I didn't really like the guy to begin with. I don't know. Maybe it was weird for him too, you know? But for some reason he kept sending those e-mails.

And I knew that first year of college was hard on him. Hell, it was hard on me and I didn't even go to school. With Kurt telling me about all the stuff he was doing and Finn doing projects and papers. But with Blaine, he had a tough time. I guess some stuff went down with his father. People tell me that I'm real understanding of homosexuality cause my kid's gay. And that I'm a pretty open guy. Truth is, I just love my kid. I'd love him if he'd converted to blue and dyed his hair orange. I guess Blaine's dad didn't like the fact that his son was gay. And I felt for the guy. He deserved to be accepted by his parents. I may not be a smart man, but I do know that.

Blaine was (and still is) the kind of guy who really tries to be this put together dude. I had to force him to stop calling me Mr. Hummel and sir. I was used to Finn and Kurt and they way they talked and how they were. But Blaine was different. He was always polite and "well read" – as Carole calls him – in his e-mails to me. And I guess he was trying to prove something to someone, maybe his dad. Like when Kurt dressed up and sang Mellencamp for me.

And it was after that first year when Finn applied to a bigger university. The guy had gotten good grades. Carole and me were real proud of him. Then Kurt came home for the summer. And let me tell you, having my kid back under my roof was a relief. I didn't realize how much I'd missed him til he stepped into the baggage area of the airport. He had gotten his hair cut, looked a little older, but he was still my boy.

It wasn't even a month after Kurt got home that I caught him and Blaine, you know, _together_ in Kurt's room. I guess I'd never understand those two. They came downstairs and I remember Blaine had this look on his face and so did Kurt. And for the first time since Blaine came into the picture, I believed that they really loved each other. When Blaine left, Kurt told me they had bumped into each other a grocery store and stuff happened.

And you know what? For the first time, I was okay with my kid being in love with another guy. At the time I didn't know what happened between them two. But I hoped it'd last for them. They _both_ deserved to be happy. Even a kid like Blaine – especially a kid like Blaine. Guy had a rough time and maybe he was just like everyone else in the world. Hell, it took me years to get my shit together. I guess under all that hair gel and smooth talking, Blaine was just a teenager like Kurt and Finn trying to figure his way in this fucked up world.

****(****)****(****)****

From: Burt Hummel  
Subject: Next Part  
To: Blaine Anderson  
Attachment: ()

Blaine –

Here's the next part.

I'm sorry things with your dad didn't go well. But tomorrow should be good. Carole's been up half the morning making pies and cakes and stuff. And Finn's family is coming in later this afternoon.

Burt

****(****)****(****)****

From: Blaine Anderson  
Subject: Re: Next Part  
To: Burt Hummel

Hey Burt,

Thanks. I was hoping things would go better, but I've just resigned myself to the fact that as long as I don't talk about my personal life, then things with my father will be okay.

Kurt and I are probably going to be out all day. We're going to go see a movie and have dinner somewhere. I think we're also going to try and see Brittany when she gets off from her shift at the Lima Emergency Animal Hospital (I still can't believe that girl was not only able to get into veterinary school but get her license to be a vet). Although, we've heard from Santana and Rachel that she's actually a really good vet and apparently she specializes in cats. Go figure.

I've skimmed your chapter. (I made the mistake of agreeing to go with Kurt to the fabric store and now I can't get him out. We've been here for almost three hours. I found a chair next to the amateur patterns and I'm waiting it out.) It's difficult for me to discuss my dad. I know that he's doing what he thinks is right and what he believes in. He just doesn't want a gay son and that's what it is. I objectively understand him. I used to see it when I was doing my summer associate in law school. Parents would try and commit their children to psych wards or want to get them "help" because they were part of the GLBT community. They thought they were doing the best thing for their kids. However, emotionally, I'm not as understanding. When I was a teenager, I wanted him to tell me he was proud of me, so badly. Now, I live in the real world and know that's probably never going to happen.

Anyways, when Kurt and I got back together, it was unexpected. I certainly never expected to be with him ever again. As you know, I was trying to moving on with my life, but things happen. I'll always be grateful that he and I were in that grocery store at the same time. I like to think we would have gotten back together, even if we hadn't run into each other, but I'm glad I never have to find out. Still, I apologize that you found us like _that_.

I know this is going to sound corny, but thank you for letting me be part of your Thanksgiving dinner. I don't think I could sit there at my house.

Anyways, Kurt looks like he's just about done. I'll see you when we get back.

Take Care,  
Blaine

_Sent from my BlackBerry_

****(****)****(****)****

From: Burt Hummel  
Subject: Re: Next Part  
To: Blaine Anderson

Blaine –

You're me and Carole's son-in-law. Where else would we want you to be?

Burt

****(****)****(****)****

A/N: Sorry it took so long to get this out to you guys. I was inundated with final papers/tests at university.

Anyways, question for you guys. Sometimes I write out a sketch of a scene in order to be able to write the chapter. Would you guys be interested in reading those scene sketches? They aren't fully developed and sometimes are just dialogue. For example, I wrote out the Blaine/Kurt break up and make up scenes just to get into that headspace. They're rough, but would anyone be interested in reading them?

Also, all the typos, the language, the grammar, the repeating themes are all part of the story. They are intentional. I don't know if that's been clear. For example, Mick Queen is intentional, I know it's McQueen (I'm actually hugely into fashion so it slightly hurts my sensibilities to misspell the names LOL).

There are no images for this chapter :)

Thank you all so so so much! I wish I could personally respond to every one of you, but approaching 200 reviews! It's almost impossible for me to. But know that I read every single comment left and they make me smile. I'm blown away.

As always reviews/links/recs/alerts/etc. are always appreciated!


	22. Chapter 21

I know I've said before that Kurt's mom died suddenly. Her car was hit by a damn drunk driver. It's still hard for me to think about that day. She had left to go get some groceries. The store wasn't even 5 miles from the house. The cops called my shop. I'll never forget the words. "Sir, your wife has been in an accident." That's what they said. And I got Kurt from school and got to the hospital. No one would tell me a damn thing. They just kept telling me to wait.

They sent out a group of doctors. A whole fucking group. Then one just blurted it out. "I'm sorry sir. There was nothing we could do." Nothing they could do. They're doctors! Isn't that what they get paid the big money for? To save people's lives. Why couldn't they save her life? They do stuff like that every day. That's their job. But nothing they could do? They tried to tell me all the medical jargon crap. How she was hit and internal bleeding. I didn't give a shit about technical stuff. They needed to take it back and go back there and do what they do and make her okay.

I remember looking at my kid sitting there. I made him a promise that his mom would be okay. That everything was going to be okay. And it was all a stupid fucking lie. And shit, how do you tell an 8 year old that his mom went out to get food and her car was hit so fucking hard that she died? Kurt gave me this look, you know. I could tell he was thinking. Then the crying started and the world just fucking crumbled.

I saw her. Kurt sat with a nurse. But I saw her. They cleaned her up before they let me see her. Took out all the tubes and stuff. She was beautiful. Just like the first day I seen her. I didn't say anything to her. I don't think she would've heard me. Wherever she was. People say that you die and go to a _better place_. I hoped that was true for her.

It didn't hit me that she was _dead _till I got Kurt home. She had always done that night routine stuff with him. Making sure he brushed his teeth and face and put him to bed. But then she wasn't there. And I had to do all that. I did it wrong. Kurt told me that night that I told him to do the stuff in the wrong order. He told me he would do it by himself. I really didn't fucking know how to handle it. The kid had always looked forward to his night time stuff with his mom. He would tell his mom about his day. I'd hear him and his mom laughing all the way down the hall. I never knew what about. But that was their relationship. They had their secrets. Maybe I should've asked her about it one time.

I think the morning after she died was the toughest. Kurt asked me where _mom_ was. And I had to tell him a second time his mom was dead. Kid thought it had been a dream. For a split second when I woke up, I thought it was a dream too. I even reached over to her side of the bed. But I had to deal with it and suck it up and move on. That's what I had been taught on the football team. You just suck it up and move on. Men just deal with it. So, yeah that's what I tried to do till I found Kurt wrapped in his mom's dress, crying in the corner of his room. Like I said, when he was baby, I promised to protect him. But I couldn't. Not from that. And that was the worst damn feeling. How the hell was I supposed to move on when my kid was going through hell? And maybe I should've done stuff differently the days after his mom died. But no one expects this.

And I didn't know how the hell to be this full time parent. I mean I tried. But to see Kurt now. I don't know if it was cause of me or cause the kid was just good at taking care of himself. He learned to do his own stuff without me. I don't know. Maybe that's why Blaine and him worked. They were both independent. Good at being on their own. I guess they were meant to be together. Maybe that's why they got back together in college.

You know, I thought maybe once Kurt and him got back together, Blaine would stop e-mailing me. But he still did. He was just kind of always there. I don't know. I guess I never thought I'd ever really talk to my kid's _boyfriend_. I thought maybe Kurt'd whip him out at holidays and stuff and Carole would force me to make some sort of talk with the guy. But this was different.

Carole and me talked about it before. Like I said, I guess cause Kurt always looked so young, it scared me that some guy would take advantage of him, you know. I was worried. I still worry about him. I guess that's part of being a dad. Kurt was it for me for a long time. He was my boy. He was part of his mom. And yeah, sometimes it was hard to look at him and not think of her. But he's my son. I'd do anything for him.

When he had that fashion project runway student showcase thing for school, Carole and me were on the first plane out. Even Blaine ended up coming. And hell if I understood the outfits he created, but the kid had the best damn show. The kid was happy. As a dad, it's what I wanted for him, you know.

But watching my kid in New York made me realize he was an adult. My kid was a grown up and when the hell did that happen? He had this life in this city. He had new friends. And these kids got to see him every day. Something I didn't get to do. And I know it bothered Blaine. Kurt would laugh at something or say something and him and his friends would get it. I didn't know my kid's life there. And you know, I knew more about Blaine's life than Kurt's.

So I called Kurt more, tried out that Skyper thing and texted him. He was this new guy. Stronger, smarter, more mature, I guess. My kid had done good in the city. And if he would've went to OSU or some other college in Ohio, I don't think he would of.

But the boy still worried about me. And I hated it. My kid wasn't supposed to worry about me. I'm the parent, not him. So Carole and me – well me – didn't tell him when the doctor was concerned about the old ticker. They put me in the damn hospital for 2 days to "watch" me. I didn't want Kurt to know. I mean the kid had been through so much shit already. I know him. He'd drop all his stuff and come to Lima. To what? Sit by the bed and watch me eat damn Jello? There are some things parents just need to lie to their kids about. Yeah it sucks. But it's true. Hell, me and Carole kept it a secret this whole damn time. Like I said it's a parent's job to protect their kids. And Kurt didn't need to know that. He needed to go do his clothes thing.

Now I'm not saying it's okay to lie to your kids all the time. Cause that's not right. Like the time when Kurt asked me where his mom went after she died. I told him Heaven. When he asked me what that was, I told him I didn't know. I didn't. I wasn't raised religious. Do I think there's a Heaven? Yeah, probably. But what it is. I have no idea. My mom told me I should've lied to the kid. Told him his mom was in a beautiful place with gardens and all of that stuff. But I couldn't cause that'd be lying to him. I told him wherever his mom was, I was sure she'd be happy. I don't know. Maybe that's when all the him not believing in God stuff started. If he didn't want to believe in God then that was his choice. I do, but he's allowed to have his own opinion. I guess, I hope someday he'll be okay with it all. His mom's death and God and religion and stuff. But yeah, he was a good kid. He's a good man. I don't know. Maybe it's just cause he's like his mom.

****(****)****(****)****

**TEXT Messages**

From: Kurt Hummel-Anderson  
Where are you?

From: Blaine Anderson  
I'm okay. I'll explain everything when I get back.

From: Burt Hummel  
We missed you at breakfast kid. Kurt said he woke up and you were gone. He said he text you. But you didn't answer. Things okay?

From: Blaine Anderson  
My dad asked me to meet him and my mom for breakfast since I didn't do Thanksgiving with them. I didn't tell Kurt. Didn't want him to worry. Will be back in an hour. I'll tell him where I was when I get back.

***(****)****(****)****

From: Burt Hummel  
Subject: Here  
To: Blaine Anderson  
Attachment: (PT21)

Blaine –

I'm sorry that things with your dad didn't go good when you were here. Kurt called me earlier and said you guys got in okay.

Carole said she'd send you some pictures from Thanksgiving. I don't know how her and Kurt managed to make that much food. You know, there's still tons of it in the fridge. Finn's taking a bunch back with him.

And thanks for helping with the shop legal papers. Take care of yourself kid.

Burt

***(****)****(****)****

From: Blaine Anderson  
Subject: Re: Here  
To: Burt Hummel

Hey Burt,

No problem with the legal papers. It wasn't that difficult and it's not like it really took much effort. I'm glad I could help you get organized.

The food was amazing. I didn't know that macaroni and cheese could taste that good. I wanted to ask Carole for the recipe, but you know Kurt. He's still worried about my health even though it's been months. I took him to a doctor's appointment with me and they even told him I was healthy, but he's still anxious.

I read over what you wrote. I can't believe you were in the hospital and didn't tell anyone. I get why you didn't want anyone to know, but I know Kurt's going to be upset. He actually asked me if we should buy a defibrillator when you visit – I had to remind him that neither one of us has a medical degree, nor do we know how to work one. He worries a lot. He doesn't like to admit it, but he does. That's what concerns me. I'm afraid he's going to get sick worrying about everyone else; especially me.

You're right about Kurt having a new life in New York. I felt that way too. It actually wasn't until I moved here that I felt like I was really part of his life again. I do know that he loves you. You're his priority over everyone else – as it should be.

I wish I could have met Kurt's mom. If not only to shake the hand of the woman who gave me Kurt. I believe in God and Heaven, Burt. I think that's where she went when she died. Kurt and I may disagree on religion, but I whole heartedly believe that your wife's in a place that is full of love and happiness.

Take Care,

Blaine

***(****)****(****)****

A/N: Thank you so much for your comments last chapter! I'm kind of shocked at the response! :) I'm so glad you all have enjoyed it up until this point.

Images: anisalee(.)livejournal(.)com(/)20597(.)html

As always: reviews/recs/links/alerts/etc. are always appreciated!


	23. Chapter 22

Christmas was the first real holiday I spent with Kurt's mom. We had been on two dates and I bought her some flowers that the woman suggested and one of them candy cane hearts – I thought it was very romantic of me. Things went fast between us. I guess I didn't think of marriage as this commitment. But it was. I was just this dumbass dude. Sure, I got her a ring from the department store at the mall and proposed on one knee. But it never occurred to me that being married was this huge deal. I was used to fucking around with the guys on weekends and doing whatever I wanted. You know, me and my buddies used to ride around in a Pontiac LeMans and just hang out.

When I married Kurt's mom, I had to stop being an idiot. And we moved into this little apartment. It wasn't much. Just a one bedroom thing with a washer and dryer. It was $300 a month. Which at the time was a whole hell of a lot of money to me. I mean at the shop where I part timed I was paid under the table. And not very good. I started getting bills and shit addressed to _Mr. Burt Hummel_. I'll tell you, that first 6 months were hell. I'm surprised she didn't divorce me. I think we had maybe $50 in our savings account at the end of the day. But you know, it taught me commitment and responsibility. I realized that being a man wasn't about the size of your dick and not being labeled a "_fag_._"_ But being a man was growing up and taking care of your shit. So yeah, I pulled my head out of my ass and manned up for her. And then we got Kurt.

But my point is that marriage is a big deal, you know. It's not just this fancy party where people go and give you stuff. It's a real damn thing. And it's hard. Even when I married Carole, it was rough at first. Everyone learning to live together and me and her had to figure out how the hell we were going to make it work. It wasn't easy. She was used to her stuff her way and I had my ways of doing stuff. You know, dating someone and living with them are two different things. Even when me and Carole moved in that first time, it wasn't for very long and I didn't really know what it was like to _live_ with her.

I think I'll always remember that day when Kurt called and told me that him and Blaine were getting married. It was a day where I had four tire blow outs and some guy's engine was making a "ca-ching vroom ca-ching" sound and two of my guys had called off. So it was just me. Kurt called the shop and put me on that damn speaker phone and three way calling thing with Carole. I hate that thing. You can't hear shit when it's on. And he just blurted out that Blaine had went to visit him and now they were getting married. I was stunned, but Carole sounded happy. She kept asking about who proposed and when they wanted to get married. And I thought for sure that Blaine had asked Kurt. My kid ain't no girl, but he likes all that romantic stuff. But you know, I guess I shouldn't assume nothing. You know that saying about asses of you and me. Cause Kurt was the one who had asked. And my reaction, I guess wasn't what Kurt wanted to hear. I didn't know what to say at the time. Marriage is this huge thing and my kid was only 21.

And you know what shocked and disgusted the hell out of me? I had a problem with it. I had fought for my kid to have the same goddamned opportunities as all the other kids out there. You know, how many times I was in that Principal Figgins office at McKinley? I raised a shit storm when there was a "propriety" concern to have Kurt and Blaine go to prom together. I drove my ass down to that school over a freaking solo just so my kid could have a shot. And all that BS with Karofsky. I shouldn't of had a problem at all. And I was disgusted with myself over it. I didn't tell Kurt. But I just couldn't come to grips with it. Blaine made him happy. So why shouldn't I just accept it and be happy that my kid was happy? As much as I tried at first I just couldn't.

Kurt would call me and e-mail me plans and ideas for the wedding. He'd ask me what I thought of the color icetrine or charcoal or whatever color. They looked all the same to me. And I was supportive as I could be. But I just kind of hoped that him and Blaine would figure it out on their own. I didn't want to think about it cause I couldn't freaking understand my problem. It all seemed to be happening so fast. I couldn't even think about it because Kurt'd send me something else to look at.

Then my kid asked me if I'd stand up for both him and Blaine at the wedding. And I hesitated. And he heard it. Kurt freaked out and blamed me for not accepting Blaine and him. It wasn't that. Okay, yeah maybe at first I was a little surprised by it all. But they were both just out of college, you know. And they had been back together for a few years but they fought. They fought about the distance and shit like that. I didn't think they were ready. I mean Blaine and him never even lived together before. They were in different states. And all of sudden they were just going to get married and live together and be fully committed to each other. So yeah I was concerned. And I think that was what I thought my problem was. How they hell were they going to support each other? Blaine wanted to go to law school and Kurt had a fashion degree. They weren't going to make any money.

Carole and me had a long talk about the wedding and marriage and commitment stuff. And she told me that my problem wasn't thinking they weren't ready. My problem was I wasn't ready to let my kid go. I didn't think she was right. Kurt had been in that city without me for 4 years. But you know, after a while I realized she was right. You got to understand that my whole life revolved around Kurt after his mom died. All the things I did were to make his childhood happy. I didn't want the kid to feel like he wasn't loved. And I think I became dependant on him in a way. Not in the way that I needed him to do things for me. But that he was a part of his mom. I needed him to be okay for his mom. You know? I guess that probably sounds like some crap. But it's true. Kurt was the damn greatest gift anyone ever gave me. And if he married Blaine, that'd be it. Game over. And I didn't want to lose that. Lose my kid.

And I knew that my kid wasn't dying or nothing. He was just going to be marrying someone. But I knew what was happening. I was losing my kid. And growing up as a part of life be damned. I wanted my kid to just stop for a second. I think all parents have that freaking moment where you look at your kid and they aren't your kid any more. They're this adult. And it's like this pain in your gut. But what do you do?

****(****)****(****)****

From: Kurt Hummel-Anderson  
Subject: Blaine's Interview  
To: Dad  
CC: Blaine , Carole , Finn , Mercedes , Rachel , Tina-Mike Chang , Dr. Brittany DVM …more

Hi everyone!

I wanted to share with you all Blaine's interview he did with the Gay City News. It's a smaller publication here in NYC, but my husband deserves all the praise he can get!

- Attachment -

**GAY CITY NEWS**  
_Staff_

Blaine Anderson is not your typical New York attorney at the prestigious Nelson, Cartland, Thomas and Anderson law firm. Anderson is the youngest and first gay person to make the leap to partner at only 27 years old. _Gay City News_ first became acquainted with Anderson at a benefit for The Brummel House, in which his husband (fashion designer Kurt Hummel_-Anderson_) founded. Recently, we sat down with Anderson to discuss his work in the GLBT community and his fight for gay rights.

GCN: How long have you been working at Nelson, Cartland and Thomas law firm?

BA: I started right after I graduated from law school. So, I've been there for three years.

GCN: Only three years and already a partner?

BA: I was just as surprised too.

GCN: You do a lot of work for the GLBT community here in New York. Can you tell us a little about what you're involved with?

BA: I volunteer with the Trevor Project when I can. Occasionally, I'll take on some pro bono cases where GLBT community members have been wrongfully terminated or discriminated against at school or at their place of employment due to their sexuality. Also, I try to volunteer as much as I can at The Brummel House.

GCN: The Brummel House is founded by Kurt Hummel-Anderson?

BA: Yes.

GCN: Speaking of which, you're married to Mr. Hummel-Anderson.

BA: Yes, Kurt and I are married.

GCN: How long have you two been married?

BA: Six years. We got married right after I got my undergraduate degree.

GCN: Did you marry here in New York?

BA: Yes we did. Unfortunately, our home state still doesn't recognize gay marriage.

GCN: But you're working to try and change state laws to recognize gay marriage.

BA: I'm only licensed to practice law in New York, but I have given seminars to groups of attorney's in other states that don't recognize gay marriage. I also work with gay rights activism groups across the country when time permits – especially those groups in our home state.

GCN: Ohio?

BA: Yes. Kurt and I would like to see our marriage recognized there one day.

GCN: Have you ever had a client who chose not to work with you because you're gay?

BA: Not necessarily with clients, but I have experienced discrimination. It usually occurs when someone sees my wedding ring and asks about my wife. Fortunately, my firm hasn't treated me any different than a straight, married man.

GCN: Can you tell us a little more about some of the projects you're working on for GLBT rights?

BA: Sure. I'm working with a few other New York based attorney's to try and change policies in the work place so that domestic partners and spouses of GLBT employees can receive insurance benefits. We are also trying to change hospital policies to allow those who are in GLBT relationships access to their partners and spouses without hesitations. Even though New York legalized gay and lesbian marriage, it's far from equal. In a case study, 37% of hospital staff members still denied a married gay person access to their spouse, despite the fact that marriage entitles spouses access to each other.

GCN: That's scary.

BA: I know. My husband and I also experienced that in a lesser degree. I was admitted to the hospital a while back and the staff wasn't going to allow him to come back with me until he provided proof that he was my husband. Luckily, he hyphenated his last name with mine and changed his ID to reflect this. However, there are gays and lesbians who do not hyphenate and that could cause a problem in a hospital setting.

GCN: I'd imagine that since you're a lawyer, you have covered both of yourselves legally.

BA: I have. Our paperwork is very clear, concise and legal. If something were to happen to one of us, the other would have a legal paper trail that no court could deny. Unfortunately, this is another problem for GLBT people. They don't always have that paper trail. With the help of my colleagues, we're working to make it easier for GLBT people in relationships to be afforded the same rights to their loved one's as a straight person.

GCN: Sounds like a big task to take on, but we wish you all the best.

BA: Thank you.

GCN: Thank you.

****(****)****(****)****

From: Finn Hudson  
Subject: Congrats  
To: Blaine Anderson  
CC: Kurt Hummel-Anderson

Congrats bro-in-law!

****(****)****(****)****

From: Mercedes  
Subject: WOW!  
To: Blaine Anderson  
CC: Kurt Hummel-Anderson

Congrats Blaine! You're on your way to being a bigger diva then me!

Kurt get your ass on the phone and call me sometime!

XOXOXO

Mercedes

****(****)****(****)****

From: Carole  
Subject: Congratulations!  
To: Blaine Anderson

Congratulations Blaine! It's a fantastic article. I'm so glad you're being recognized for all the great work you do!

Love,

Carole

****(****)****(****)****

From: Blaine Anderson  
Subject: Thank You  
To: Kurt Hummel-Anderson , Burt Hummel , Carole Hudson , Finn Hudson ,  
CC: Mercedes Jones , Rachel Berry , Tina-Mike Chang , Dr. Brittany Pierce …more

Hey guys!

Thank you so much for all the congratulations through e-mail, phone calls and texts. I appreciate it and to answer your questions (Wes and David especially) Kurt and I would love to see you all. We're thinking about having everyone over for New Years Eve. Let us know if you are free.

Take Care,  
Blaine

****(****)****(****)****

From: Burt Hummel  
Subject: Next One  
To: Blaine Anderson  
Attachment: ()

Blaine –

I liked that article. You've done a lot kid. Just don't forget to take care of yourself. You know you hear of them lawyers that stress out and then have a stroke or a heart attack or something in the office.

Burt

****(****)****(****)****

From: Blaine Anderson  
Subjec: Re: Next One  
To: Burt Hummel

Hey Burt,

Thank you. I appreciate it.

Kurt told me the same thing when he read the article. I'm going to be around for a while and please don't worry about me. You need to take care of yourself too.

I read over your chapter and I suspected as much. I remember when Kurt told me you were hesitant about us getting married. He assumed it was because we were gay, but I didn't think so. You were right in that it did feel like we just decided to get married. I wasn't even expecting it – Kurt and I had never talked about it before. Then he just asked me and I love your son and knew that I wanted to spend the rest of my life with him. So, of course I said yes. You're right though, marriage is a huge commitment. I don't know if Kurt and I fully understood everything at the time, but we do now.

I never thought we'd get married right after college and you're right that we fought. The long distance was difficult on us and I don't know how we made it through, but we did.

Anyways, I need to get some work done. We're closing down the office for two weeks for Christmas and I really don't want to be doing briefings over the break.

Speaking of which, for Christmas, we're putting Finn and his family up at a hotel a block away from the apartment. Do you and Carole want to stay with us or at a hotel? You can just text one of us when you decide.

Take Care,  
Blaine

****(****)****(****)****

*Percentage in Blaine's interview is completely made up*

A/N: So this is going to be semi-longer. I want to address some concerns and things that have come up.

I just want to confirm that I am anisalee on livejournal and fanfiction(dot)net. I got a few e-mails saying that I was being plagiarized with a link that went back to my livejournal. That's me. If the title is "Burt Hummel's Guide to Raising a Teenage Son," then it's me. However, if you find my words being used in a completely different story that's plagiarism.

Second, the grammar mistakes and misspellings are part of the story. One phrase that is on purpose (for example) is "wouldn't of" which would be "wouldn't have" if I weren't writing it in Burt's perspective. As much as I appreciated some of the full beta'd chapters I received, the story is supposed to be like that. :)

I also want to point out that every chapter pretty much follows a same pattern. However, every subject of the chapters is different. I have notes upon notes of topics and things that Burt will possibly cover. Of course, he's going to talk about Kurt's mom a lot because she was the love of his life and Kurt's mom. I don't think she's ever very far from his mind. I put a lot of research and time into these chapters (the last one literally took 8 hours). I also think Burt tends to like to use the same vocabulary and words that he's comfortable with. He seems like a very simple writer but his writing is deep – and he likes metaphors (my favorite Burt quote is: "If you took all the water out of the ocean, it wouldn't be wet"). Burt also tends to relate events to other events in the past too. So hopefully, this is coming across.

Also, the end notes don't have specific dates to them. I imagine Burt sending these off to Blaine every couple of weeks/months. As of this chapter, it's end of November/December 2021. (Both Kurt and Blaine are 27 – I'm going by the assumption that currently on the show Blaine and Kurt are both 17).

Finally, I'm hoping to get another chapter out by this weekend. However, that may not happen. If it doesn't, then you probably won't get one until the 26th or later. I'm going to be in Paris and Normandy next week, so this may be on a short hiatus. I'm hoping not. I'm also working on another fic for the lovely winner of the help_japan LJ fund raising auction. As of right now I'm anticipating chapter 23 to be out by Sunday. I've already gotten part of it written. (And who knows, Paris might spark some inspiration for this story!)

I appreciated your feedback on the sketch chapters. I will post them, but probably after the entire story is finished. So thank you all for the outpouring of support and feedback with that!

Also, I just wanted to let you know that every single reader is appreciated! I cannot thank each and every one of you enough! Your response to this story has blown me away and I'm just in awe of you amazing people! I love, LOVE hearing what you all have to say. Sometimes I don't know what else to say but thank you! I truly mean that! You guys' support really motivates me to want to produce the best work I can!

ENJOY GLEE PROM TONIGHT! I know I've been looking forward to it since last week! :)

As always recs/links/alerts/etc are always appreciated!

There are no images.


	24. Chapter 23

It's a Hummel family trait to be stubborn. My dad is like that, his dad was like that and I know I can be like that. So can Kurt. My kid is just like all the dudes in the family. He can be as stubborn as a damn mule. And once he gets something in his head, that's it. When him and Blaine were planning their wedding, he wouldn't even talk to me. He decided that I rejected him and Blaine and that was it. And like I said, it was never about them. It was about me. But you know my kid. He's like that.

It sucked. I hated the idea that he thought I didn't accept him. So yeah, I called him. But every damn time he just pretended to me. Like I didn't know he was lying or something. Then one day, Blaine came to the shop. He hadn't been e-mailing me a lot like he used to – I figured the guy was in that city with Kurt. And he stood there for a second. It reminded me of the first time he came to see me at the shop. All hair gel and confidence telling me to give my kid _the talk_. Then he shocked me by telling me how much he loved Kurt and he'd do anything for my kid. I knew all that. You could just tell by Blaine's e-mails that he loved my son. Really loved him, you know? It took me a long time to see that. But then the kid really dropped a bomb. He told me he wouldn't marry Kurt if it screwed up my relationship with my son. He didn't want to come between us. Blaine fucking offered to walk away from Kurt. Break up with my kid just like that cause he didn't want to screw up my relationship with my son.

And that's when I knew that Blaine wasn't just a good guy. He was going to be my son-in-law. Shit if that wasn't weird. But then like I said, I guess my family is one of them new families so what the hell, right? I took Blaine out to get some chicken wings and a couple a beers. Something I never thought I'd do. If you would've told me I would be taking this guy to grab some food and have a conversation about him marrying my kid – I would've laughed. But now, it was okay. I asked him if he'd take care of my son. Make sure Kurt was fine and happy. And you know what he told me? He told me that they'd take care of each other. That he probably needed Kurt more than Kurt needed him. Hell, if that wasn't good enough for me. The guy loved my son. I mean he really _loved_ my kid.

I never expected that. Yeah, Kurt is my son and an amazing kid. But I know it's hard for dudes like him, you know. Dudes who wear them kind of clothes and act like that way. My kid wasn't the picture of manliness, you know? And Blaine just accepted him the way he was. What more could a father want for his son?

And I remember getting on the phone and talking to Kurt. Now I'm not normally one to talk on the phone for a long time. I don't really get why people want to hold that damn cell phone up to their ear for more than 5 minutes, but hey. To each his own, right?

Anyways, I told him what I wanted for him and why I was nervous about the wedding. And he listened. I guess in that conversation, I let him go. I know that sounds like that new age, hocus pocus stuff. But it was true. He was getting married and I had to just grow a pair and accept that my kid was living his life. Me and his mom had wanted that for him since the day we found out she was pregnant.

So, they planned and got stuff together. Finn and that Noah Puckerman and some dudes who used to go to that Dalton Academy took Blaine out for a bachelor party. They all invited me. But I know I'm not a young guy any more. So they went off. I don't know where the heck they took him. All I know is the morning after it, I found Finn, Noah and Blaine crashed out in my living room. Blaine had some lacey women's underwear around his head and Finn had a man's _thong_ on over his jeans. And somehow that Noah had one tennis shoe on and one stiletto heel. I never asked. It was like how the military was, you know. Don't ask, don't tell.

I was proud of Finn. Guy went from spitting off that word in my basement. That word that I will never allow to be said in my house – even thought Kurt isn't living here. He went from that to taking his gay step brothers soon to be husband out. And it looked like they had a good time. Even if they probably wouldn't remember half the shit they did.

And then the wedding happened. Me and Carole sat next to Blaine's mom. We didn't ask where his father was. I'm not one for gossip, but I heard some of the ex-glee club kids talking that he was in the city. I don't know. I don't know how any parent could miss their kid's wedding.

Anyways, the ceremony was all Kurt. You could just tell. Kurt's always been into details. I mean hell, look what he did with me and Carole's wedding. But this was different. I guess my kid never looked happier. And yeah, they were really freaking young. I just didn't want them to regret anything.

I'll tell you it was hard to watch my kid up there. Watch him commit himself to another person. I mean that was my little boy up there. Carole held my hand. But for a split second I wished it was Kurt's mom. I probably sound like a jackass for saying that. I love Carole. But Kurt's mom was his _mom_.

And when the minister announced them married, it was a real weird feeling. My boy was a married man. My boy had married another boy. And that was it.

Of course he got me to do a father-son dance with him at the reception. But I'll tell you, I had a couple sangria's beforehand. But when I held my son in my arms, I told him I was proud of him and that I loved him. I don't think I told him that enough, you know? As a dad, it was hard to see him grown up. I remember waking up at 1 in the morning and changing his diaper, or feeding him. But now he had a ring on his finger and a husband. I had a son-in-law. And that was just how things were.

You know how they say when your kid gets married, you don't lose that kid, but you gain one? Well that's a bunch of bull. But at least you know that your kid is loved, right. So yeah, I guess that's okay.

****(****)****(****)****

From: Burt Hummel  
Subject: Here  
To: Blaine Anderson  
Attachment: ()

Blaine –

Here is the next one. Hope you guys have a good flight over.

Burt

****(****)****(****)****

From: Blaine Anderson  
Subjec: Re: Here  
To: Burt Hummel

Hey Burt,

The flight was alright. It was slightly turbulent, but it was okay. We're waiting in baggage claim right now and then we're going to get our rental car. So, we should be at your house within the next few hours.

I downloaded your chapter and read it on the ride over. You're right, the wedding was completely Kurt. He put a lot of time and effort into planning. I think we were up to six wedding planning binders by the time we actually got married. I would have been happy to go down to city hall, but I'm really glad we had the wedding.

Well, I think I spot our luggage (you know Kurt can't go anywhere without at least three suitcases). So I should go. We'll see you in a bit.

Take Care,  
Blaine

****(****)****(****)****

A/N: So sorry for the hiatus. I was in Paris for the past week! Anyways, I hope you enjoyed this chapter. It was difficult to write (which I didn't expect.)


	25. Chapter 24

I always expected to get that call. You know the one that comes late at night from a police station or hospital. I mean, when both Finn and Kurt were living at the house, it seemed kind of inevitable. Luckily that never happened. Me and Carole had some good kids. Yeah they could be pains in the asses at times. But yeah, they were good kids.

And when they both left the house, they were adults. They had lives and responsibilities. So I thought I was passed that. Everyone was moving on with their lives, you know.

Then they graduated from college. Finn even got into the top 25% of his class. And Kurt and Blaine got married.

I guess, I just was stupid in thinking that the boys were okay now. Yeah, I still worried about them. I mean, who wouldn't still worry about their kids? But I figured hell, they were married and adults. Why the hell would Kurt need me anymore?

Then I got _that_ phone call. The one that freaking stopped me and made me think I almost had a second heart attack. I'll never forget it. Carole and me were about to go to bed. We had watched "The Late Show," when the phone rang. It was the Manhattan General Hospital. The woman told me that Kurt had been brought in and they'd tried to get a hold of Blaine, but couldn't. My kid was in the hospital. My kid was laying in a hospital bed in a fucking city far away from me. And I don't fucking care if he was 22 or 2, he was still my son. He'd always be my kid.

When you get that kind of call, you don't hesitate. I guess you just do. Carole and me didn't even stop to think. She threw some clothes into a bag and booked our plane tickets on the internet. And we spent the night in the freaking airport. I just couldn't sit at home, you know. Just couldn't make myself sleep when my kid was in some hospital somewhere in _that_ city. And where the heck had Blaine been? I trusted my kid with him. That guy was my kid's husband. He was supposed to protect Kurt from crap like that.

By the time I got Blaine on the phone, Carole and me were in a taxi in that city. The guy had been away on business. Something to do with his law school associate job thing. And he didn't know what the hell was going on.

I didn't know what to expect. I was about to march my ass down to that hospital and demand information on my boy. But then Finn called me. Said they were at Kurt's apartment. And I was terrified. This is my kid. And I just wanted to hug him and make sure he was okay. But you know, I was also chicken shit scared to see him. I never wanted to see my kid like that. But I had to suck it up. This was Kurt. And I needed to just be his dad.

Carole held my hand the entire ride there. Yeah, she cared about and loved Kurt. But Kurt was _my _son. He was part of me. All I could see was him when he was born. This little thing that looked like an alien staring up at me. This life that I would be responsible for the rest of my life. How the hell was I supposed to walk into that fucking apartment? My kid was attacked. And no one was there to help him. Not his husband, not his step-brother and not me. It wasn't right.

But somehow I reminded myself that I had a pair between my legs and I needed to be a man now. I walked into that apartment with Carole not knowing what the heck to expect. And then there he was. Sound asleep, curled up on the couch. Finn was sitting next to him. They had that movie, _Moulin Rouge_ on mute. _Willy Wonka_ was on the table. And really the only reason I know those movies is cause Kurt watched them so much.

It was then that I got a good look at him. Bruised cheek, quite a shiner on his eye, puffed out lip and arm in a cast. I figured there was more damage, I just couldn't see it. Kid looked rough, but he was alive and breathing. You know, that's what mattered. My kid was sitting there sleeping.

I know my kid is strong. I do. But just cause he's strong doesn't mean that I don't worry. Cause I do. Every day of his life I've worried about him. Parent's jobs are to worry the day their kid is born. And when you have a kid like Kurt, it's even more. You know? Did you know, I used to have parents not allow their kid to be friends with my kid? Yeah, they never said it to my face. Too shit scared too. One day Kurt'd have a little friend at school and the next they weren't allowed to play together. Yeah, I knew. Kurt was into girls stuff. He liked them girl toys and wasn't into the GI Joes or boy shit I bought him.

All I've ever wanted for him was to be safe. And that's not much to ask for. My kid deserved to be safe. And I thought he was. You know, he lived in that city for a few years. But some punk ass assholes decided to target him. I mean I didn't have an idea how to deal with it. Some guys who didn't know my kid cornered him and mugged him and left him there.

I don't care how old he gets. Kurt'll always be my little boy. I picked him up like I did when he was five and fell asleep on the couch to take him to bed. I don't know if he realized what he was doing, but he wrapped his arms around my neck. I remember thinking that I loved him. You know.

I sat in Blaine and his bedroom, just watching my boy sleep. I held his hand. Something I hadn't done since he was 8. He had a small fever. I remember just thinking that I'd have to go get him some water and meds later.

And then he woke up and called me _daddy_ – which he rarely ever did even as a little kid. I guess I needed to hear that. Just to know my kid still needed his old man in some way.

That's the problem when your kids get older. They stop relying on you for stuff. And having a child like Kurt is hard. He had a hard life, you know. Between his mom and all that bullying shit and being gay. And the worst fucking thing was, I couldn't do a damn thing to stop it. Yeah, I went down to McKinley and threatened all them administrators and I accepted him. But stuff like this – I couldn't stop. And that just really really fucking sucked. I guess it's just accepting that sometimes I couldn't protect him from all the bad shit in the world.

****(****)****(****)****

Blaine -

Here is the next part. Hope you and Kurt had a good time here.

Carole wanted me to thank you guys again for the diamond earrings you gave her. And you didn't need to get me those Buckeyes season tickets.

And this paper wasn't my idea. Carole had it made - thought it'd be festive or whaterver.

Burt

****(****)****(****)****

From: Blaine Anderson  
Subject: Thanks  
To: Burt Hummel

Hi Burt,

I had a great time being back in Lima. It was so great to be away from the hustle of NYC and relax. I didn't have to worry about clients or court dates.

Kurt and I also got to see Wesley, David and Jeff from the Dalton Warblers for a few hours before our flight home. It's always nice to reconnect with old friends. I think Kurt and I are going to try and fly out to Los Angeles to see Mercedes New Years Eve show. She's trying to get all the former McKinley New Directions members to fly out. Kurt said he spoke with Finn and Finn's going to come out to the apartment and then we'll just all fly out together.

Anyways, this chapter was hard to read. It was probably one of the worst times of my life. I know muggings are pretty much a common staple of living in the city, but I never thought it'd happen to us, which is probably really naïve of me. I know I drove Kurt nuts for a little while afterwards. I just had to be near him and know that he was really okay. It kills me that they never found the guys who did that to him. I admit, when I get home before Kurt, sometimes I can't relax until he walks in the door.

I think I probably should go now. Tell Carole no need to thank us – you as well.

Take care,

Blaine

****(****)****(****)****

Resources on bullying:

It Gets Better Campaign

GLAAD resources on bullying

A/N: Thank you so so so so so much for all your reviews! I'd love to hear from all of you (even if you drop a line/comment and say hi). I want to personally thank everyone for reviewing! It really means a lot to come on and see these comments. :) Also, thank you to everyone who's rec'd my story. You guys are all so awesome!

(Please don't archive without permission. I like to know where my story ends up and have some control over it) :)

Recs/Links/Alerts/Etc. are always appreciated!

IMAGES: anisalee(.)livejournal(.)com(/)21499(.)html


	26. Chapter 25

I've tried to be a good dad to my kid. I'm not some idiot who thinks that I've always done right by Kurt. I've screwed up. And I'll be the first one to admit it. I ain't so proud not too. Raising a kid is hard, you know. Not just cause they're gay either. Even if Kurt were straight, I'd still say it's tough. You're stuck with this life for the rest of yours and most times you have no freaking idea what the hell you're doing. They don't make a manual for parenting. It's not like a car when you have an idea of what parts go where and in what order you put 'em in. You're on your own. And that's shit scary.

A few weeks ago I was screwing around in the attic looking for a box for Carole. There was a box labeled "Crowns." I knew right away what it was – Kurt's tiara collection. I remember the day I packed them all up and stuffed them up there. All cause I wasn't man enough to handle it. But, I mean, what dad could. I found girls crowns down in his room. He hid them under his bed like guys do with porn. In fact, at the time I think porn would have been better than those things.

You know, I lived a lot of my life just accepting my kid. Yeah, I loved him. And I accepted him. But it took a long damn time for me to actually be okay with it. I think it bothers Kurt that I can kind of understand parents who have problems with their kids being gay. I'm not talking about those people who kick their kids out or cut them off – there's never an excuse to do that to your kid unless they're a cold blooded murderer or something. It's not easy to just get, you know. I know I had dreams for Kurt. And none of them involved him being married to a dude. I wanted to take him to ball games and watch him play on a football pee-wee league. Instead I had tea parties, roller skating, bike rides and Disney musicals. Never in a million years did I think that me, Burt Hummel, would do any of that. Was it ideal for me? Not at the time. But you know what? I understood that was my kid. He liked frou frou stuff.

And like I've said, just cause Kurt was flamboyant, didn't make him less than man. He was comfortable with himself. That's something that takes people years to do. Yet, my son was just himself. Whether or not those punks had a problem with him or not, he wasn't going to change. It took me over 30 years to be really okay with myself. Maybe he taught me that. I don't know. I just know that having kids changes you and what you're meant to be, you know.

Sometimes I do wonder what life would have been like if Kurt's mom hadn't died. She loved him more than anything. Kurt was her baby. I remember when we were dating, she'd tell me that she wanted kids. Just seeing her and him together was enough for me to feel like maybe I'd done some good in life. I don't know if he even remembers her that much. It's bad enough losing a family member, but his mom – it killed me. Now that he's all grown up, I mean I wonder if he remembers her voice or smell or the way she'd hold him in her arms like he was going to disappear. But you can't change the past, you know. You just roll with whatever the hell happens to you.

Kurt never really did see his mom's side of the family after her death either. I think he may be Book Face Space friends with some cousins on that side. I don't know. All I know is that every year he gets a check from his grandmother for Christmas. I guess it's a peace offering or something. I don't know. But what I do know is $100 a year ain't enough to cover the cost of a family. I just let it go though. Kurt uses the money for whatever he needs and she gets to feel like she's in his life without having to see him.

But the kid's got his own family now. Him and Blaine have a nice life for themselves. They live in a nice apartment in the city. Kurt said it's a good price for what they have. I'm real proud of them. Who'd have thought that two kids who met in high school would still be together? I mean I didn't think they'd make it. But then Carole and me thought Finn and Rachel would end up hitched. That didn't happen. Finn married some nice girl he met in college and they had 3 kids. Finn really got himself together.

Anyways, I guess what I've learned from this parenting thing is that it's really fucking tough. And I don't have the answers. One of the new dudes at the tire shop told me the other day he thought his kid may be gay. He wanted answers in how to accept his kid. I didn't know what to tell him. You can't just tell a person to accept something. I might have learned a lot raising Kurt, but I couldn't just make it okay for him by pulling some magic string or something out of my ass. You just do the best you can. And sometimes your best is never going to be good enough. And sometimes you're going to fall flat on your ass and act like a shit. It's part of it. Hell, I'm still learning how to be a dad and my kid's grown.

There are times when I look back on my life and say "Burt Hummel you've done good." I got a nice house, a tire shop, a wife and two sons. Then I look at Kurt and see him doing good. And you know what? I raised this kid who's done great things in life and that's not because of any parenting I did. That's because he's smart and strong and meant to do what he's doing. And no matter the shit he went through with bullies, he turned out the best man I know.

So I guess Burt Hummel's advice on raising a kid is it's really freaking hard and you're not going to get everything right. It's just the way it is. But you love your kid no matter what. And I think that's what makes it okay. That's how I survived. I just loved Kurt. Plain and simple.

He's my son.

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A/N: You guys are just absolutely amazing and fabulous with your wonderful comments and reviews! I'm continually overwhelmed and humbled by you guys! You are so freaking awesome! I've read every comment ever posted for this story and I'm so blown away! You guys rock so hard core! :)

As always recs/links/reviews/etc. are always appreciated!


	27. Chapter 26

**A Preface by Blaine Anderson**

It was about three years ago when Burt and I had the conversation that sparked this whole project. It was early evening on the 4th of July. Burt and I had cracked open a couple of beers and were enjoying the summer evening. I don't even know how it happened, but we got to talking about kids and raising kids. I'd known Burt for quite a while beforehand, and he'd always had this really amazing relationship with Kurt – his gay son. I knew from experience that there are fathers out there who just don't have that sort of bond that Burt has with his son. Honestly, I thought Burt's story was so inspiring that maybe it could help other men.

The road that Burt took on to write this hasn't always been easy. I was able to be part of his process and it was difficult. Asking someone to write down their personal thoughts, feelings, and journey isn't something to be taken lightly. I'm a lawyer and it's my job to keep people's confidences and help them through a hard time in their life. However, in asking Burt to write this, I did the exact opposite. I wanted him to tell everything that he could. I suppose you could say some of it was selfish reasons. I wanted to see how Kurt was raised and know more about how they got to have the relationship they do now. Yet, I knew that what he managed to accomplish was very important – not only to the GLBT community, but to the parenting community as well.

At this point, you're probably wondering who I am and what I have to do with any of this. Well, Kurt is my husband. We've been married for the past six years and we've been together for almost ten years. Sometimes it feels like we've been with each other for only days and others feel like I've known Kurt my entire life. I'll admit that I never thought I'd ever fall in love with someone as much as I fell for him. He's my best friend and the only person I've ever felt 100% truly comfortable to be myself around.

When I met Burt for the first time, I was nervous. Kurt and I weren't even dating at the time. Yet, I knew of his relationship with his father and how important it was to him. Kurt talked about his dad all the time. He'd mention him in passing conversation, when we were shopping or at the Lima Bean. I don't even know if he realized it, but he'd just casually say "my dad would like this," or "yesterday my dad and I." Something like that. Their relationship was unlike anything I'd ever seen before, even with my straight guy friends.

From what I could tell, Burt was the kind of father who respected his son for whom he was and accepted him without question. I'd come to find out that was not always the case with those two and it took years for them to have that sort of bond. However, the point is they had that relationship and have it now.

In my own life, I didn't have that relationship with my father. I grew up in a different world than Kurt, though. My life was very privileged. My parents had money, we grew up in a large house, I spent summers in wealthy and celebrity frequented areas, and I attended great schools. That's not to say that those schools were great socially – but they were academically great.

I met Kurt at The Dalton Academy for Boys when we were just teenagers. My time at Dalton began when I transferred from The Philips Groton Lawrenceville School. Philips was (and still is) one of the best prep schools in the Midwest. My father was an alumnus, as was his father and so on. It was built in 1886 and was originally an all male school. It's rumored that one of Abraham Lincoln's grandson's attended this school under a different name. However, that has never been confirmed or denied by the school. I think the mystery of it is one of the reasons why Philips is so prestigious. However, bullying had plagued me at that school. During my time at Philips, we had a Sadie Hawkin's dance and I asked my male friend to go with me. I had just come out and I naïvely thought that kids wouldn't care. Boy was I wrong. My friend and I were beaten up after the dance – he ended up with a broken arm and I spent three days in the hospital. That was that. Within two months I was a student at Dalton.

When Kurt came into my life, it was unexpected. He walked into my world and I knew that I wanted to be connected to him in some way; even if it was just as friends. The closer we got, the more I knew I never wanted to say goodbye to him.

So, what does this have to do with Burt?

Well, a lot actually. I was a bold, naïve, and somewhat arrogant teenager. Blame it on my upbringing or my social status, I supposed. Anyways, when Kurt told me that he didn't really know anything about gay sex nor did he want to talk about it, I decided to take it upon myself to do something about it. I went to Burt's tire shop and told him to talk to Kurt about sex.

What seventeen year old kid thinks that's a good idea?

Apparently I did.

Somehow, within a ten minute conversation with my new best friend's father, I let my guard down just enough to tell Burt about my own father; not much, but enough.

From then on, I envied Kurt. His father was a man who tried his hardest to be what Kurt needed. This was a man who I came to respect in my life.

As time went on, Burt became really important to me. I may not have been his favorite person, but he tolerated me. Even when Kurt and I started dating, he didn't change the way he treated me. I know it was probably difficult for him to have his son enter into a gay relationship with another boy, but he never said anything negative to me. He and his second wife, Carole, even invited me to dinner during family nights.

Burt was there for me when Kurt broke up with me for a short time during our first year of college. He had continued to be there for me when Kurt and I got back together and then eventually got married. He's pretty much become this permanent fixture in my life. I know if I ever need anything, Burt Hummel will be there on the other end of the phone, e-mail, letter or text message.

It's no secret that I look up to Burt. If or when Kurt and I have children, I want to have the relationship with my kids that he does with Kurt. Burt didn't let the idea that his son likes boys cloud his feelings. Some parents disown their children or try to change them when they find out their child is gay. I've seen several cases and volunteered with different organization that deal with GLBT youth who don't have the support system that Kurt had with his father – and it's always heart breaking. Kids literally have no one to turn to and the people who are supposed to love them unconditionally (their parents) have abandoned them because of fear or religion or lack of understanding.

The reason why I wanted Burt to write this book was not to just tell a story, but to give others hope and help make a difference in the world. I know that Burt was reluctant at first. He told me he had no idea what he would say and who would care. Well, I do. He was a man who used to say the word _fag_ without thinking of the consequences. He was the stereotypical "guy" who watched football, worked on cars and got his hands dirty. He's an average American _dude_. If a guy like Burt Hummel can sit and have fun with his son playing games like tea party, dolls and other types of non-conventional boy games without batting an eyelash – well than that's a real man. I hope that men and all parents can benefit from his story.

In closing, thank you Burt. You have become a good friend and I'm honored to be your son-in-law. I know I don't really say this, but I do love you and being part of your family. To all you readers, my wish is that you can take something away from this book. At the very core, we're all the same. We all want to be loved, respected, tolerated and happy. We all deserve that in life. Burt once told me that "love is love, kid," when I asked him if he ever had a problem with my relationship with his son. If anything, I hope you can take away that message. The message that love is love.

_Blaine Anderson_

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A/N: There are four more chapters left in this story. :) However, there are other things in the works that revolve around this 'verse.

Thanks for all your support!

As always, recs/links/reviews/ etc. are always appreciated! _  
_


	28. Chapter 27

From: Blaine Anderson  
Subject: I love you  
To: Kurt Hummel-Anderson

Hey Kurt,

I know you were going to start reading your dad's manuscript today and I just wanted to see how you were doing.

I'm going to be home from work a little later than usual. I'll pick up a pizza and beer (don't roll your eyes). Call me if you need anything.

Love you!

_Sent from my BlackBerry_

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From: Kurt Hummel-Anderson  
Subject: Re: I love you  
To: Blaine Anderson

I got halfway through and had to stop for a while. I worked on some sketches for a little while.

Love you too.

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From: Kurt Hummel-Anderson  
Subject: Manuscript  
To: Dad

Hi dad,

I don't even know where to begin, but I will say this. How the heck do you not tell me that you had spent the night in the hospital because of your heart? You talk about me keeping secrets, but this is a pretty big one. I cannot believe you'd keep that from me. What if something happened? Next time, you need to call me or have Carole call me. I don't care what time it is or what I'm doing. You call me.

Okay, moving on. It took me a while to work up the nerve to read the manuscript because I had no idea how I'd react. I suppose I just didn't want to see what you went through with me because I know it was painful for you. Blaine and I had a lot of conversations about what I should expect from reading it and how it might affect me. He even offered to sit with me while I read, but it was something I needed to do on my own.

Reading about mom wasn't easy. It's hard for me to even think about her. When those telemarketers would call and think I was her – that was the worse. I know you think I don't want to talk about her, but I do talk about her. Blaine and I have had conversations about her a few times and just because I don't talk about her, doesn't mean I don't think about her. I miss her, dad. I think reading about her death was probably the most difficult thing about your book. I don't remember a lot about that day, but I do remember that you just held onto me. Maybe that's when I stopped believing in God. I don't know when that happened. I just know that I'm okay with religion now. I still don't think I could ever believe in God, but I'm okay with it.

Blaine does believe in God and he thinks everything happens for a reason. Like when he and I met at Dalton, he thinks that was meant to be. I suppose it's possible. I call it coincidence, he calls it fate. Well, for whatever reason, we ended up together.

You said you didn't think you'd always done the right thing with me, but I know you did the best you could. I've seen kids come into the Brummel House who were kicked out of their home by their dads for being gay. If they weren't kicked out, their father's made it known that they didn't support them. It scares me how differently my life could have been. I know I wasn't always the easiest kid growing up, but you never treated me any differently. As much as I accused you of doing that, now that I'm older – I know that you didn't or wouldn't.

Dad, I know it was probably terrifying to have to raise me on your own. Yet, you never let it show. I never knew about the money problems you had, or anything else that went on with you. I grew up in a good home that was full of love and support. Even if you couldn't always afford to get me something, you made my happiness your priority.

I just can't believe you wrote this. Blaine told me it was intense and could become really important to a lot of people. I didn't quite believe him, but reading this meant a lot to me. I had to stop a few times. I knew that me being bullied was hard on you but I didn't realize how much so. I'm sorry for putting you through everything I did. I know you're going to say it's not my fault, but just accept it.

I'm proud to be your son and I'm proud of the life you gave me. Thank you. I love you dad.

Kurt

(I know I probably made you kind of uneasy with this, so I'll tell Blaine to go set up the gaming system to the internet so you and he can play some sort of blow crap up game!)

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A/N: Thank you so much for all your amazing comments! I can't believe this story is wrapping up! :( However, there may be some things in the works coming up… (I'm taking a page out of trollin' Chris' book)

As always recs/links/comments/alerts/etc. are always appreciated.


	29. Chapter 28

**About the Author**

Burt Hummel was born in Lima, Ohio and has lived there his entire life. His mother was a nurse at a local hospital in Lima and his father worked on an automobile assembly line. He grew up in a suburban household with his older brother, Andrew. Throughout his adolescence, he attended Lima public schools and briefly attended Allen County Community College. He married his first wife in 1993 and they had a son in 1994 named Kurt.

In 2002, tragedy struck the Hummel household, when Burt's wife was struck by a drunk driver leaving him a widower. He was forced into a life of a single father and raised Kurt on his own until he married Carole Hudson in 2010. He inherited a step-son, Finn, through the marriage.

Burt and Carole stayed in Lima where they raised their son's together. Burt and Carole continue to live in Lima.

Burt would like to thank his parents and brother for their continued support.

He would like to thank his step-son Finn for showing him that tolerance and acceptance is possible.

For loving and supporting him, Burt would like to thank his wife, Carole.

Additionally, he would like to thank his son-in-law Blaine, for helping him and supporting him throughout this entire process and for loving his son.

To his son Kurt, he would like to thank for being the best man he's ever known and the best thing he's ever accomplished. He's incredibly proud and humbled to call you his son.

Finally, to his late wife and Kurt's mom – he would like to thank her for giving him the greatest gift he could ever want.

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A/N: IMAGES – anisalee(.)livejournal(.)com(/)22461(.)html

Thank you so much for all your comments! I appreciate every single one!

As always recs/links/alerts/etc. are always appreciated!


	30. Chapter 29

Blaine,

I received a copy of _No Matter What: A Memoir and Guide to Raising a Teenage Son – who just happens to be gay_ by Burt Hummel in the mail last week. Your…Kurt, saw fit that I read this. Honestly, I was going to just throw it out, but your mother insisted that I at least keep it. I wasn't going to read it, but again, your mother insisted I at least start it.

The first and the last part I read was your preface. Your words and thoughts about Mr. Hummel really struck me. I've always tried to do what I thought was right for you, Blaine. I wanted you to have every opportunity available to you and to never sell yourself short of your potential. You're an Anderson and that name represents us and all that we have accomplished. Your great- great grandfather worked very hard to give his family the life we have now. I've always wanted you to appreciate that.

When you came out to your mother and I, I know that I did not handle it well. You have to understand that I had plans for you. It was always my dream for you to follow in my footsteps – just like I followed in my father's footsteps. I gave you every opportunity I could – we choose the best schools with the best instructors, gave you summers in exotic places, a network of friends who had parents in positions of power. I wanted you to live a very privileged life. You're my son and you deserved the best. When you said you were homosexual, it felt like you were purposely trying to ruin your life. I know now that wasn't the case. You were being honest with us.

Son, what you have to understand about me is I've never been exposed to that. I didn't know any boys who were like that growing up, and if they were they didn't tell me. I never thought I'd have a son who was. I always believed you'd find the right girl and that would be the end of the phase you were going through.

I admit that I haven't always treated you fairly or been a great father to you. For a long time I didn't know how to love you or be around you. So, yes, I did pretend that you weren't homosexual. I didn't want you to be and a part of me still has a hard time thinking about it. Your sexuality has been a source of almost all of our fights and I know I'm at fault for a lot of it. I didn't want to hear about Kurt and your relationship. It's horrible for me to admit this, but when you first introduced Kurt to your mother and I, my first thought was that he was incredibly "girly" and if that's what you wanted, why couldn't you just date a girl. I still don't understand your…life, but I'm going to try.

One thing I took away from reading this book was the fact that you have a better relationship with Mr. Hummel than you do with me. That really took me a back and I have to tell you Blaine, it hurts to read that. It's not your fault, but I've always wanted that relationship with you. I'm your father and I wanted to have that close father-son relationship with you. Why do you think I wanted us to rebuild that car together? I wanted us to have something to bond over. You've made it very clear you thought that was a way for me to try and make you straight and you're not entirely incorrect. I thought if you did something like that, then it might help you to become more of a man. However, I also wanted to have something in common with you. Up until then (and even now) the only thing we ever really had in common was football. Even when you were a boy, you hardly ever came to me with your problems. At the time I thought it was because you were being a man. I realized you probably were afraid to come to me.

Blaine, I may not have been the best father to you. However, I am still your father. I don't care if you are a grown man, you are still my son. You are still an Anderson and a member of this family. You will not disrespect the Anderson name in any manner – because you haven't. I have. I haven't been what you needed. As much as I tried, I just could not accept you or your choices. I was disappointed in you. I want to say that I am sorry. Regardless of all my other feelings, I do love you.

Reading Mr. Hummel's book has made me realize some things. I don't want our relationship to be relegated to arguments on holidays and a few phone calls a year. I want to be able to speak to my son again and have him speak to me.

The other day, your mother pulled out your wedding DVD. I'm working myself up to be able to watch it, but it is on top of my desk in my office. Blaine, I'm not going to change overnight. It's taken me this long to come to the conclusion and accept that you are a homosexual. As much as I wish that I could embrace Kurt with open arms like his father has done with you, it's going to take me time. I'll get to that point one day, but I just can't right now. I want you to know that I'm going to work on myself to be able to have that relationship with you that Mr. Hummel does.

I spent a lot of time resenting your lifestyle choice, but I at least understand that it's really not a choice nor a lifestyle. I have even come to accept that you love Kurt. I hope that one day in the near future your mother, myself, you and Kurt can all sit down to a meal together like you do with the Hummel's.

Blaine, I do love you. You're my son and even without a lot of support from me, you've managed to accomplish a great deal of success. You give hope that the Anderson name will live on and represent a greater legacy than it already does. I love you, son.

- Dad

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A/N: Thank you so much! So sorry for the delay. I went to Glee Live on Monday and got to meet Darren (and Heather) and get a Darren!hug (at the VIP event). I even spoke to him for a few minutes. He's such a sweetie!

Then I got to sit in the 2nd row of the pit, 4 seats over from the stairs where the cast exited and entered from. I literally was 5 ft. away from Chris at one point! So good! :)

I also want to thank you all for all the amazing comments. I'm always so shocked when someone tells me they came to this story because of a rec from the K/B rec post. I'm blown away that you guys would think this worthy of rec'ing and sharing. It means so much to me! You guys don't know how much I apprecaite it! Seriously, I can't even express how much I appreciate all your wonderful, amazing comments!

Oh and did anyone else see Mike O'Mally on Kimmel last night? OMG, be still my Burt/Mike loving heart. That man is just plain awesome sauce!

Link to see it in the font/format it's supposed to be in: anisalee(.)livejournal(.)com(/)23007(.)html

I should also mention there are 2 more chapters left in this story! :)


	31. Chapter 30

From: Kyle Shepherd  
Subject: To Mr.'s Burt Hummel, Kurt Hummel and Blaine Anderson  
To: Mr. Burt Hummel , Mr. Blaine Anderson , Mr. Kurt Hummel-Anderson

Hello,

My name is Kyle Shepherd and I'm 16 years old. I'm sorry if this is weird, but I got your e-mail addresses off of the internet.

I just wanted to say that I read _N__o Matter What: A Memoir and Guide to Raising a Teenage Son – who just happens to be gay_ and I just wanted to thank you. This book meant so much to me. Probably more than you'll ever know. Reading about you guys' family and that it was okay to be gay…I don't even know what to say.

I came out to my parents last year and they haven't really talked to me since. I was raised in a very strict religious family. Being gay wasn't something they wanted to deal with. It sucks. I just want to be able to tell my mom that I think a boy's cute or sit with my dad without him thinking about me being gay. It's like I have this big sign that says GAY over my head. I can relate to Mr. Anderson so much because my dad isn't at all supportive of me being gay. He even asked if I'd consider going to one of those camps that make you straight. He tells me he loves me, but just hates that part of me. That really sucks.

I just want you to know that this book has given me so much. I've read it 3 times already. I used to pray that I would wake up straight. I didn't want to be gay at all, but now I think I'm okay with it. Knowing that there are people out there who don't give a crap if someone is gay is just so awesome.

It gives me hope that maybe one day I can find a boyfriend and get married because Mr. Anderson and Mr. Hummel-Anderson did. The two of you knew you loved each other and were able to have a great relationship. Some TV shows try to show good gay couples, but there's not a lot. Just reading about you two makes me think that it's okay and that it's possible to have a nice, monogamous and loving relationship.

So, I just wanted to say thanks for you know, being yourselves. I really think that I'm probably the only kid in my high school who will admit that I'm gay. I'm pretty sure there are others, but even now they're scared to come out. Sometimes it does suck that everyone knows, but know that Mr. Hummel-Anderson made it through gets me through.

I hope you don't think I'm too weird or creepy or whatever. I've never really done this sort of thing before.

-Kyle

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From: Blaine Anderson  
Subject: Re: To Mr.'s Burt Hummel, Kurt Hummel and Blaine Anderson  
To: Kyle Shepherd

Hi Kyle,

First of all, please call me Blaine. I still feel too young to be called Mr. Anderson!

Second, I'm glad you wrote to me. I understand that it was probably difficult to write to a complete stranger about what's going on in your life. One thing that I think is important is to be able to rely on people and build up a support system for yourself. That's something I had to do. I found and surrounded myself with people who cared about me and didn't care about the fact that I was gay. I know it seems really hard – easier said than done. You said you're scared to come out to your friends and I understand that. It is terrifying to expose a very personal side of you to people who might not be accepting. Trust me, I've been there. It's something that you have to be ready to do.

I also can empathize with your relationship with your family. It's difficult. Just know that you're not alone. I've been right where you're at and I can relate to how you're feeling. I just want you to know that it may not seem like it now, but it does get better.

You talked about my relationship with Kurt and how one day you hoped that you could find a boyfriend. I know exactly where you're coming from. Growing up, I didn't have any gay couples I could really look up to. I never thought I'd find someone like Kurt – especially in high school. I used to tell him that it was fate that brought us together. Call me a hopeless romantic (even though I'm terrible at romance!), but I think there is someone out there for everyone.

Anyways, please feel free to e-mail me at if you need to just talk to someone.

Take care,

Blaine

**CONFIDENTIALITY NOTICE:**  
The contents of this e-mail may contain information that is confidential or privileged. If you are not the intended recipient, please be aware that any disclosure, copying, distribution or use of the contents of this information is prohibited and may lead to legal action. If you have received this message in error, please notify my administrative assistant immediately at: , subject line: MESSAGE RECIPIENT ERROR.

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From: Burt Hummel  
Subject: Re: To Mr.'s Burt Hummel, Kurt Hummel and Blaine Anderson  
To: Kyle Shepherd

Kyle,

Thanks for e-mailing me. I'm glad you got something out of the book. And I'm glad it helped you in some way.

Sometimes parents just need time, you know. I know it sucks right now. But you just got to keep going. I used to tell Kurt that it wasn't his job to change himself. His job was to be who he was and I'm telling you the same thing, kid. You live your life and you know, you might just teach others that it's okay. We're all teachers I guess. And you live your life and you teach others through living. Or at least that's what I think.

You write to me any time you want to, kid. I don't know how much help I can be. But like I've told Blaine, I can open an e-mail and read. So that's one thing right there, right?

Burt

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From: Kurt Hummel  
Subject: Re: Fwd: To Mr.'s Burt Hummel, Kurt Hummel and Blaine Anderson  
To: Kyle Shepherd

Hi Kyle,

I just wanted to thank you for reaching out and contacting myself, Blaine and my father. It takes real courage to admit what you did to us. I say courage because it's a word that helped me get through high school. Blaine used to text and e-mail me just that simple seven letter word throughout the day. It helped me, so maybe it can help you in some small way.

Kyle, I may not be able to relate to every single thing you're going through. I've always said I'm luck when it comes to my dad. However, I do know what it's like to be bullied, ostracized and hated simply because I like boys. You're right, it does suck, but it gets better. I promise you that it does. I never thought I'd meet someone like Blaine, but then one day there he was.

Sometimes being patient is the only action we can take. I know it seems unfair, but you have to be patient and believe that things won't always be like they are now. You are not alone, Kyle. Remember that.

Please do not hesitate to e-mail me. You can also call the Brummel House (toll free) 24 hours a day and if they need to, they can connect you directly to the police, medical help, or even me. So don't be afraid to use that phone number or my e-mail address.

Kurt

_**You**__** are **__**not **__**alone**_

Kurt Hummel | The Brummel House | |

The contents of this message are solely intended for the recipient. If you are not the recipient then please disregard the message and forward it to . If are not the recipient and attempt to reproduce or re-distribute this message contents, please be advised that this may be grounds for legal action to be taken. For further information regarding legality, you may contact (Blaine Anderson, esquire). The Brummel House is a 501 (c3) non-profit organization and operates under the legal judiciary of New York State.

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A/N: As always, thank you so much! I cannot say how much you guys' feedback means to me. Seriously, I'm blown away. You guys are awesome! Seriously awesome! I can't believe we're one chapter away from the ending!

As always, recs/links/alerts/etc. are always appreciated! You guys rec'ing this fic just blows me away. I cannot say how many messages I've gotten that say they read my story because of rec's. Thank you!

To see the correct formatting: anisalee(.)livejournal(.)com(/)23266(.)html


	32. Epilogue

I don't really know how to start this, or really even who to write this to. Kurt suggested I do this. He thought it might help me. He claims I don't share my emotions as much as I should. I guess it's kind of true. I always try to be calm and collected. I like to think I'm getting better at it though. I don't know. Maybe this is a horrible idea.

Well, writing helped Burt to express himself more and he and Kurt are even closer now than they were. I feel silly typing this on this iPad 5 that Kurt bought me, while he, Burt and Carole are up on deck lying in the sun. We're on a cruise, by the way. Kurt and I bought Carole and Burt's tickets to come with us. Kurt and I are celebrating seven years of marriage and Carole and Burt are celebrating eleven years together.

It's been one heck of a year. I made partner at one of the biggest firms in the state, helped Burt when he was writing his book, helped find a publisher, Kurt opened The Brummel House and is working on a ready to wear clothing line. Sometimes I look back and really have to pinch myself. I can't believe everything that's happened to us. If you would have told me fifteen years ago that I would be married to the man of my dreams, living in an amazing apartment in New York City with a job as a partner at a law firm, I would've laughed. I never really thought I'd ever love someone like I love Kurt. He's everything I've ever really wanted in a partner. I told him in our wedding vows that I admired him for his courageous, tenacity, his passion and his heart.

Don't get me wrong, things with Kurt haven't always been easy. As hard as we fought for our relationship, we fought in the relationship with each other equally. There were days when I wasn't sure we'd make it. When we got married, I guess we both thought things would just "magically" work out. They didn't. We didn't have much time together – that was probably one of our major problems. I started law school almost immediately after the wedding and he was busy with an internship. I think we saw each other for a few hours a day. I feel silly telling this to an iPad, but we were barely having sex during that time. We were just exhausted and usually one of us would be in the mood when the other wasn't. It was really rough and sex for both of us was always about something more than the physical. We used sex as a way to express ourselves and our feelings for one another.

I remember the first time we ever had sex. We had talked a lot about it before. I wanted it to be special for Kurt – and for myself. Losing your virginity is a huge deal. We didn't really discuss how we'd do it, but what we wanted it to do for our relationship. So, during a half day of school, we went back to Kurt's house and his bedroom. I didn't want Kurt to know, but I was incredibly nervous. It took a few minutes, but after the first kiss, everything else seemed to just happen. Before I knew it, I was preparing him and then I was inside of him. I don't remember a whole lot from that first time. I know that people say they can remember every detail, every touch, but the one thing I remember so vividly was knowing that I would always be so in love with him.

Sometimes, it was that memory that kept me from giving up. When I was sleeping on the sofa, trying to figure out what was going to keep our marriage together, I'd think of that moment and how we held each other afterwards. Often times, I think we expected to wake up the next morning and have everything back to normal, but it didn't work that way. Sometimes the aftermath of an argument – all the pain and hurt – doesn't go away with a night's sleep.

We didn't tell anyone about the problems we had; Kurt didn't even tell Mercedes. He and I are performers, so we performed around our friends and his family. We were a happily married couple as far as everyone saw, and most of the time we were. Still, we were having so many problems that more than once I know he searched marriage counselors and divorce attorneys on the internet. I know because I did too. We loved each other. Love wasn't the problem. Learning to be together in a real, legal marriage was the issue we had. So, yes it took months to get to a place where we were happy and in a healthy relationship.

On top of that, we had to deal with my father. For the longest time I couldn't understand why he didn't accept me. I tried to be everything for him – I got good grades, was popular, sang lead for the Warblers, earned the respect of the professors and my peers. Yet, whenever he looked at me I know all he could see was _GAY_. No matter what I did or who I impressed, he couldn't get past the fact that I _liked_ boys.

It's horrible, but I wished my dad was different. That he was like Burt. That he could be everything I needed. I think that's probably why I kind of hooked onto Burt. I know I'm really lucky to have found a partner with such an amazing father. Burt means so much to me. Of course, Kurt's opinion is the most important thing to me, but Burt's opinion comes pretty damn close. Burt has almost been like a father to me. I don't even know if Kurt realizes what Burt's done for me.

When I had that stupid mole on my back and the doctors wanted to remove it, I asked Burt to go with me. The doctors had been confident it was benign, but there was still a chance that it wasn't. I was scared. At the time I had only been eighteen and Kurt and I weren't together. All I could think of was that my life could change dramatically. I did research on cancer and treatments and even – funerals and wills. I didn't know what to do. I wrote a letter to Kurt, though. I told him everything I felt and how I wished we could've been together forever. Then I went into surgery and Burt sat in the waiting room. I remember counting backwards from 100 and only getting to 80 something, while breathing in that horrible anesthesia. Then the next thing I remember was a hand in mine and a voice telling me that "everything was going to be okay, kid." Burt stayed with me the entire time I was in recovery and that was enough.

Kurt and I eventually got back together and everything just seemed to click back into place. We made it through college together in separate states. Then one weekend while I was visiting him, he proposed. We had been laying in his bed together after missed you so fucking much sex, discussing our life together and then he just said, "let's get married Blaine Anderson." As much as we are both showmen, the way we decided to get married was small and intimate. There weren't big grand gestures or huge decorations of love. It was just the two of us, naked, in bed together. It was beautiful.

My father didn't come to the wedding. He made up some excuse as to why he couldn't make it, but I knew he couldn't watch his son marry another man. He couldn't sit in a room for an hour and watch his son make vows to love, honor and cherish the most important person in his world. It sucked, but I'd expected it. My mom promised up and down that he had wanted to be there, but we both knew it was a lie.

So I lived my life. Don't get me wrong, my father was a part of it. I saw him on holidays and trips back to Lima. I'd even give him the occasional phone call, but we never had that close relationship. We fought a lot too. When I'd bring Kurt home with me, he'd acknowledge him as my "friend." He'd parade ideas of women and how so and so's daughter was single. One time, he even had over some friends who just happened to have a daughter single daughter my age.

Kurt was always good at indulging my father by biting his tongue. I know it took a lot for him not to stand up and lash out. One of the things I admire so much about Kurt is the fact that he's fearless. He won't back down, he won't let other people tell him how to be, and he doesn't run away. As much as he claims transferring to Dalton was running away, I disagree. I called it self preservation. It's called ensuring safety. Kurt would've probably stayed at McKinley if it weren't for his life being threatened.

So, obviously, things haven't always been easy for us. Like, just when everything was going good in our marriage and our life together, Kurt got mugged. He was walking home on our well lit street and out of nowhere two assholes came out of nowhere. They stole his money and iPhone before roughing him up. They took away his sense of security for a damn cell phone, twenty-two dollars and seventeen cents, a Metro Card, and a cancelled bank card. I was away on business when it happened. The nurse left me a message telling me that my husband had been brought into the emergency room and to get there as soon as possible. Then I had a message from Finn saying to come to the apartment.

All I can remember is getting into my rental car and practically driving 90mph the whole way back to the apartment. I didn't bother to even park properly – just pulled up to the side of the apartment building and jumped out of the car. I tore up the stairs and threw the door open. Burt and Finn were inside sitting on the couch, quietly watching a game on TV. They pointed me to mine and Kurt's bedroom and I have never felt more relief than I did the moment I saw him. I think that's what changed both of us. We both realized we weren't invincible.

Things were still bad with my dad, though. It was one step forward and two steps back with him. Just when I thought he was accepting me, he'd do something. We'd fight; he'd make a snide comment. I felt bad for my mother. She was stuck in between us. I know it must have torn at her. A lot of the time she'd have to figure out whom to comfort, my father or me. She tried to remain neutral – how could she really pick between the man she loved or the child she bore. A lot of time, I'd tell her to go be with my father. I had Kurt and Burt. I guess you could say that I was used to it.

I never really liked to talk about my father. I liked to look like I had it all together. My upbringing was a huge part of this. I felt like I had to live up to the Anderson name; like it was this prestigious thing. Kurt was seriously the first person I ever felt like I could be 100% me around. Not Blaine Anderson, Dalton student, lead Warbler, rich kid, legacy, etc. I didn't need to hide behind the prep school mask. I could just be Blaine. Just simple Blaine. The guy who liked to read Vogue magazine, watch musicals, be silly and awkward sometimes. I know that I could go and sing and off-key Disney song wearing a pink tutu and Kurt wouldn't judge me – well maybe he would, but he'd probably say he loved me even more because of it.

With Kurt, I can tell him anything. I know that no matter what fight we get into, or if we're mad at each other, if I needed him – he'd be there for me in a second. There was one time when we had a huge argument. I don't even remember what it was about. I'm pretty sure it was something stupid, but a few hours afterwards I started to have incredible pain in my chest. It felt like someone was taking a knife and just shredding my insides. It got so bad that I felt like I couldn't breathe properly. I couldn't even get off the sofa without stabbing pain, so I texted Kurt telling him that I needed him. Literally, two seconds later he was running into the room. I know it freaked him out to see me on the couch, grabbing my chest.

My husband grabbed me up – I never knew he was that strong – and got us in a cab and to the emergency room. I felt bad for the nurses who had to deal with a freaked out, upset, demanding Kurt. He was practically shrieking orders at them. Of course, I was taken back to a doctor immediately, but they weren't going to let Kurt back with me. I've never told Kurt before, but I didn't want to have to face that alone. I was scared to be on my own. I needed him to hold my hand and run his fingers through my hair and tell me everything was going to be all right. That's exactly what he did. When we finally left the hospital, after finding out that Mexican food and my stomach aren't really a good mix, I was drained and Kurt held me until I fell asleep. Things happen and we deal with them, just like my heart attack scare that turned out to be acid reflux.

Through it all, though, good things happened to us too. Kurt made one of his dreams come true when he opened the Brummel House. When we were still in high school, we'd lie in bed together and he'd tell me how much he wanted to do something for his dad. He knew a lot of

gay kids' fathers wouldn't have been so accepting, like Burt was.

As we got older, that vision became more defined into a center with a mission to end bullying and give all kids a safe place to go – especially GLBTQ youth. It took a while, but Kurt found funding, staff, structure and everything he needed to bring the Brummel House to reality. I've never been as proud of him as I was when he stood up at the Brummel House benefit dinner and told his story to a thousand people without fear or hesitation. I know Burt felt it too because I remember looking over to him and seeing his face full of so much pride and joy.

I wished just once that my father would have that look about me. With our history and the way things were between us, I would say that would be a wish I'd never get. However, now, my dad is starting to come around – slowly. It's going to take a hell of a lot more work before we're at the point where he can be comfortable with Kurt and I showing any PDA towards each other. He tries to hide it, but I see him cringe when Kurt simply pats my hand or runs a hand across my shoulder when he walks by.

Yet, he's trying. I mean, surprise of all surprises, he and my mother agreed to come on this cruise with Kurt's dad and Carole. I never thought it would ever be possible to see Burt, Carole, my parents, Kurt and myself all sitting around a dinner table together, but it's happening. My dad even started an unprompted conversation with Kurt the other day. He still hasn't been able to watch mine and Kurt's wedding DVD, but he's working his way up to it. To me, him just being here is a huge, giant, colossal step. If it wasn't for Burt's book, do I think he'd be here? No, I really don't.

Like I said, it's been one heck of a year. It's about to get more insane too. We haven't told anyone (not even Burt), but Kurt and I had a meeting with an adoption agency last week. Nothing's settled and we're still looking at all our options, but there is a very real possibility that this time next year, we're going to be parents. We still haven't decided if we're going to surrogate, adopt or if kids are really in our future. I know that I want a family one day, and I think Kurt does too. Yet, if Kurt ends up saying no, I'll be incredibly happy to spend the rest of our lives together, just the two of us. I really don't think that'll be the case, though. Kurt's going to be an amazing father, not to mention our kid's going to have fabulous clothes and a killer fashion sense.

Wow, Kurt's right. I do feel better now that I've done this. Maybe I'll do it again someday. Kurt told me that he thinks I have a tendency to bottle up emotions and keep everything hidden, sometimes even around him. I suppose he's right to a certain extent. So, I'm going to go now. I'm going to go up to the deck and sit next to my husband and enjoy the day. When we get back to shore, I know that we're going to go back to a hectic life, but right now I don't want to think about anything. I'm not going to think about clients or work. I'm going to kiss my husband and tonight we're going to make love to each other and in the morning who knows. We don't need to figure out everything today, or even tomorrow. .

The future is ours.

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A/N: So this is it. Thank you all so much for all your kind words and amazing feedback. I may not have the most reviews, but the reviews you guys give are the best (in my opinion). You guys have shared so many amazing stories and hearing about some of your journey's is just amazing. I never realized how much support and love I'd get for writing this. I've gotten several messages saying this story helped someone come out to their family, or opened dialogue between someone and their family. I am truly blown away by you guys. I don't have the words to say how much your support has meant to me!

Don't fret, there just may be more stuff coming up ;)


	33. Exciting News

First off, I'm so blown away that I'm still receiving reviews on this story! I had so much fun writing it and creating this verse! I have read every review I've gotten and they mean so much to me! I'm so glad you guys have responded so positively to this story. It just is really amazing for me to see. :)

Second, exciting news – there will be a sequel!

I have two questions for you readers:

Would you rather I post a new story for the sequel or add the sequel to this story?

If I were to get a tumblr where I would post snippets and different thoughts on this story, would you follow it? Is that something you guys are interested in?

Third – you can get a taste of what the sequel will be like here: anisalee(dot)livejournal(dot)com(slash)34630(dot)html


	34. Sequel is Up

Sequel is up!

Go check out "Where I Was, Where I'm Going."

Make sure to set your alerts for that story too.

Also, follow me on tumblr – username anisaleefiction

Thank you all so much for your love and support! I hope this sequel can live up to your expectations! :)


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